i broke up with my bf earlier today cos he just couldn't bring himself to tell me how he felt about me. I was always telling him how much i cared about him and hated things being so one-sided (i needed to feel secure and loved in the relationship). i told him over a week ago that if he couldn't find a way to express himself i was walking away from us. anyhow, nothing changed and so i did. today on the phone he was telling me how upset he was and asked if i'd come see him tomorrow night, i felt sorry for him and so i said yes. i'm just worried that he's going to start crying and tell me all the things i wanted to hear - but i really think its too late now, he had so many chances and only did something about it when i left him. how do i stand strong and stick to my decision if he starts crying and saying all the sweet things i've been dying to hear...?
2007-02-18 02:20:22 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That is up to you. You made the rules and you are the only one who can make you stand up to them, if you give in to them now then what will you give into further down the road? That is the thing you need to think about. You decided this and this is what you wanted and you should be the one who sticks behind what you said. It shouldn't matter what others think, it's up to you and how you would feel. But if you give in and take him back now what will you give into next time? What will the crying work at the next time?
2007-02-18 02:30:28 · answer #1 · answered by Tigerluvr 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People communicate differently. Immensly so. Especially men and women. Just because its easy for you to say what your feeling, it might not be for him. He might not be able to say it. Maybe he's the type that tries to express it in another way.
Yes you want to feel secure and safe and loved, but i'm telling you, you dont need to hear i love you ever five minutes to feel that way.
Clearly how you are communicating now isnt working. You need to compromise and find a way to help him. Ask him how he feels, and why doesnt he say it. Than if you can find a way to work around it, then make it work.
To be honest though, he might say what you want to hear, and it might not validate anything for you. Dont you think theres a possiblity that he might say it once and never again? Or maybe theres a chance that maybe you need more attention than he can ever give you.
Either way, you should put a lot of thought into what he says AFTER he says it before you come to a clear decision.
2007-02-18 10:29:08 · answer #2 · answered by mettophobic 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if i was u i would play hard 2 get :: of coarse now things are gonna get 2 him cause u left :: he shouldve thought of all the things that couldve happened ahead of time :: if u really wanna get back at him then dont go 2nite jus find somethin 2 do like go 2 yo friends house or let them come over there go out and have sum fun or somethin jus do somethin that will make u get ur mind off of him :: then wen he ask jus be like i had things 2 do then set up a date or somethin jus be like lets go out 2 lunch :: let him say wat he gotta say :: act like it doesnt phase u then in the end show him all the love and be like now u see how i was feelin it doesnt feel 2 good do it??? :: then maybe u 2 would be back on good terms!::
Good Luck!
2007-02-18 10:35:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some guys can't say the words but they show you they care in action and deeds. If you feel he does care for you, why are you so bent on hearing the words? Quit being so controlling and go listen to what he has to say.
2007-02-18 10:27:59 · answer #4 · answered by mamabear1957 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you love him? if you dont then leave him alone if you do love him then listen to him maybe his family never expressed them kind of feelings around him so naturally he wouldn't know how to with his girlfriend give him a chance and maybe teach him how to let the words out that are inside him
2007-02-18 10:26:56 · answer #5 · answered by pinkpearlspetite 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may be right about telling what you want to hear. i say take some time apart and see what happens.
2007-02-18 10:25:22 · answer #6 · answered by sarah 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes its harder for some people to express their feelings... as long as he showed he cared about you whats the problem??
2007-02-18 10:27:52 · answer #7 · answered by brenda4ever 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk it through, sometimes we have to swallow our pride.We shouldn't allow that to get in the way of true love.........
2007-02-18 10:30:08 · answer #8 · answered by sircrazydude90 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly if you want him... go over there listen to his sob story and take him back... but if you don't want him anymore, don't go. It's really just that simple.
good luck
2007-02-18 10:25:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why wouldn't you give him another chance?
2007-02-18 10:30:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋