rarely meet but r in contact .we were happy until this problem didn't arise....I dont know how & why, i feel I DONT LOVE HIM ANYMORE. The way i've loved him,i can't let him go......He is hurt moreover i dont want 2 betray him.Decision is all up 2 me.WHY THIS HAPPENIN...totally confused..Help me PLS !!!
2007-02-17 22:55:10 · 7 answers · asked by riya 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Love and relationships have their ups and downs. The mistakes we make is thinking it is all bad when the downs come. Give it time. Its prolly coz of the distance that you feeling like this.
You guys should talk more, call each other more and maybe try to see each other a lil more. Give it time.......Imagine all that you have been through with him for the last 4years.........Is it worth throwing away?
I read a book called Marriage Works by J.John. Its about relationships in general. It is a great help........ Ave learnt that relationships are more about enduring,companionship,caring and commitment. Nothing lasts for ever, the lows come and go but how you both go about them is important, it could bring you even closer together. If you need to know more contact me.
Assuming this guy loves you I could tell you to count yourself lucky. Many are the guys and girls out there who are single and lonely. Wishing they had someone who loved them and adored them.
Take time and listen to your heart. It will tell you what should be done. Everytime the wind blows, it gives you a message........Listen, carefully.
Goodluck and take time.
2007-02-17 23:18:34 · answer #1 · answered by gracie g 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its quite normal dear, when you meet a person on a daily basis, and talk a lot you kinda get attached to that person, but when you are far from a person who actually is your love as you assume, its hard to continue your relationship as you dont know what he is doing what he is thinking and what he wants to talk when he gets up in the morning or comes to the office.. and its always hard to shre things when someone is not in front of you or hardly meets you. You tend to feel like i need someone close whom i can see and talk to every now and then... and in your case as you said its been more than 4 years its pretty difficult to stay in love with any person, it can only happen if you fall in love with a star whom you can not meet actually!! So if you actually dont wanna lose him, better start thinking whether you can survive in this relationship or not.. in the end its your decision that matters...
take care
Deeps
2007-02-18 08:19:32 · answer #2 · answered by Deeps 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Face it. The fact is that you never loved him. At this point when you have realised that your decision was wrong, you wanna escape the guilt of hurting him. I don't understand why do people commit themselves to be in love when they don't really understand the ups and downs of life. Since when di love start changing colours in relationships?
Anyways, since you have realised your mistake, better call off. Doesn't matter if it hurts him. Both of you will go through it as time passes. Hurting him now is better then developing the relationship further and then passing on the burden. It would be more difficult for you then...
:-)
2007-02-18 15:51:05 · answer #3 · answered by plato's ghost 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
fair enough, I'll see what i can do to help. I've pulled the long distance relationship a couple of times, and its hard. distance has a way of changing things. one time a while back i was dating this girl that lived about 4 hours away from me. at first everything was grand. she was more than i could have ever asked for. ( this will have a point, you just have to bear with me, plus it might give you an inside to what his reaction will be.) she was the perfect girlfriend. but over time, she started to go through what you are going through now. i didn't notice it at first, but eventually i caught on. she ended up breaking up with me about a week after her birthday. it took me along time to get over it, but eventually i learned this.
you, I'm assuming care about the other person. you want to avoid hurting them, but you don't want to deny what your feeling right now. now whatever led up to this feeling I'm not sure of, but odds are its making you feel like your in world war 2, on the beaches of Normandy, during the middle of d-day.
sucks don't it?
as far as betraying him, the longer that you hold out, the more you "stab him in the heart." most guys, would rather hear things like this up front. granted there are guys out there, that say things like this don't bother them, but it does. if he hears it up front, then he'll get over it quicker. it won't put him through hell. you've got to remember this. granted you might have feeling for this guy, and I'm sure that he's a nice guy. but the longer that you hold out, wondering what to do, the worse its going to be on both of you. the only way to get this problem to go away is to suck it up, take a breath, and squeeze off the shot.
i know that sounds weird, but it makes sense if you think about it.
also another piece of advice, one that has helped me with alot. its somthing that my grandfather always told me. he told me to believe in what i do. believe that i can do anything, that i can overcome any obsticle that is in my path. believe in what i am, so strongly that nothing can convince you otherwise. if you do that bryant, then you will be able to lead a happy life.
by the way if you want you can add me on yahoo messenger. the_3_rd is my yahoo id.
2007-02-18 07:19:44 · answer #4 · answered by the_3_rd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what do you think love is a joke!! it is a very fine feeling that comes from the bottom of your heart. I'm in luv with a girl who is, i don't know, where in the world, but i still luv her. it doesn't matter whether she luvs me or not but I'm searching for her in this big world. my friend loved a girl who suffered from a deadly disease called blood cancer but that didn't mattered to him. she had passed away but that guy loved her so much that he still believes that she is somewhere near him.
2007-02-18 07:30:43 · answer #5 · answered by sunny s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u really luv him than it doesn't matter he was very close to you or far to u. If u have found anyone which r very close to u n u think u luv the new one, i think. That's all depends on u which one u luv u. Luv is the feeling of heart. Listen urs heart. n tell the first one abt ur feeling.
2007-02-18 07:10:23 · answer #6 · answered by Amit K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is nautral feeling. you donot have to be guilty of doing the betrayal. out sight out of mind. you understand.
now the serious part is that if you feel that he is true love then you should meet him once and let him understand your feeling. if this guy of yours is keeping the relation for the heck of it as we all men do ( to have one at home and one for the road) then its high time that you leave this fellow and get steady with someone who is serious of a relation.
do understand that love is not about sacrifice, love is about belongingness, to care and share. do not be stupid to wait for things to happen and hten curse yourself for every thing that went wrong. this loving itself is wrong. ask your parents to find an alliance and get married and stay close to him. have babies and complete your womenhood.
2007-02-18 07:27:13 · answer #7 · answered by sri577201 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋