If a woman is seeing someone (not married or engaged)....?

Question

is it acceptable to make a play for her? I want her sooooo bad!

and I don't mean for the night! I mean forever!

Answer 1

Go for it James!
hope you had a good time in Barce?

Answer 2

acceptable by who?

These days, marriage is a tricky thing to define. A lot of people are raising kids in stable relationships for decades, but never bothered with (or aren't allowed) the piece of paper that says "marriage".

If they're polyamorous, then its OK. If they're living together then its definitely not. Other than that, the person to ask is her. But it is going to get complicated..
BTW You can't really know you want someone forever when you don't really know her. (if you really knew her, you'd already know all these answers).

And even if shes in a vulnerable relationship, do you really want someone on the rebound? or someone thats willing to cheat on her man?

And are you willing to be the a-hole that broke up somebody else's relationship?

You must know that you'd be rolling some big dice - and the most likely result is that when the dust settles you'll still be alone and have lost several friends.

Answer 3

I met my dream girl and told her how I felt, we shared the same feelings, the problem was we worked together and she was living with someone else ! That was cool from a work point because we were both encouraged as thats how both our employers had met & became partners in life and in the business ! The thing was that after I told her how I felt I still had to deal with work and with her not leaving the guy ! I was told she needed to be shown more, but how far do you have to go ? I knew she was unhappy with him as she was a different person three years ago when she was younger and less upwardly mobile than she is today.

After a while the thought of her going home to another man sickened me ! I couldn't ask her out to dinner because there was interference now coming from other employees. The thought of having dinner with her and telling her again how I still felt would have killed me - knowing the whole time she would still go home to share her bed with another man that same night ! So I left it at that, she eventually got engaged to this guy even though she told a friend it was out of "convienience" !!!!!!!!! I left work, travelled around the world havn't been able or bring myself to or want to work for the past 5 months, but I do start my new job tomorrow ! This is a real turning point for me !

If I knew than what I know now I would have made a more persistent, direct take charge play for her, the worst thing is thats all it would have taken !

Answer 4

There are so many marriages that do not last these days because people jump into them instead of using dating as what it is...getting to know the person and making sure that person is the right one for you. With that said, if the two of you are more compatible than the two of them, then she has a decision to make. Also, if she choses you over him, it does not mean she is untrustworthy - it means she's smart and following her heart - and might not end up a divorcee in 5 years. Get my drift? I don't think you should come on to her. I think you should be honest with her about your feelings. She will respect you more and you will seem like a bigger man if you do not come across like you are trying to 'steal' or 'break up' her current relationship - just plant the idea. Good luck and keep it real - don't lose yourself by trying too hard.

Answer 5

Yes...but woo her, make her feel special...watch 'Love Actually' - the part where the guy turns up at Keira Nightly's door with the cards. Be romantic... if it doesn't work, then its not meant to be and bow out graciously. But YOU HAVE TO TELL HER. Don't be pushy, just let her know she's amazing. Don't send gifts, as it will put her in an awkward position. All is fair in love and war.

By the way, if she was married, then its a big NO NO!!

Answer 6

if she leaves the man she is with to be with you, would you ever trust her? Would you not have a constant niggle at the back of your mind that if she can walk out on one relationship to be with you, that she might do exactly the same thing to you in the future?

If you really like this girl, be her friend. let her realise how special you are. allow her to make her own choice when she is ready. if she believes the man she is with at the moment is the one, then she will stay with him & you will have to accept it. if she has any doubts about her feelings for him, but you are there in the background being her close friend, her confidente, then sooner or later you will know if she reciprocates your feeling.

by just making a move on her & trying to drag her away from this other man, you could either end up with a girlfriend who is incapable of loyalty to you or losing the friendship of someone you care about. give her time, if she is meant for you it will work out.

Answer 7

James

Perhaps you need to ask yourself how you would feel if you were seeing someone (not married or engaged), and someone made a play for her. How would you feel?
Remember that the best things in life come to he who waits.

Best wishes, J

Answer 8

if she's not engaged or married then I think that it would be ok to ask her out. As long as you are prepared for the answer being no and her then telling her bf and him getting angry at you. But you never know she might be unhappy in the relationship and she might say yes.

Answer 9

You can do, but I wouldn't as she is seeing someone.

Also if you do decide to ask her as she is already seeing someone then don't be surprised if she turns you down. However if she does say yes, then just remember that if she can cheat on the current guy that she is seeing with you, then don't be surprised that when and if the two of you do start seeing each other she cheats on you

Answer 10

Yes, it is OK.
Instead of actually asking her out, you may play it low-key by talking with her on phone, or briefly in person, mailing a pretty romantic card in the mail now and then, etc. to make sure she knows that you are still interested....and to make sure she doesn't forget that you are out there desiring her.

Answer 11

I just answered you to the other question.

OF COURSE its acceptable - You go for it!!
and like I said before - be caring and just let her
know you fancy her rotten!!!.

Sorry I missed the bit where she IS seeing someone.
YOU can try - but it all depends on how serious it is with her
man. She had just better not be tempted to see both of you.