My bf and I live in a two-bedroom with a friend. He has his own room, but for the last couple of months he's constantly been falling asleep on the couch(es). He stays up late playing on his laptop, and falls asleep right where he's at. I work third shift, and I am sick of coming home at 5AM to him passed out in our "common living area." We've talked to him about it, and now he has switched to falling asleep on the couch that HE brought to the apt, apparently thinking this is acceptable, because it's his. How do I get it through his head that it still interferes with our ability to use the living room, and is rude?
2007-02-17 22:04:10 · 13 answers · asked by Dawn 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I can kind of see where you're coming from, but I can also see where he is coming from. His behavior seems pretty acceptable to me, it's not like he's sleeping during the normal day house. Technically it's your hours that are odd or possibly interfering. You have to remember that the apartment is just as much his as it is yours. And who's to say he's doing it to be malicious. He has equal rights to do it because it's just as much his apartment to do so. It's kind of self-centered to expect it always to be open for you(the living room). Just find somewhere else to do whatever you were going to do, he can't possibly be in there so much that you can NEVER use the common area.
2007-02-17 22:12:42 · answer #1 · answered by Jenn 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Oh honey, I hear you! It is so frustrating to feel like you have to constantly tip-toe around your own home. After a hard night of work, everyone should have the right to come home, pour a glass of wine and unwind on the couch. Bedrooms are for sleeping and sex... when you take the stress of work straight into the bedroom, both can take a dive.
Suggest a desk for the living room, complete with a smaller chair on wheels. It will make falling asleep much more difficult. Or start waking him up when he's passed out and gently say, "Dude, go to bed."
People like to fall asleep in the same, comfortable, place, and once you get in the habit of falling asleep somewhere, it can be hard to change. If there are blankets on the couch, toss them on his bed. If you see him passed out on the couch again with those same blankets, you know it was intentional and might want to sit down with him and have a serious talk about respect and your needs as roommates.
Good luck, and I hope you are able to enjoy your living room soon!
2007-02-21 00:01:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Roommate Sleeping
2017-01-15 05:01:21 · answer #3 · answered by parrino 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't teach a grown man manners, he either has them or he doesn't. I would just go about things like he was not there. If he wakes up & gets snotty, tell him that he does have a bed and that you have just as much right to the use of the livingroom as he does. This is one reason why I HATE having roommates! If things don't get any better, talk to your boyfriend about the 2 of you getting your own place. I can't think of any other option.
2007-02-18 00:13:53 · answer #4 · answered by Julia B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he may be thinking that it is his apartment to and he can fall asleep where ever he wants. Other then in your room.
You dont go right to sleep when you come home.? Do you use the living room. ?
If you really want him out of the living room, when you come in from work try turning on all the lights in the living room and the tv and sit down and get on the phone and talk to someone .
Maybe after a few time he will get the picture and stop sleeping in the living room.
2007-02-17 23:39:56 · answer #5 · answered by LadyCatherine 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't try to be quiet if its morning and I need to use the kitchen and hes sleeping on the couch thats not my
problem especially since he has a private room so i'm not tip toeing if I need to turn a light on and its disturbing
him I would simply tell him then go to your bedroom the living room is not for sleeping of course if guests or
friends need somewhere to crash momentarily thats a different story but in this case he's always camped sleeping
2016-01-14 11:18:51 · answer #6 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you are tackling this problem in the wrong way. Don't let the fact that he is asleep in the common area of the apartment stop you from going about the things you would normally do. It is his choice to fall asleep there and he can move if your coming and going, watching TV or anything else you may need to do bothers him. In fact make as much of a disturbance as you can and then he may decide to use his room more.
2007-02-17 22:13:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I don't really have an answer for you but I can top your story-- I rented a room from a lady... One bathroom in the house... In the middle of the night she'd fall asleep ON THE TOILET! Not being able to use the living room isn't as bad as not being able to 'do your business' if you know what i mean!
2007-02-18 06:04:33 · answer #8 · answered by Jebbie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think this is unacceptable. There are sheets on beds to stop sweat at night soaking through to the mattress. Your flatmate is sweating into the settee, which is horrible if you also have to sit on it. The room will begin to smell stale as well. Maybe you could suggest that he pays more rent if he now has two bedrooms.
2007-02-17 22:13:33 · answer #9 · answered by the_emrod 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am not saying it is right but it is his place too. You and your boyfriend need to get a place of your own. Me personally I would rather sleep on a bed than a couch but to each his own.
2007-02-17 23:14:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋