my best guy friend has been a real support system for me for the last few years. we get along great and have shared alot with each other. he has always had a gf and i even had a fiance when i first met him. we did become intimate for about a year and then we stopped it to save the friendship and because he couldnt deal with the guilt. although we stopped the physical we are always attracted to each other when we are together. he is now engaged and i wished him well and have distanced myself from him trying to be a good friend. he will never talk to me about their relationship or ever bring her up. he even goes as far as making up other excuses when i ask about his plans. (for example he says he has to help his parents with stuff, goingdinner with his folks, has to get a work call,) come on ...why does he lie and why does he avoid speaking about her? i know he is engaged..makes no sense to me? i am trying to get used to the idea of him being engaged but hes not helping.
2007-02-17 20:11:57 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He doesn't want to hurt our feelings. He knows there was one time where you and him got intimated, so he's simply concerned.
2007-02-17 20:18:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When men fall inlove, they put the lady up on a pedestal of sorts and WILL keep their intimate details private. The dont want to sully the relationship by talking about her to you....so that you can feel a one-upman-ship or superior to her. He's already done enough with you to feel guilty about....so its important to him now that he doesnt insult her further by gossiping about what THEY do together.
He doesnt want you to know what they are doing because their love is separate to his friendship with you. He will talk about his life with family to his family...not you because he's made his choice and it wasnt you. He doesnt want you to have any info that is not readily available to the general public. If he feels in any way that you still have feelings for him....he doesnt want that to ruin his chances with her.
So, he's protecting himself.....and he's very sensible to do that. If that hurts you.....that she is now his best friend...then maybe you need to back off and become an aquaintance again.
2007-02-17 20:31:26 · answer #2 · answered by Scully 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he's just in denial for lieing and doesn't wanna hurt you. maybe he's a very good liar and says he's engaged but he's really not. guys sometimes don't wanna talk to their best friends about their g/f's believe it or not. it could be that he doesn't want you to get jealous or get mad about how she is or he just has nothing to say about her to you. but i doubt that. i'd sit him down and ask why he's avoiding the subject of him and his lady friend lol for all you know, it could be him being embarassed of her. who knows. hope you figure this out. i bet it's nothing to be worried about.
2007-02-17 20:40:37 · answer #3 · answered by Ahmad 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call him out about it.
Tell him it hurts you when he lies about seeing her.
Talk to him about your feelings, I am sure that will help more than anything else.
2007-02-17 20:17:20 · answer #4 · answered by huskerslord 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋