My fiance has started being really mean to me for really no reason. What is problem?

Question

When I say mean I am talking about borderline cruel. I broke out in hives for no reason and he would not get me any medicine, or tale me to the hospital. He said to me" I am not a doctor what do want me to do about it". So I go alone to the hospital and when I come home I ask him to lay with me because I don't feel well, he says ok but I want to go to the store. When he comes back from the store he says hey I want to go out with my friend for a while, you don't mind right. I cannot understand why he is being this way, when I ask him why he has an attitude or why he will not be there for me he says he has no clue what I am talking about.Any tips on what is going on? or how to deal with this?

This is an on and off problem that has been going on for a while, but he has never been that mean. He also says at the same time that nothing is wrong and he will not discuss it further because he says there is nothing to talk about there is nothing wrong with him.

Answer 1

Could be fear of commitment, losing his independence, still wanting to be single and hang with his buddies or he's cheating on you with that "friend" you don't mind him going out with. Whatever the reason, he's gotten sick of you and doesn't want to deal with you or this relationship anylonger. So he's sending you a message that he wants out but lacks the guts to come right out and tell you. He's finding out that being in a relationship isn't all fun and games like during his carefree single days. He's finding out that it comes with wanting to have the desire, which he lacks, to be a supportive, caring person to the woman he says he loves and who he has lead to believe that he wants to spend the rest of his life with. It seems he's found out that he isn't cut out for any of this and it has infringed on his space. So instead of telling you like a man he plays these unconscious mind games resulting in his cruel mistreatment toward you which has caused your outbreak of hives. These hives just didn't happen for no reason, rather his meanness has made you a nervous wreck and your physical self is reacting. If he continues to push you away you're going to have to face the fact that you two shouldn't remain together. If he won't start taking care of you, like you deserve, then the marriage is definitely out. Continuing with this abuse is only going to make you more sick and sooner or later the inevitable seperation is going to happen. In the long run you'll end up better off. You can get yourself healed, start to feel better and move on to a life of fullfillment that you so richly are entitled to.

Answer 2

thank you for sharing all of that with us. there is not any common answer yet he's clearly having some themes staggering now (which i think of are stemming from an significant lack of self belief) and my substantial concept is that yet it is going to likely be relatively perplexing, i don't sense you will possibly desire to proceed with the marriage the way issues at present stand. i understand i do no longer understand the two of you, nor your relationship and that i say sorry for imparting you with this way of direct opinion on such an significant subject. in the top, it is going to likely be your determination yet i think of your emotions are valid and you may desire to have confidence them. you already know the themes won't basically bypass away as quickly as married, and even have the aptitude to enhance worse. making plans a marriage and basically having the marriage so close could be a frustrating time for a pair, yet there's a extreme miscommunication between you that's no longer being resolved. He speaks of 'resolutions' yet his words and strikes are counterproductive. postponing or calling off the marriage will harm and it relatively is between the main perplexing judgements you will ever make, however the wonderful element isn't continuously common, and you will shop the two you and he a miles better deal of harm sooner or later that ought to effect in case you bypass forward with it, understanding deep down some thing isn't staggering. no one or relationship is suited, yet that's no longer the type you opt for for to start a marriage. I choose I had extra desirable advice. i understand this might desire to be so perplexing for you, yet have confidence your self, and understand that throughout the time of the top, each and every thing would be ok. i visit maintain you in my prayers.

Answer 3

I cannot tell you how angry I would be if my fiance did not accompany me in a hospital visit. Reading this makes me angry. Have you brought up this issue with him, if not let that be the first step. Don't go around acting like nothing is bothering you, that is the worst thing to do. My official answer for you is after you bring this up with him and his behavior seems the same or even gets work seek professionel help. Also it could possibly be pre wedding jitters.

Answer 4

Marriage is suppose to be a commitment for life. To love, honor and cherish and all that jazz. Think about that. If his behavior towards you is "borderline cruel" when you are engaged, do you really think it will change once you are married? My ex-husband's did not. He verbally abusive and this all sounds all too familiar. Now, it may not be your situation. But, you are right to think twice.
My advise is to stop and think long and hard about what you WANT from a husband. Then ask yourself, does your finance fit the bill. I trust you'll know, deep down, what is the right thing for you to do.

Answer 5

That is tough. He was different before this? This may be an indicator that this is his true nature. Are you willing to live with that? Also, it may be that he (or his friends) are doubting that this should go forward. TALK IT OUT!!! Cold feet? Nature? Find out. You don't wan to regret your wedding day.

Answer 6

I tell you this now....if he's acting this way, then I'm positive he'll act that way if you marry him. All he's thinking about is himself, which means he's immature. My best advice to you......call off the wedding until he straightens up, if he even straightens up. It's far more better to be single and lonely, than married and miserable. Think about this really hard.....I've seen this more than one time. Best of luck to you.

Answer 7

Try talking about it again.

Answer 8

Weird he's avoiding you.. Do you think he might be cheating... stressed out? Drugs?..