Boyfriend says he hasn't thought much about a separation agreement from ex, am I nuts?

Question

I told him we needed to give each other space as he doesn't seem to be finalizing things with the Ex(they weren't married but share a child)(seperated for only 10 monthes), we've been dating for 8 months. He started moving things out from the house they still own together(he does not live there) and visits his son at the house and with hockey three times a week. Their finances are still joint as she never worked, I'm getting frustrated as I feel as if I'm in the unknown as to their situation or if she even knows he's dating.
I know he's madly in love with me and he says that "I feel right". We're always together except for when he visits the son. I feel as though I'm a secret even though he introduced me to his eldest son(from his ex-wife of ten years ago). He monopolizes my time so I can't see others.

Am I crazy for putting a hold on our relationship even though I feel he is the one? I'm getting sick from stress, how much time does one need for a separtion agreement?

Answer 1

Get rid of him..... he's got too many exes and too much baggage to go along with them. And he can't finalize anything with them. You could be waiting around for a long time to be the next ex.


"All my exes live in Texas"

Answer 2

No, you aren't crazy for putting a hold on. In fact, it seems to me you're coming to the "hold" a little late. The reason is that it's often 20 miles of bad road to get your emotions deeply involved in a one-sided or skewed relationship where all parties aren't on the same, level, playing field of arrangements. Without some sort of severance, you'll still be "up in the air" and not on solid ground.
BTW, that is one reason society at large accepts marriage. It is, among many other things, an announcement to the world that the two are a couple--which is what you don't have.
You have EVERY right to your feelings, your life, and respect for all things that make you, you. It very much appears that he slip-slides through life and for some folks that works. For me, and I'd guess for you, it doesn't satisfy the need and longing for commitment.

Answer 3

That does not sound like a man who is madly in love, because if loved you, he would be taking care of his business. It sounds like he is unsure what he wants to do, but in the mean time of figuring things out, he have you to play with. Clearly, if someone have not cut ties with their significant other, do not enter into a relationship with them. Their is always a possibility they may get back with the person. Leave him alone until he straightens out his business, that would cut down on some confusion.