2007-02-17 11:57:13 · 12 answers · asked by stephen h 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
i cannot live with myself
2007-02-17 12:04:31 · update #1
Well, that sounds like a normal reaction.
Was it something that just involved you, or another person?
Does it require you to make amends to anyone? or just yourself?
And, since you didn't realize you were doing it, then perhaps your guilt is a wee bit misplaced?
Just a thought. I understand the concept about doing something that makes us feel guilty, but if you weren't doing it intentionally, you need to let yourself off the hook.
If you cannot live with yourself, then you need to reach out for more help... go seek counselling or mental health help that will allow you to put whatever you did to rest. It's not worth beating yourself up for.. honest.
2007-02-17 12:03:44 · answer #1 · answered by barbieisthe1 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your seeking for help and advice is a sign that you are -wanting- to move forward. Well done!
Guilt and Shame is a punishing emotion. It can result in lack of assertiveness, shyness, feelings of inadequacy, despair etc.
Often though, to feel guilty you are implying a few things; you may be implying that your behaviour equals YOU. . You may have done a shamefull thing, but that CANNOT make you a shameful person, unless you believe that.
One bad act (or a few) cannot make someone "bad", likewise would you call someone "good" for doing ONE good thing? hmm?
Because you are a fallible, error-prone human with strengths and weaknessess, you will inevitably make mistakes. This is a learning process that enables us to learn and grow.
You can NOW accept yourself for being a fallible human being, accept that although you didnt like your act, that you CAN work hard in the future to ACT better. Remember that you are NEVER a shamefull or guilty person.Nobody is worthy of damnazation and demonization, and this is the result of telling yourself "because I did so damn bad, as I MUST NOT HAVE, I am a bad and shamefull person. I deserve this and to be punished and looked down upon."
This would be much healthier to handle your situation "I would have PREFERED Not to have failed on this ONE occasion, but I can learn from this and work towards acting better in the future. My mistake proeves that I am a fallible human with strengths and weaknesses. I neednt endlessly berate myself for my weaknesses."
Given yourslef labels such as "bad" and "Guilty" also imply a few things
1. That you can ONLY ever act bad.
2. That You have ALWAYS ACTED BAD.
3. That you are incapble of acting good in the future.
These are illogical generalisations, becuase we as humans, have the ability to change our performances constantly. We have also done plenty of good things in our lives.
Guilt is not a constructive emotion; it tends to lock people in dis-empowered states. It rarley leads to health and happiness. Far better to accept yourslef and your situation, and move forward.
If you feel guilty for a length of time it will be good for you to talk to your doctor, and maybe ask for some help. I wish you the best.
2007-02-17 23:17:47 · answer #2 · answered by RadicalReason 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What was it? I'mm too curious - and it's hard to answer a question without knowing the details.
Whatever it is - realise guilt won't solve a thing. Nothing you do can ERASE the past so merely get over it - without trying to sound harsh.
2007-02-17 20:29:17 · answer #3 · answered by Straight Talker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all do stupid things from time to time. I, for example, kept secrets from my best friend and hurt her so badly she almost left. And thats one of the smaller things. If you realize you've done something wrong, its up to you to stop doing it and do what you can to make it right. Best of luck.
2007-02-17 12:09:53 · answer #4 · answered by wonderer152 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 months ago is a bit too late to start worrying about it. If it hasn't radically affected your life in that time, I'd say you shouldn't worry about it.
2007-02-17 12:21:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends what you have done, and why its taken 2 months to realise it.
2007-02-17 12:03:37 · answer #6 · answered by karl p 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seek counselling.
2007-02-17 13:04:57 · answer #7 · answered by CLICKHEREx 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Me too, i've been collecting newspaper cut outs of Robbie Williams. I need to quit now!
2007-02-17 12:01:54 · answer #8 · answered by yeahbutnobut 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
don't bottle it up, talk to someone about it and if possible ,try to repair any damage it may have caused.in the end you have to forgive your self.
2007-02-21 03:43:32 · answer #9 · answered by mermaid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever it is it can't be that bad.
Unless yo have killed a lot of people.
Otherwise it is nothing that can't be fixed.
2007-02-17 12:08:40 · answer #10 · answered by monkeymanelvis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋