what happens when you dont know who you are??

Question

well, umm, i just moved with my dad because my real mom use to abuse me all the time and i was tired of it so i told my dad. me and him never really communicated so i was very sad because i really missed my mom. she was everything to me even if she abused me. my father was never there for me untill i needed help. i was a nerd at my old school, here, where i live now, i beame pretty popular. i was a gangster @ skool because everyone told me to be a gangster and i thought it was pretty kool. then, my dad started to yell at me and i decided to stop khuz i wanted to make him happy. well the i was very sad khuz everyone was picking on me @ skool and then i became emo. i started to slah my wrists. and my dad sooner found out. so i decided to be prep. now i have no clue who i am

Answer 1

Wow. It sounds like you've been having a tough time. Still, I'm certain that things will start getting better for you because you're asking the right question- "Who am I?" It sounds like you've been defining your identity around what category you fit into in school (nerd, gangster, emo, prep, etc). You have to decide whether you want to be a category.

The kids I admired most when I was growing up were the ones who had the confidence to ignore the invisible lines that divide the different groups (emo, gangster, etc) in school, and had decided that they could wear whatever they wanted, talk to whoever they wanted, etc. They didn't really care what other people thought. They were some of the nicest and happiest people I ever met.

A first step towards figuring out who you are and where you fit in... start a journal. Write about your feelings about your parents. Write poetry or stories. Write about your anger and frustration when you have a bad day. Take time to think about what's important to you and what you want to be when you grow up.

Next, say hi to two people you wouldn't normally speak to in school. The next day, say hi to two more people. Then two more. Do this every day. Be genuinely nice. Honestly... I think this will help.

Best of luck.

Answer 2

You know exactly who you are. You are signed in as confused and that is what you are confused. Slow down. Stop trying to force a personality from yourself. Ask yourself what kind of person do I want to become? I'm not talking about a job, I'm talking about character. Do you want to be honest, hard working, sneaky, kind, direct, tell it like it is, loud, soft. What do you want people to think of you? What do you want to think of yourself? You have had a very difficult life thus far. Please take advantage to the oppurtunity your dad is giving you being in a abusive free envirnoment that you can discover who your are instead of trying to protect yourself. As difficult as growing up is, and going to school with a bunch of kids, and trying to fit in, please remember that this will not last forever. Soon you will be adult and still be confused if you don't start asking yourself the hard questions now. The wrist slashing is you trying to show people the pain you fill inside. I understand that pain because I felt it too as a teenager. I hope you find some other way to express you pain, drawing, writing, singing, painting, running, something you can get lost in and is also productive. This does not include drugs and alcohol. You are loved, the only person that doesn't know that is you.

Answer 3

Finding yourself is apart of life. sometimes life is cruel you know what I'm saying! sometime it seems like you wanna kill yourself or die. but you know what...God is the answer to all your problems believe me. even if you don't know him, he will guide you and direct you to do the right things in life.

Answer 4

You choose who you will be.

Answer 5

try travelling...and learn how to spell