My 3 yr old has never spoken. What could be wrong?

Question

He's smart, can communicate perfectly non verbally, and is not autistic. He is up to speed in every area except speech. He makes noises that MIGHT sound like words if you're listening very carefully, and his hearing is perfect. Did I, or am I doing something to cause this? This is not selective mutism, because he has NEVER spoken.

Answer 1

his voice box is sensitve to stuff

Answer 2

I did the same thing, now I'm a professional with a doctorate. There may be some speech delay or some type of cognitive problem where for some reason the thoughts don't go from brain to mouth. I'd suggest you contact your local school, request an IEP and get a full assessment. The reason I say school, is because if you get it through school, under federal law, the school district pays for the treatment and therapy if necessary. Even though your little guy is not yet school age, you can still request the IEP.

Answer 3

I'll assume you have probably been worrying about this for awhile now and had your little boy checked out for alot of the things you might look for...such as hearing problems, speech problems, autism, and others.

Now I will share my own experience...I also have a 3...soon to be 4 year old son. December 20, 2005 he had some very extensive dental surgery...his front teeth were removed and many others were capped. All of this was because he had stayed on the bottle too long because he wouldn't eat solid food....he drank liquid nourishment through a bottle. Four months shy of being 3 he should have known 250-1000 words......he knew about 30. He was in Early Childhood Intervention and had a speech therapist come once a week. Like you, I knew he was very intelligent....and he tested normal or above normal in everything except speech. They sort of made me feel bad because I was not that open to teaching him sign language.....simply because I knew he could talk...and I wanted them to encourage that.

Immediately after my little boy had his dental surgery he began talking.....and he has never shut up...and I say that happily! LOL
He's a little chatterbox. I think he must have been in so much pain that it just hurt him.

I'm not saying that this is your son's problem....since he has never spoken. Just that sometimes we imagine the worst things....I know I did....and then then when they do start talking...they just take off!

I took my little boy to a neurologist....and he told me he was perfectly fine...not to worry....he said my goodness....why do they put so much pressure on little kids? Then he told me a joke....There was a little seven year old boy.....he had never spoken. One day he was at breakfast with his family...they were having oatmeal....the little boy took a bite then spit it out and said "What's wrong with this *@%&(*%&*#@&*$@ oatmeal?"
The rest of the family just stared and him with their jaws dropped.
They had never heard him speak and assumed that he couldn't.
Finally his mother regained enough composure to say...."Son...after all these years of not speaking.....and we are certainly glad you have....why would you say such a foul word....and about oatmeal of all things?" The little boy looked at his mom and said....."Well...up til now things tasted pretty good Mom."

I know...not that funny. LOL My doctor thought he was hilarious though....laughed so loud they probably heard him in the waiting room. Anyways....I really hope that if there is no physical reason for your son's speech delay it is just a matter of time.

It sounds like you are a watchful mother....so just being aware and alert is a big part of helping him. If he is making the noises....then maybe speech is coming. I don't think you did anything wrong and it sounds like you are trying to do whatever you can to help your child.

Just keep encouraging.....without pushing or fixating...GOOD LUCK!!

Answer 4

What is his doctor saying? There are different levels to autism.
There has to be something wrong if he is three and he is not talked even alittle. It maybe something that is rare. I would keep on the doctor until they give me an answer.

I would suggest you search on the internet for syndromes that may cause a child not to speak. And this will help you talk with your son's doctor. Sometimes you have force a doctor to think outside of the box. They will tell you "Oh it is nothing" and/or "Let's wait and see what happens." That is their way of getting out of saying I don't know and I don't feel like finding anything.

Then there might not be anything wrong with him. Children develope at their own pace. Just because another child started talking at a certain age doesn't mean your son will do the same. Don't blame yourself. You are doing the right thing by trying to seek out help. Good Luck to you.

Answer 5

Have your child's speech and language skills assessed by a professional. At three years old, he should be speaking in two-ten word sentences, and understood by those around him. You said he communicates perfectly non-verbally... parents can often "translate" what their child is gesturing about and get it for them without requiring a speech attempt. Do you ask him to say "more" when he wants some more milk, or do you just get it since you know what he wants? For him to use speech, he has to see that it is motivating to talk to someone. For young children, this is often when they are requesting something that only an adult can get them. That is why mealtimes are such a motivator for children with speech issues. You know he wants more macaroni and cheese, but if you go a step further and request that he ask for it (even an approximation "cheese" or whatever sound he makes that sounds like it could be the word you are looking for) you have required speech as part of the interaction. With young children, food and toys are wants that are good starting places for speech. "Oh, I see you are pointing to that truck. Do you want to play with it? Say "truck". Good saying truck, you may play with the truck." Repetition of words is vital for children this age... the more they hear the word, the more ingrained into their memory it becomes. If he says "bird", you say, "Yes, it is a bird. A big blue bird. Look at that bird's wings! That bird has blue wings." Elaborating on a new word will help your child gain more vocabulary and context to go with the new word. But, if you are always giving your child what he wants/needs without him asking for it first, you are setting up the cycle of nonverbal communication. Of course, it is good to be able to anticipate your child's needs- but you also have to allow him to ask for it himself, or what motivation does he have to use the language skills? If you are always "finishing his sentences" in a way, then he has no need to talk.
You also note that his hearing is perfect... have you actually had it tested, or just assuming that because he can hear you from down the hall that he has good hearing? Many children can hear certain sounds, but may not be able to hear others. Some children can hear deep sounds, but not the soft ones made during speech. Have your child's hearing tested by an audiologist.
Your child can receive FREE speech and language testing and services through your local school district, since he is over 3. Call your local school district office to set up an assessment. An evaluator will meet with you and your child to assess his verbal and receptive skills, and set up evaluations with a speech/language pathologist and audiologist. The earlier your child receives speech intervention, the better his results will be. The therapist will also give you many excercises to do at home to help your child along. Most of the "work" of speech therapy is done in the child's home with the parents and other family members, since your speech therapist will only be able to devote a relatively small amount of time each week with your child. So, have your child evaluated so that he can start getting the help he needs. Good luck!

Answer 6

My brother didn't speak until he was three. He never HAD to speak. He was three when my youngest sister (he's the youngest in the family) started to school. Every time my sister asked for a cookie, she got one and so did he. Every time that he wanted something, he'd point, and there were 4 or 5 pairs of hands reaching for it. So, that's one possibility.

Speak to your family doctor about referring him to an ENT. That way, he would be assessed for both the ability to hear and to speak. It's possible that he needs to see a speech therapist or a speech pathologist.

And stop blaming yourself. Unless you've consciously put a muzzle on him, you've done nothing wrong.

Answer 7

You should take your son to see a developmental pediatrician - there is nothing you are doing to cause this. A developmental pediatrician or neurologist can evaluate him and determine the best path of therapy to help him develop his speech. Its definitely not normal that a three year old hasn't spoken any words yet - its best to have him evaluated at least. Don't listen to people who will say "he's a boy, boys talk late, etc...." Early intervention is key.

Answer 8

my nephew never spoke until he was 4.after a long fight for a diagnosis he was diagnosed with dyspraxia and high spectum autism,after intense therapy (he is now 10)hes very comunicative.there are lots of really good sites on speech disorders in children.try Kennedy Kreiger Institute if your in the states or the wolfson center in the UK.It may ba that hes just not a talker but its better to know for sure

Answer 9

I believe my children all started talking early, because I talked to them often. I didn't use baby talk. I just talked to them as if I was talking to anyone else of any age and they picked up on speech very well. I do have 1 grandchild that is 3 and is not speaking. I seriously believe it's because her mom uses big words all of the time and she just can't comprehend. Talk normally to your child about anything, while doing dishes and what a task that could be. Ironing clothes, and cooking, talking about things as you are doing them, helps the child to get a visualization of what you're saying.

Answer 10

If your child does not have any health issues, I would look to his environment. My nephew did not speak until the past few months. He will be 4 in a few weeks. His problem was his sister, and too much time with overly helpful adults who wouldn't work to make him communicate. His sister was always saying "Nickie Joe wants....." , and his parents were just as bad, when he looked at something they would just hand it to him. Now he has a wonderful preschool teacher who will not let his sister speak for him, and he is actually doing better than her academically. At our private christian school we have had several students enroll after being referred by a speech therapist so the kid can spend more time with peers in a learning environment, and you wouldn't believe the improvement. Hope this helped.

Answer 11

Well, everybody learns at different paces, i didn't say "mom" until i was three. There is a possibility that he is not ready to talk, he might still be trying to figure out how to form the words. You could try reading to him everynight and it might work. Like the more words he hears the easier it is to figure how to form them, good luck for you and your son!