When I was 16 years old I dated a guy who's little brother was sleeping with his 8th grade teacher. No joke. We actually went to her house a few times. At 16 I knew it was wrong and it was weird to see them kissing or holding hands.
I think I am traumatized at the time my boyfriend and I had to pick his brother up from her house on a Saturday morning. I knocked on the door and she answered. It was me who had to go upstairs and get that kid, in his underwear, out of her bed. He was tired and it took some nagging while his teacher stood there in a robe.
Now, as an adult I look back on it and kick myself. Why did I not say something? Was I afraid to make my boyfriend mad? What about when we broke up months later? I could have said something then? Mabye I did not know what to do.
Why was I such a stupid teenager? I am 29 now and it makes me so mad to think about. And to think that she had no problem with us knowing!
What would have you done at 16? Can I forgive myself now as an adult?
2007-02-17 10:05:34 · 14 answers · asked by Triplescoop 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Listen up , if you and your bf had to pick him up at the teacher's house on a Saturday morning , then his parents must have known what he was doing since he obviously did not sleep at home . It was the parents job to do something about it , or the kid's brother and not you . OK , so you knew it was wrong but at that age you were influenced by your boyfriend . No way do I believe that at that time at your young age you would have mustered the courage to turn him and the teacher in to the authorities . Quit beating yourself up over this . You NOW have more sense and a feeling of responsibilities . Maybe you even have kids of your own . If so then build up trust so they would tell you if anything happens to them . Be assured that most folks at age 16 would go with the flow and not tell . You were not a stupid teenager . Just a normal kid that wanted to oblige a friend .
2007-02-17 10:50:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to say what anyone would have done at that age. I would forgive yourself. Guilt is a worthless emotion. You learn from your mistake and move on. Perhaps you can use your knowledge that you have gained and speak at your local high schools about this topic and encourage students to have the courage to turn in predators of this nature. AT that age we have all made mistakes such as this that we can look back at and kick ourselves for. I have made plenty such mistakes such as those. I forgive you for it why can't you?
2007-02-17 10:10:07 · answer #2 · answered by LM 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The teacher was engaging in unethical and criminal behaviour. As a teacher, she is entrusted with the care and guidance of her students. She was wrong and could have faced serious charges; in fact, if those charges were laid today, she would have to be accountable even though it happened years ago. If you feel strongly about it, why not contact an attorney. Otherwise, it probably would be best if the student who had been involved with her laid charges. Don't be hard on yourself for what happened then. You were inexperienced and a student yourself and didn't know what course of action you should take.
2007-02-17 10:12:30 · answer #3 · answered by Jo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's really sad. You're right, you probably didn't do anything because you didn't want to get anyone in trouble, especially not your boyfriend. Ideally I would have told my parents, my boyfriend's parents, and the school principal, but who knows what I would have really done if I were in that situation. Yes, you should forgive yourself, but if you're having a hard time with that you should consider seeing a therapist to help you get over this.
2007-02-17 10:10:30 · answer #4 · answered by cg17 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 16 and that is a difficult situation. I would definitely confide in my parents, and if they wanted me to do anything then I would. I doubt the teacher would listen to a kid, so an adult should be told.
2007-02-17 10:12:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
At 16, we are usually idiots. Your boyfriend and the teacher seem to have been the obvious people who should have been worried. Yes, you did something you would not do now, but you learned from it. You must accept that you made that choice, then let it go. You must learn to forgive your past actions, and then you can be happy. After all, life is about the present, not the past.
2007-02-17 10:10:08 · answer #6 · answered by without.question 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If i knew a teacher was sleeping with a student i would confirm them that is kinda wrong but i wouldn't get in the way of true love.I understand what you mean by it being disgusting seeing them together but they really liked each other.I would have just backed off.That's my opinion.
2007-02-17 10:19:53 · answer #7 · answered by sexy mama 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have told, because the teacher could have been sleeping around with other students as well, and well, there's something known as STD's. But if the boy was fine and willing and now he doesn't regret it, I thinkyou can forgive yourself. You were young as well.
2007-02-17 10:09:34 · answer #8 · answered by uh-huh 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I probably kept quiet, when I was sixteen, but what I know today it is better to tell someone that will help you and the boy that was with the teacher. Too many of this seems to be going on for years. What would you do if it was your child?
2007-02-17 10:12:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
i've got heard of rumors of the countless male instructors snoozing with some pupils. One instructor is going to events of previous pupils so as that they graduated yet nonetheless .... thats creepy.
2016-09-29 06:12:13 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋