She has often said mean stereotypes about other cultures and religions (which I do not wish to repeat) and it makes me feel uncomfortable when she says those things. She knows that I don't like it but she still says them in front of me anyway. How do I get her to stop?
2007-02-17 09:44:19 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Close friends should be able to talk about anything. But if this bothers you, you have a right to say so and ask them not to say those things around you. For example, I hate excessive cussing. A very good friend had very bad language. I didn't even have to tell him how I feel b/c he knew from when I would tell my b/f to watch his language. He caught on pretty much as soon as we met, and he would make sure to watch his mouth around me and apologized when he would get carried away. He has made an affort to stop completely and even said that he hates the way it sounds now. The thing is, I never asked him to stop and never made an issue of it when he did cuss, he did it on his own. This is a great friend. Your friend should not have to change her views b/c of you, but should respect you enough to not offend you by saying these things. Talk to her about it one last time, and if it doesn't stop, find another friend. Real friends shouldn't want to hurt each other, they should want to make you feel great about life!
2007-02-17 10:25:47 · answer #1 · answered by ejc_360 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you friends with someone like that, I wonder what he would say about me since I am Somali, so black and Muslim, and my country is both in the African union and the Arab League. I personally do not speak with people who are ignorant and I would love for him to imply that I have a lower IQ or I'm ugly just because I am black. I hope it is only because he is young that he is saying these sorts of things. I do not think he will change he will probably just not say what he really thinks in the future but he will still be racist. I do not know why you are still friends with someone like this there is a difference with racial jokes which I have with my best friend who is Brazilian and simple racism. He will never see everyone as equal if he has been conditioned to think like he does.
2016-05-23 23:43:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can really do is tell her to stop in your presence,
eg. "Blah blah racist remark"
You " insert name... I have told you what I think of racist remarks and I will remind you this one time that I do not want to hear it in my presence. I cannot change you but I am not going to subject myself to this junk. If you do not respect me enough to abide by this request then there is no need for us to hang out. I certainly have no desire to give you any support in this mean spiritedness."
If your friend continues, cut off the friendship.
It is tough, but having a back bone and standing up for what is right isn't for sissies and just by your asking about it shows you have the potential to stand up for what is right.
2007-02-17 09:54:03 · answer #3 · answered by thankyou "iana" 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Analyze the truth of the stereotype and discuss them with her..
There is often more than a grain of truth in most stereotypes...
Find out what is myth and what is based on truth...
Nothing like the cold light of truth to dispel unfounded rumors..
2007-02-17 10:39:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down with her and tell her why you don't like her saying these comments, honestly. Let her know that everyone is entitled to their own opinions, and you respect hers, but it makes you uncomfortable when she expresses them in front of you. If this doesn't work, then thoroughly consider making friends whose opinions are closer than yours. You can still be friends with this girl, but I wouldn't be too close to her. Good luck!!!
2007-02-17 09:54:27 · answer #5 · answered by piecrumz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She does it for shock effect like a child cursing. If she really feels like that she has a right to speak her mind and not be a whipped dog by the PC patrol.
However if it is really bumming you out, tell her, and if she does it walk out and mean it. It could be bad news if somebody takes offense and you get caught up in it.
2007-02-17 10:19:41 · answer #6 · answered by mitchell2020 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her to stop. Tell her clearly, directly and calmly that you are not comfortable with that sort of comment. You may have to repeat the process a number of times, but she'll get the message.
2007-02-17 09:50:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Walk away from her the next time she does it and refuse to speak to her until she comes to her senses.
She sounds like not only a racist, but a control freak by trying to force you to put up with her shenanigans.
I wouldn't be surprised if she moos and eats grass in her spare time.
2007-02-17 09:58:44 · answer #8 · answered by castle h 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try reiterating to her that you ont think that what she is saying is cool. She may just be trying to be funny, but she is actuaaly sounding like a pompus idiot.... And suggest she actually speak and get to know the people that she is insulting. Racial jokes may sometimes be fun but when people start to get offened then it must stop.
2007-02-17 09:52:54 · answer #9 · answered by stunna3m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try asking her why she feels the way she does. ultimately we can't change the way our friends think but we can try to educate them and influence their thinking. once she matures and associates more with individuals of the particular race or religion then her views may change. Until then try not to acknowledge her negative thinking as much as possible.
2007-02-17 09:55:16 · answer #10 · answered by Divine_10 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋