My ex boyfreind who cheated on me has asked to go back out with me again, he says he's changed and that he still loves me and wants to be back in a serious relationship with me again. i had a massive arguement with my mm about it because she says that guys like him never change, but eventally she told me to do what i want and she will try to get along with him if thats what i want. My problem is that i actually cant decide what i want. i know it sounds silly and childish but i cant tel if he has changed and i dont want to make the wrong decision. has anyone ever got back with an ex who has cheated on them in the past, if so how did it go?
2007-02-17 03:39:39 · 12 answers · asked by Claire g 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell him you like him...but the fact that he cheated on you really hurt...and even though you care about him you still have a trust issue and it will take time to see if he has really changed for you to re-develop the trust you once had in him....I'm sure he will understand...cause if it was the reverse he would feel the same...and you should tell him that too. Don't make a quick decision but take it slow make him earn your attention and trust again...if he's not welling to do that then he will prove to you hes not a keeper.. good luck!
2007-02-17 03:48:15 · answer #1 · answered by sporty_kitten 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh wow. that really hits straight to home base for me. I had a boyfriend once that really really was in love with me. but I heard he cheated on me with another girl. I didnt even know and he keeped calling saying he would change and that he was sorry. Do you know that saying "a cheater always a cheater" well that sometimes is true and sometimes not. My mom did the same thing to me telling me not to get back together with him. but your mom is only doing that cause she doesnt want to see you get hurt. She is not the one going to be dating him you are. And sometimes other people can see something in a person and you cant.
Making a dection is hard even when you think in your mind and in your heart he might not change. But I say everyone should get a second change. My boyfriend I gave a second change and know look at me I'm Happiely married. I dont know anything about your boyfriend. But you do. You know what makes him mad, sad, happy and so forth. If he really says his changed give him a chance to really see if he really did or If his just all about talk and no walk.
You can only decide for yourself. see what he does different and what he does the same.
ask yourself some questions
Do I really like this guy.
Is he a lier and no walk or does he know what he has infornt of him.
Honey your an amazing beautiful talented girl that has a lot of things going for you. If he doesnt change. Then the 3rd time around he wont. Guys are kids they dont know what they want.
Their stupid. They have something so great. Then they lose it by doing something so stupid. Then they sit at home trying to figuer out what they just did and why. They start seeing what they had infront of them.
Honey your young. This is a great lesson to see what you like and what you dont like out of a guys. Its good to date around that way you know what kind of guy your looking for.
See what happens give him a second chance. Tell him if he really truly loves you as he say he does. He would stay ture and not cheat or lie or do anything to hurt. you. If he does want to cheat. Tell him there is not going be be anymore chances and the next time he cheats is not going to be on you
2007-02-17 12:20:30 · answer #2 · answered by allie laught alot 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say to be alone for a few days and really think about this. Do u deserve to be with someone who cheats on u? If he really cares for u then why did he cheat? I just think u need to think this over and make the right decision for urself but remember not to except others to treat u wrongly. Know u deserve the best,we all do. Go with ur gut feeling and I hope it works out right for u. God bless you.
2007-02-17 11:51:40 · answer #3 · answered by bunny k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well ok..umm usually once a cheater always a cheater but i have witnessed some relationships that someone has cheated on the other person and then seriously changed so thats always possible...if ur friends with any other person he has dated try talkin to them to see if he cheated on them too because if he has then huney hes not worth it he wont change then..but u love him and he loves u he should be able to try his hardest to change..but if hes nto willin to do somethin in return other than cheat then move on...but i hope everythin works out...
~*~Katie~*~
2007-02-17 12:04:36 · answer #4 · answered by Katlyn C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you don't take him back without question shows you don't trust him. Trust is a fragile thing and he crushed yours. You won't last if let him back in because you'll always be wondering where he is or where he's been and your relationship will be miserable. Move on Honey. And if he has changed he can prove it later with his next girlfriend. Good Luck
2007-02-17 11:50:53 · answer #5 · answered by blastabuelliac 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have. Let me tell you ... DON'T DO IT!!!!! They never change! The always say they have really changed and can't live without you blah blah and you begin to believe it and they actually act different at first but once they have you back they go back to their old ways! DON'T DO IT!!!! save yourself the heartache now! Once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater. It's a character flaw they can't change!
2007-02-17 11:53:30 · answer #6 · answered by ChristinaN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I don't know but I do belive in second chances. You can give him one more chance but if he cheats on you again don't be afraid to tell him that he is history. Tell him about it. Make sure his isn't being a liar. If he is remember what I said.
2007-02-17 11:47:33 · answer #7 · answered by Loaha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i got back together with mine. he broke up with me 3 days before xmas, then xmas eve he texted me saying how he wants me back and how that was a huge mistake. he even bought me a promise ring for xmas (weve been living together since sept). a month later i found out he was still talking to that girl and they even went out for a few hours at night ( i told him if he wants me back he wont talk to her). but like a stupid idiot i took him back agian. its always in the back of my mind but if u truely love him and if he is worth the pain then take him back. just know that you will prob be questioning him a lot...
2007-02-17 11:47:06 · answer #8 · answered by kim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes and no it did not change just got worse. once a cheat always a cheat.
2007-02-17 11:49:20 · answer #9 · answered by bette69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don`t matter what I or you mom say cause you like that loser but for sure he just don`t have nobody to have sex but he can have it ease with you so in the future you will hurt yourself for somebody who do not deserve it but as I said if you like him don`t matter cause humans they are stupid when they have feelings but hey good luck My advice No No nonononoq!!!!!!
2007-02-17 11:46:43 · answer #10 · answered by sinner so what ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋