My Height is 5 ft, weatish colour my freinds say that i have a good face features and good smile. My husband is noth that good looking he is 5.2 ft, Dark & little fat. But i dont have any issue about his looks. I love him a lott. we had an arrange marriage. My husband loves his mother a lot i too respect her. but am scared my husband will feel bad if i tell him about this. But i cant bear this criticism as it hurts me a lot & decreases my confidence. Am trying my best to be good to her & respect her inspite of this.what to do??
2007-02-16 17:43:36 · 22 answers · asked by blossom 4 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Be truthful to yourself and you mother in law, and if that don't work ask your husband what to do tell him what she said or did to you and let him decide what to do.
2007-02-23 16:43:10 · answer #1 · answered by Mistical 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're an adult. Is there a reason that you cannot express yourself as an adult. You can be assertive and stand up for yourself and still be respectful. As long as you allow yourself to be bullied you will seem weak to her. She will continue to abuse you and your marriage will begin to suffer no matter how much you love your husband. I know that she is not perfect. Give her a taste of her own medicine. His mother has a bit of jealousy over how good you look. It is the foundation of her attacks and she wants to make you feel less than you are and you are letting her. She doesn't do this in front of your husband because she knows better. You should discuss this with him too and tell him whats happening. By not saying anything you're hiding something very essential to the stability of your marriage from him. Mother in law is envious and a coward.
2007-02-16 17:58:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell her straight up. This was an arranged marriage. So you picked me for your son. If you didn't like the way I looked then why did you pick me. Tell her your doing the best you can to be the best wife for her son and he isn't all that. That is all that counts is that you and your husband like each other. You don't sleep with his mother. You don't have to impress her either. She's lucky to have you as a daughter in law. She just needs someone to let her know that.
2007-02-23 18:35:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rent the movie Monster In Law, she is being rude and being one of the worst kinds of bitches there are. The kind that are all nice around other people but a snide and sinister when they have you alone. Don't listen to her tell her that you are quite content with the way you look and tell her that true beauty like you have comes from within, Maybe she should think about. You don't let this wicked ***** bother you be happy with who you are and realize that she is bitter and you are her sons wife so she just needs to get used to that because you are now the woman of the man that she calls son.
2007-02-24 17:14:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, perhaps she's trying to drive a wedge between you &
ur husband. Tell him. And if he doesn't respect you enough to
confront her, and tell her to stop, then he's a wussy. He needs
to come to your defense. Plus, I would tell her to go take a good
look in the mirror, she has alot of wrinkles. Plan on what you
will say....before you see her. Be ready to say something back.
You cannot truly have peace,...with a woman like that. Unless,
she is willing to change her ways. Some people are just plain
TOXIC . And you have to keep your distance. Good Luck.
2007-02-16 18:13:51 · answer #5 · answered by CraZyCaT 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure where you are from, but here in the USA, we would not take this issue to our spouse, we would take it directly to the mother-in-law, seeing that she is the one being critical.
If you can, inform her that God does not make junk. You were created in a special way, and you are going to look the way you do, because that is how it was meant to be. Also explain that it is rude to criticize the looks of others because it hurts peoples feelings, and if she were truly wise, as she should be, she would realize this. And ask her politely to cease with the comments because she is being hurtful.
As for your "confidence", you needn't allow it to decrease. There is nothing wrong with you. You are unique and special to God, He made you. He does not make mistakes. You remember that.
Best wishes.
2007-02-16 17:51:04 · answer #6 · answered by C J 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time your mother in law starts criticizing your looks, be very calm and nice and tell her that your husbands doesn't complain about how you look and you like the way look and if she doesn't have something nice to say about your looks your would prefer to say nothing at all anymore.
2007-02-16 18:15:54 · answer #7 · answered by Dyan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps she is not as good looking as you are and is as such jealous or envious of your looks.Please ask her what does she expect you to do and improve your looks and how can she help you in that. Praise her looks and suggest improvements for her too without being critical. May be she will change in a short time. Stay positive and cheerful and do not take her negative comments seriously at all !
2007-02-23 19:41:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you feel that you can't bear it anymore then quietly tell him and when you do tell him that it is a private conversation and you are just expressing how you feel to him and tell him how much you love and respect his mother...The next time she says something hurtfull just listen to in and then ignore it that is the easiest thing to do without having a confrontation which will be ugly to all parties involved...hope this helps.
2007-02-16 17:54:12 · answer #9 · answered by Jane_Doe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would let your mother-in-law know that you are thankful that you and your husband love each other for who you are and not what you each look like. Next time she says something, just reply back..."Your son appreciates me just the way I am, and I appreciate him just the way he is." Or just smile and simply say "Thank you" very politely. People usually won't know how to take that. It sounds like she would be like that with anyone that her son ended up marrying...like she is losing her "little boy".
2007-02-16 18:28:20 · answer #10 · answered by sassy_395 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a beautiful person to me, beauty is only skin deep, your Mother in law is jealous of the relationship you and your husband have you do need to tell him about this just like you have in this yahoo questions. He can speak to his Mother without hurting anyone. But he needs to let her know it is not OK to talk to his wife the way she talks to you.
2007-02-22 17:10:14 · answer #11 · answered by sunshine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋