How do I get my guy to use condoms?

Question

I just had our second baby 3 months ago and I am breastfeeding so I am on this birth control pill that is really picky and I have to take it at the exact same time everyday or it don't work. While I have been taking as I am supposed to I am still worried about getting pregnant again. We are not ready for another child yet, if ever, but he does not want to use condoms. He just keeps telling me it will be ok and don't worry. Is there anything else I can do to keep from getting pregnant?

Answer 1

Just tell him "No condom, no sex." That ought to get a raincoat on that guy faster than a Ferrari can go from 0 to 60.

Answer 2

im totally in agreement with everyone else. no condom, no sex. sex with a condom might not be as great, but its still great, you know? he will get the idea pretty soon after you refuse a few nights (or weeks, depending on how much he wants some) in a row.

you have the power to make sure he has it.

make it into part of your foreplay. you put it on him, instead of having it be routine and overly processed. play with him, maybe even lick and such (i feel dirty just writing that! haha.. but seriously, it will make him happier to have it being put on if you and your mouth are right there)
putting a drop or two of lube (the warming kind works best for this) in the condom will help with the feeling. it will make it feel more natural.

and look for condoms that are "ultra sensitive" to help with the persuasion. just stay away from the ribbed ones.. at least, unless you are a fan. i find they arent very.... good.

if you want, maybe you should check into spermicides or a female condom or a cervical cap.
there is also the nuva ring, but that turned me into a raving lunatic b***h. it was awful! i wanted to kill everyone, it felt like. so i quit that after 2 months. but i know people who swear by it.

or you can start charting your periods and use it to figure out when youre ovulating.
if you can afford it, there is something called the ladycomp that is amazing. its a few hundred dollars, but it takes your basal temperature and it can tell you each day if you are able to get pregnant or not. charting is a really good tool to use. just dont have sex up to 7 days before your ovulation and two days after.

but if your guy wont go for holding out that long, hand him the condom box!
:)

good luck!

Answer 3

I personally wouldn't take the pill while breastfeeding (I know you're on the one that's supposed to be fine with bf'ing, but still...). I would consider an IUD (what my midwife reccommends), or insist on condoms. He's got to be prepared to be responsible unless he wants another kid. I just had this discussion with my husband last night and he said he could get 'snipped', which I appreciate. Although there is a doctor who does 'no scalpel vasectomies', so it's not even getting snipped! As far as I know, it is reversible, so if you ever do decide to have more kids in the future...

Your hormones are crazy enough as it is after pregnancy and with breastfeeding, give yourself a break from more hormonal stuff!

Answer 4

You could refuse to have sex until he starts wearing one. Or you cold try a spermicide gel or diaphragm. I was breastfeeding and on the pill when I fell pregnant a third time and we didnot want anymore so I understand how you feel. It can happen.

FYI : despite not wanting more children we would have loved a third child just as much but pregnancy ended up being ectopic. The doctoor told us that being on the pill that allows you to breastfeed also increases the chance of ectopic pregnancy if you do happen to conceive.

Answer 5

Say honestly, after dinner, upfront,

"I do worry, and I always will. The pill doesn't suit me, and I don't want to get pregnant again. Use a condom, now. OK, here's one, if you are too lazy to consider my health."

"If you make a fuss or take a mistress, I'll leave you."

Or choose a dialogue?

"Don't doubt me. When I invited you to become one of our family, I knew that you were aware of your adult obligations. If you had prostate cancer, I would still love you and be faithful to you, and I know you mean to honour me in the same way. Otherwise we'd only live together until one of us got bored or infected."

"Goodnight, I'm sleeping in the guest room. When our child cries, we can take turns to painfully breastfeed her."

"Hi, my real name is ______. I am considering paying you to manage our divorce. This is my budget. What are my options? What are your rates?"

"I can't stand to tell you why we split up. I can't even talk right now, because I can only afford one room, and my four children are screaming at me. If you were any kind of friend you would be here to babysit."

"Yes, I was always a loyal wife. I have no idea why he didn't grow up, but as his mother, you should know. Maybe you forgot to tell him about the real facts of life."

Answer 6

How about using a female condom or the vaginal contraceptive film or the today sponge. Any birth control pill you use has to be taken at the same time every day so it is not just the pill you are on. Have you considered an IUD? There is also contraceptive foam and suppositories you can use or a diaphragm.

Answer 7

Don't have sex with him unless he uses a condom. As far as not worrying a out getting pregnant. I got pregnant while on the pill taken as I was suppose to. So it happens. I'm sure he will come around if you stand your ground.

Answer 8

It's real simple. You got the candy jar, he wants the candy. Keep the lid on the jar until he puts a glove on.

He is like a fireman walking into a burning building without a suit. Not very smart. I think you should consider shopping the gene pool a little more.

Answer 9

A trick a friend of mine used: She put the condom into her mouth and went down on him. He was wearing it before he knew what was happening! And then she got on top of him for the ride and after this he no longer had a chance to take it off. Ha ha!

Answer 10

tell him u wont sleep with him unless he puts one on because U are the one who is carrying the baby for 9mths and U are the one who looks after the children majority of the time. So unless he can figure out to do all of that for u u wont sleep with him.