I want read some funny quotes just for fun, long or short. The funniest gets 10 points.
2007-02-16 10:46:13 · 13 answers · asked by daydream♥believer 4 in Education & Reference ➔ Quotations
If at first you don't succed, look in the trash for the instructions.
Jesus is coming, hide the porn.
Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.
Do not meddle in the afairs of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
okay, okay, i take it back... un-f*ck you.
Fasten your seatbelt. it makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car.
Keep the earth clean, it's not uranus!
and my personal motto:
I do whatever my rice crispies tell me.
2007-02-16 14:47:46 · answer #1 · answered by DishclothDiaries 7 · 13⤊ 1⤋
ONE REASON NOT TO MESS WITH A KID
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow
a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reliterated that a whale could not swallow a
human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
Just thought it was cute... heard it on a radio...
2007-02-16 21:54:44 · answer #2 · answered by TabbieKat Loves You MUCH 3 · 31⤊ 1⤋
My pockets hurt -- Homer Simpson
2007-02-16 18:49:46 · answer #3 · answered by a heart so big 6 · 6⤊ 2⤋
Of all the things I have lost , its my mind I miss the most
2007-02-16 20:36:06 · answer #4 · answered by deedubya 5 · 5⤊ 2⤋
"No man has ever been shot by his wife while doing the dishes."
*I like "Katie"'s Answer the best! Too funny!
2007-02-16 19:03:45 · answer #5 · answered by Cochran 6 · 3⤊ 4⤋
From the movie Airplane:
"Surely you can't be serious"
"Yes I'm serious, and don't call me Shirley."
"Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop (insert vice, smoking, sniffing glue, etc.)"
"I can make a hat, a brooch, or a flying teradactyl."
and of course the old white lady, "I can speak jive."
2007-02-16 18:56:37 · answer #6 · answered by exericy 3 · 3⤊ 7⤋
1.I feel more like I do now then I did when I got here.
2.A preposition is something you should never end a sentence with.
2007-02-16 18:57:51 · answer #7 · answered by bizeyman 2 · 1⤊ 6⤋
Uhh. It smells like a skunk that came out of the 'ars' of another skunk.
2007-02-16 18:53:35 · answer #8 · answered by mayomay7 2 · 1⤊ 7⤋
I HAVE A** & HEART PROBLEMS, WHEN I SIT ON MY A** , I DONT HAVE THE HEART TO GET UP!!!
2007-02-16 18:50:52 · answer #9 · answered by Meggan P 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
"You can pick your nose. You can pick your friends. But, you can't pick your friend's nose" - I have no idea who came up with it.
2007-02-16 18:49:59 · answer #10 · answered by j;eaojtoig;45jho;54ihu;45hujt54 6 · 11⤊ 3⤋