My girlfriend's friend invited her son and her to a birthday party. What i'm asking is if since i am the boyfriend, i can just go with. is it assumed that if you invite one person from a couple that the other one will probably go too? she believes not. I say however. its our weekend day, its fair to assume we will be together. If the tables were turned, i feel that i would just bring her because she is with me. we are a package deal. if im going, she can come if she wants. right or wrong please be honest because i want to know if i am out of line.
2007-02-16 10:27:46 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I think ... you want her to want you to go but thats not the indication you're getting from her and it bothers you that she's not making more of the issue in your favor on her own.... maybe becasue this is something she wants and needs to do without you... all couples need a certain amount of space.
2007-02-16 10:31:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot bring your own friends at someone else's party. The fact that 100 people are expected does not change anything. Think, every one is coming by invitation - it was listed as private. If all brought a friend - because it doesn't matter - you would have 200 hundred people.- possibly a brawl and invitations would have been useless. Your friend chose that number of guests for a reason. If you seriously fear being creeped out, well then you should stay home where you will feel safe.
2016-03-28 23:09:04 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not necessarily out of line but I can see your point. You should ask your significant other if she could find out. Dont freak out if you are not invited however, I think that most people would include a couple as a package deal in an invitation. If you are invited be sure to bring an acceptable gift, if not dont make a federal case out of it-its not worth the fight you'll get into over it.
There will be timeswhen a woman doesnt need the man around and vice versa. Its not a question about not loving each other or not wanting to be with each other. It's just that sometimes the women will want to do girly things with her friends and we do our manly things. PLease believe me when I tell you that you DO NOT want to make this a source of friction between you two.
2007-02-16 10:40:19 · answer #3 · answered by molly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless an invitation to an event is specifically addressed to both people, or to one person and includes "and date" in the invitation, then the invite only applies to the person who it is directed to. If you just go, assuming that you're included, that is an etiquette felony.
Your girlfriend needs to call the person who issued the invite to ask if she can bring a date. Be prepared for the answer to be "no."
The person who issued the invitation might have had a reason for not including you: she may have only a limited budget for the party and can't afford to have everyone bring a date. Possibly she doesn't know you very well, or assumes that you wouldn't be interested in the party if you don't know other people. Whatever, don't just show up uninvited. If going to the party is an issue, ask your girlfriend to call and politely ask if you can attend. (If money is an issue, have her offer to pay for your attendance.)
That
2007-02-16 11:07:38 · answer #4 · answered by Karin C 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU absolutely were NOT invited. If so, it would have said " And boyfriend, or and guest".
That being said. your significant other can call to see if you are able to attend. If they so no, the two of you must sit down and figure out what you will do.
It might have been an oversight but i think not. Perhaps there was a reason you weren't invited and you should ask your gf why you were not included.
Make sure all concerned with this decision agree to have you at the party.
I was regularly and systematically denied access to parties and gatherings of my gf, because her family is highly anti semitic. They are neocons and racists. In time, i was glad NOT to be included, and now, my gf wants nothing to do with them because she alone of all family members had been targeted for many things and my long time gf finally saw the light.
You, if not invited, do something special for yourself, which does not include cheating., Go to a poetry reading, open mic music, and clean out her closet or something nice for her.
2007-02-16 10:38:14 · answer #5 · answered by Legandivori 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the kind of party it is. If it is a birthday party for children (hence the son being invited), then you are probably not invited as space is generally limited to children and one parent. If it is the friend's birthday, then you can probably go--just be sure to bring a gift.
However, since your girlfriend says that you aren't invited, then you aren't invited either way. She does know her friend better than you, and she probably knows her friend would have specified all invitees.
2007-02-16 10:33:09 · answer #6 · answered by Esma 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The friend who invited your girlfriend may not have known about her relationship status. If she does know, then your girlfriend should ask if it's okay for you to come along too. Normally, I would say that unless you're specifically invited you shouldn't go. You can always choose another day to spend with your sweetie and make her feel special.
2007-02-16 10:33:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's best to ask. In my opinion, if the gf's friend didn't mention you, chances are you're not invited. It's not a package deal. Your girlfriend is her own person.
I invited a person to my baby shower and she invited her boyfriend. I wasn't too happy with that. I knew they were dating, but I never mentioned he was invited. If you want someone else to go along, always ask is it ok first. That's the proper way to do it.
2007-02-16 10:38:28 · answer #8 · answered by mymymissmai 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
let this be an eye opener of what to expect when you are either "me or we", it's probably no big deal. if it's her friend, maybe she just wants your girlfriend and her child to attend. you didn't provide enough information, but this is probably just one of those little things that might get blown out of proportion. let her go with the kid, and just meet up later. best case scenario, her friend might not know you that well along with the other guests and the want to be loose amongst themselves and not worry what you might think. worst case scenario, maybe she just wants some space which includes the weekend time you have with each other.
cut her some slack, let her go. once you let her a little, the phone will start ringing and she'll be wondering why you aren't around. who knows, this might be one of those gajillion tests that women have to see how you react.
play it cool and just see what happens. bottom line, not much you can do anyway, so just give her the time she wants with family and friends, in time, you will be asked why you aren't around. trust me
2007-02-16 10:37:48 · answer #9 · answered by gonzo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends. If the person asking said you could bring a guest or your SO, then it's ok. If the person didn't specify than you should go alone (it's tacky and impolite to ask if you can bring a guest).
The party giver may only have so much food, a limited budget, etc., and cannot accommodate extra people.
Also, do not assume you can just bring someone. This could strain your friendship with the person (for reasons stated in my 2nd paragraph).
2007-02-16 10:32:24 · answer #10 · answered by Misty Eyes 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're missing the point. It's not about common courtesy, or about how far invitations extend. Your girlfriend is telling you this because she doesn't want you to go. She probably just wants to spend a day with her kid, so don't take it too personally, but that's what that is.
2007-02-16 10:39:00 · answer #11 · answered by Beardog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋