ok my dad tells me things becuz he trusts me and he tells me not to telll anyone escpecially mom... but mom asks all the time but i dont want to lie to her or brake my promise with dad wat do i DO?
2007-02-16 06:24:54 · 16 answers · asked by sierrasaysyo 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Tell your mom! If its info about your mom, your mom has a right to know. Your dad is probably telling you lies and doesnt want your mom to find out because then he knows he will be in the wrong.
Tell your mom things and tell your dad things.
2007-02-16 06:28:33 · answer #1 · answered by Encouragement 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
You need to have a straight up conversation telling your Dad that you cannot be his confidant, and that you want him to stop putting you in a position of keeping secrets from anyone, (including and especially your Mom), because it's not fair to you. Their divorce is between him and your Mom, and you are the one stuck in the middle. Maybe he thinks that by telling you things, he is somehow easing his own guilty conscious, and hoping your loyalty will be toward him. Either way, what he is doing is wrong. Tell him to get a clue, that these are the very things that make divorce so difficult for the children, no matter what age, because they feel like their loyalty has to be divided. I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I know first hand how you must feel.
2007-02-16 06:38:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, your dad needs to grow up and not put you in the middle of his and your mothers problems. That is not being very adult about the whole situation. If it makes you uncomfortable then just tell dad that you would rather him not talk about your mother that way or tell you secrets about her. Sounds to me like he is trying to get you on his side rather than your mothers! My father tried to do the same thing...watch out...the gifts for no reason should start coming soon!
2007-02-16 06:29:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell both of them that from now on, you don't want to hear anything about their relationship. Then when he starts talking, interrupt him and say "I'm sorry, I know you need to talk, but can we change the subject please?" I know exactly how you feel because my dad STILL talks about my mom and they've been divorced more than 25 years. But, maybe unlike your situation, if I cut my dad off, he wouldn't talk to me EVER. He is mental, I think. Anyway, I sympathize, but please, don't believe what he says. There really is two sides to every relationship and he is just trying to drive a wedge between you and your mom.
2007-02-16 07:15:20 · answer #4 · answered by TPhi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time your father starts telling you something you think is "crossing the line" stop him and tell him that you love him but he is putting you in a very uncomfortable position. He needs to find someone else to talk to, you are not to right person. He should hopefully be so blown away by your maturity and sensibility that he will realize his fault and you will not have to worry about it anymore.
2007-02-16 06:36:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to explain to both of your parents that you would appreciate it if they didn't do things that leave you stuck in the middle of their issues, and that includes telling your dad to quit telling you information he doesn't want you to tell your mom and telling your mom to stop asking about things your father has said. Your father can't expect you to lie to your mother, and your mother can't rely on you to be her source of information about your father. It's not fair to you.
2007-02-16 06:56:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father should not be putting you in this position. What happens between he and your mother should stay between them. He's putting you in the middle. You are both of theirs and you should love and respect both of them. Don't break any promises, just tell your dad that you don't want to be put in the middle of them.
2007-02-16 06:54:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your dad has no right to tell you things that you aren't allowed to tell your mom. Tell him that you don't feel comfortable keeping secrets from your mom and he needs to stop.
2007-02-16 06:53:42 · answer #8 · answered by Esma 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is your parents problem. you should tell your dad that you dont feel comfortable lying to your mother and when he puts you in that postion it is really hard and not fair to you. and tell your mom that if she wants to know what your dad does to ask him, she will be hurt by this but explain you dont want to be in the middle of them and there problems. They probably dont even reliaze they are doing this to you. explain to them how you feel and its not fair for them to treat you that way.
2007-02-16 06:30:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell your dad to stop doing this!! It is so wrong for him to put you in the middle and expect you to lie to your mom.
2007-02-16 06:29:14 · answer #10 · answered by Stuck in the middle of nowhere 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋