my communication skills seem inadequate. how can i improve them?

Question

i don't know if this happens to lots of people but i definitely seem to find it difficult to say what i want to say without getting misunderstood or not understood at all.i don't have an issue with language or vocabulary. it is just about timing and getting the right words. Because of this problem, i sometimes end up looking like a fool and it gets very embarassing.i do ok while writing stuff but while speaking, i can't wait to run away from people because it is so stressful to talk.
does this happen to others too, or am i a special case with a crazy problem? any tips on how i can handle this problem without going to expensive communication skill classes.

Answer 1

u probably have social anxiety disorder
work on ur self-esteem
those people aren't better than you!!!!!!!!

Answer 2

I think its just nerves. This does not mean you're crazy. I get my words twisted sometimes when I get nervous, usually when I have to speak in front of people or interview someone. I forget important details that I wanted to say, basically there have been times when my mind has gone blank, and I've felt like a fool too! The ony thing I can say is that you have to just keep doing it. If you try to avoid communicating with people, you will just be even more nervous when you HAVE to do it. I just remind myself that they are just people, no different than I am when it comes down to it. Another way I deal is to act like I am confident even when I'm not. I am often still nervous, but I notice that a lot of times once the ice is broken and I relax, things turn out just fine! Plus, especially when it comes to public speaking, people won't eveb realize that I was nervous!!!

Answer 3

I'd agree about going to Toastmasters, it helps a lot! The cool thing about toastmasters is that you get practice speaking in a safe environment!

I'm imagining that you are an introvert and so probably listen better than you speak. That's fine! Use your strength, listening. Practice will make improvement too, and try to find safe people to practice with!

Answer 4

This sounds like you are an adolescent with sexual tension. Turn that tension onto an avenue of challenge such as the weather channel, Political science, Or be creative in striking up conversation on interesting subjects you have knowledge of. Stop masturbating, it make your palms sweat and creates social insecurity

Answer 5

Toastmasters, Dale Carnegie, or similar would help you.

There is never anything wrong with pausing before you speak, there shouldn't be the expectation of a rapid-fire conversation.

Listen - then think - then speak. It can be as simple as putting your thoughts on paper, and with practice it gets much, much better.

Answer 6

*You probably should speak with your Dr. about referring you to a specialist who diagnoses dyslexia. That condition has some of the problems you describe. There are also other medical conditions, such as early Alzheimer's which would qualify. Best to check it out.

*I am not a Dr. I just read a lot.

Answer 7

Listen, don't speak.

Observe people that you find to be eloquent and witty. What are they doing that you aren't?

Check out Toastmasters they are probably up your alley.
http://www.toastmasters.org/

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. " Mark Twain

Answer 8

ayudante, your not alone. In my mind I can have it down to perfect que. When I open my mouth it all comes out wrong. Good question! Good luck on the answer..

Answer 9

stop. think about what u are going to say....then say it. i have the same problem sometimes. talk to people u know well about semi serious topics and see where that gets u.