my partner has a tickling fetish. i'm a very-very ticklish person and the tought of being tickled kills me.
the last time he tickled me, i was tied up to a bed and fell into a nervous breakdown.
during the days i was having palpitations and the doctor said that i should avoid the rush to prevent a worse thing from happening.
i love him very much but i don't know if i can survive another session of this torture.
i don't want him to go with another girl or something.
what should i do?
2007-02-16 04:59:54 · 5 answers · asked by velly z 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have a tickling fetish so I can speak from experience. I prefer being the tickler and I enjoy tying by ticklee to the bed.
In your case, I think what you have on your hands is a communication problem.
You should let him know that the intense tickling session was really detrimental to your health. You should put clear boundries as to how much tickling is acceptable and only under conditions you feel comfortable with. Being tied up to a bed and being tickled into a nervous breakdown pretty much has no boundries. You are letting him go as far as he wants.
I would suggest maybe trying to control your ticklishness better by trying to hold out while being tickled lightly and WITHOUT bondage. Spend some time together tickling playfully. You can spend a session just on a foot for instance. Then move to another body part. You can slowly increase your resistance and at the same time I think your partner would enjoy it. Also, tickle him. If he is not ticklish, I recommend you look for a spot. The right pressure in the right place and you should get some reactions.
Use a 'safeword' that invariably means STOP. This must be respected at all times. If he can't accept that then he will not respect you in other much more important ways. Make this clear to him.
If you cannot stand being tickled at all and you really, really hate it, then I think there is little hope for your relationship. Tickling is an important part of my relationship and I do not consider myself to be on the extreme end of this fetish. My wife thinks its a little wierd but she goes along with it because she knows how important it is to me. If a tickle fetishist doesn't have that stimulous, I think 9 out of 10 times the relationship must fail.
Good luck. As a ticklephile I really hope you find a way to open yourself to tickling. I know many non ticklephiles who have "converted" despite incredibly intense ticklishness. I wish that you and your partner are that fortunate.
2007-02-19 08:53:48 · answer #1 · answered by Gorgo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The easy answer would be to say that you two are just not a match. Even if he were willing to give up any hope of his ultimate satisfaction, would you really be able to accept knowing that you were depriving him of what he desperately wanted and needed?
You could presumably both try very hard to find some other activity you could both enjoy and try to make it as good for him as tickling, but it doesn't seem incredibly likely to succeed if he really has a fetish. It's possible, but somehow, if he could tickle you into a nervous breakdown and not stop before he went too far, he may not be the sort of person who could adopt such a line of conduct with success.
2007-02-18 04:10:41 · answer #2 · answered by giggledude 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only do what also makes you happy. If there's no real pleasure in that torture, then you should NOT continue with it. If he would actually leave you just because you don't share his opinion on something (liking the tickle fetish) then you're honestly better without him. A guy who doesn't care for your thoughts and doesn't respect your opinions is NOT a guy worth sticking around with.
Be open about it with him, don't be aggressive about it and put him on the defensive for what he likes, but let him know you're not into it, you openly tried to like it- but you just don't. He should be very happy you even were open-minded to try it in the first place.
2007-02-18 17:06:48 · answer #3 · answered by Michelle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should only do what you feel happy to consent to in any relationship, and you health is a very good reason to give it a miss. Maybe see if there is a compromise and you can tickle him!
2007-02-17 02:05:48 · answer #4 · answered by jammydodger 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have recently blossomed. They have all three noticed you and are flirting with you in hopes you will notice them too. #1 - was a jerk, probable still is. Just nicer to you. #2 - Your best friend has a grudge for a reason. I would talk to her about him and respect her experience. Sounds like he is worse than #1. #3 sounds like the best of the three. If he has recently noticed you but was sweet before, that is a good thing. Check him out. He is probably the keeper.
2016-05-24 07:04:45 · answer #5 · answered by Kathy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋