Wedding Location?

Question

Maybe you can tell me if i'm wrong.

My boyfriend and I have been together for seven years. We finally decided to get married. The reason we waited so long is because he has been dealing with a custody issue that finally got resolved in our favor. I have been there for him in every way I can think of. I never ask for anything, always pay my share of the bills and give more when he is short. I take on a lot and never ask for anything in return.

I told him I want to get married in my home town so both of our families can be there. On the East Coast.

Now he is like, why do we have to get married there, what about our friends out here. I basically told him to give me this one thing. I'm not asking for a big engagement ring or anything. I just want to get married with our family around. If friends are real friends they will come to the East Coast right???

Tell me if i'm wrong.

Answer 1

You're absolutely right. People fly out for weddings all the time. I am originally from St. Croix, and I'm going back there to get married with the patriarch of my family present, and those invited are flying down there as well.

If you are only asking for this one thing, he should be able to give you that. Especially if the number of people on the East Coast that you want present outweighs the number of people on the West Coast that would have to fly out.

Contrary to popular belief, the wedding is pretty much about the bride. The groom is really only asked to show up on time and look nice. You've gone through a lot of drama for him. Assert your point and stand your ground.

Buena suerte!

Answer 2

The custom of marrying at the home of the bride has always caused problems. A lot of times even the groom's family has had the financial burden of getting to the wedding site, which seems only fair since the bride's family pays for the wedding.
But times are changing & the wedding site isn't always the norm anymore.

You could have the wedding on the East coast. You could also have the wedding at a mid point between the two cities. You could also have the wedding on the East coast and then have a ring ceremony before a reception where your friends live.

There is a solution; you & your fiance just need to sit down & calmly discuss this & come up with something that works for the two of you & your families.

Good luck.

Answer 3

if people dont want to fly out to the east coast for the wedding have a reception when you get back home. and invite those who couldnt afford to fly out or who wouldnt be able to because of work or small children they would love to be included in anyway and on the invitation include that you will be married on the east coast earlier so they know about it. my brother is having a small family wedding in kansas city and then a big reception on the east coast so everyone can be there and nobody cares that theyre not invited to the actual wedding as long as they get included in celebrating your big day

Answer 4

You're right. I think you should honor your family before you honor your friends and have the wedding on the East Coast. If your friends are true friends, they will make every effort to come to the wedding. If they can't make it, I'm sure you can have a mini-celebration when you get back.

Try talking to his family, maybe they can convince him to have the wedding on the East Coast.

Answer 5

Get married with your family around. Family is forever and he should give you this. You can invite friends too.

You can always get married again - just have a reception where you live, so your friends that couldnt go east can attend that.

After all, the celebration of your love is what counts!

Answer 6

I always believed that traditionally, the man is supposed to come to the woman. Not only is your family on the East Coast, his is also. I think you are completely fair and rational. If your friends truly want to enjoy the moment, they will come to your wedding. Remember blood is thicker than water.

Answer 7

I agree with you. I think it should be closer to your family. Is your family paying for the wedding? If so maybe you can kind of blame it on that... well you know they are paying for it and this is where they want it. Bottom line, in the majority of situations, family is more important then friends.

Answer 8

You can hold your wedding in either location. Both family members and friends typically are willing to travel for weddings. We had our wedding where the both of us lived together (which is much easier to plan) and our family and friends that lived out of state traveled to our wedding. In contrast of good friend of mine who lived in DC with her fiance chose to have her wedding at home where her family was and many of her friends traveled to attend her wedding.

I would recommend you and your finance sit down and discuss the pros and cons of planning a wedding in both locations before making a final decision. Compare how many people would have travel to the wedding at both locations, the cost to hold weddings at both locations (wedding costs vary by region), support you would have in planning the wedding at both locations, etc. You can always have a second reception at whichever location you don't choose to have your wedding so everyone can still be involved in your celebration.

Answer 9

I think what you are saying is exactly right. If they are true friends they will follow along with you and your boyfriend's decisions. If they don't then you should start contemplating whether or not they are good friends.

Answer 10

YOUR WRONG !!