My boyfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me for really no good reason. He proposed then dumped me. Completely shattered my heart. Come to find out I'm 2 months pregnant. I told him and at first he thought I was lying then I showed up with proof. Well now he believe me and told me that if I want to keep it then he wants to get married but he'd rather me put it up for adoption. I don't like either idea. I don't want to get hurt again. Is that selfish of me?
To add on, he's almost 20 and is trying to get with one of my 15 year old friends. He says their only friends yet her wants to take her out pretty bad. Dinner and then to the carnival. Sounds like a date to me.
What I think is that he doesnt want me to keep the baby so he has an excuse to screw around...
Thanks for the help. I really appreciate it.
2007-02-16 04:14:38 · 7 answers · asked by Manda 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
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Sounds like he's not emotionally mature enough to handle that type of responsibility.
You're almost 20 and he's wanting to date a 15 year old.
Enough said.
I think you should talk to your parents about the right decision. Know why?
Parents will NEVER lie to their child. Boyfriends will.
Parents will ALWAYS support their child. Boyfriends will change with the wind.
You'll mature faster than he will - it's a given, so you have to ask yourself if you're ready to support the baby AND him.
If so, give him another chance. If not, then move forward and when he grows up emotionally, then talk to him about it.
One love and good luck!
2007-02-16 04:22:17 · answer #1 · answered by HottNikkels 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey...why would you subject yourself to a life with guy who hurts you over and over...let alone has made it clear he doesn't want the baby? Just because he said he would marry you?? If you go through with the marriage...be prepared for a life of pure misery, his cheating and never being home etc. etc. etc. The writing is on the wall.
If you feel you can not raise the baby alone...then you must talk to a professional about all your options (adoption or how to raise a child as a single parent). Make no mistake...even if he marries you...you will be raising the child alone. In fact...you will be raising two children.
That he wants to date a 15 year old girl...which by the way is illegal (hello?)...speaks of his immaturity. That he has reacted this way to you...also speaks of his immaturity. That he wants to get with your friends and broke off with you and didn't care how he hurt you...shows a complete lack of respect and compassion and love for you in any way.
He is allowed to be immature at 20 if he wants....except now he is going to be a father. Oops! Guess he should have thought about that before. Now...he is going to have to pay child support. And don't be a martyr and not ask for it honey. You will only be hurting your child if you do that.
Please go to counseling and find a way to make healthy decisions for you and your unborn child. As much as you want to hope for a happy union with him...he is telling you loud and clear what his intentions are and what kind of a man (boy) he really is.
Take good care of you and your baby.
2007-02-16 12:30:49 · answer #2 · answered by kallie m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend proposed, then broke up with you without explanation. He would prefer you give his and your child away to strangers. He is legally (obviously not emotionally) an adult, and acts like he wants to date a minor.
Well, I think you are very justified in NOT wanting to marry this guy anymore. It sounds like he wouldn't treat you, or his child, very well. Tell this guy to flake off, even if he comes crawling back and promising you he will change. Remember: actions speak louder than words.
As for keeping your baby, can you financially and emotionally support a child on your own? Would you have to go on welfare to do this? (if so, know that you can only get welfare for 5 yrs)
Is your family in a position to help you raise your child? And most importantly: ARE YOU READY TO BE A PARENT NOW AND FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?
Would you be able to give your baby up for adoption? Have you thought about abortion, or the abortion pill?
These are some of the questions you need to ask yourself, and very soon.
Life is about choices, choosing how you want to live your life, and you have some big choices to make ahead of you. Best wishes.
2007-02-16 17:15:34 · answer #3 · answered by melleftcoast 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should really consider talking to your parents about this, as uncomfortable as the conversation may be. Find out if they would be willing to help you if you decide to keep the baby.
As for your ex-fiancee, DO NOT MARRY THIS GUY, whether you decide to keep this baby or not. The worst thing you could do is get married because of the baby and not because of the love that guys once shared.
I think that, although adoption is a decent route, you should really consider keeping the baby. It is a part of you. Only you can love this child like no other.
2007-02-16 12:38:41 · answer #4 · answered by Jay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't care about the child. He feels as though he can't handle it, and doesn't want to be a father. Although, he was willing to take the chances of having a kid by having sex, so it was his own fault, and he should've been prepared for this. If he tries to make you get rid of the kid, get rid of him. He is not going to be a good father if he doesn't want the kid. Trust me.
2007-02-16 12:20:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG. He's not responsible enough to carry responsibilities. And he just played around you. Talk to him about it because that's not good. I feel sorry for the baby. :''(
2007-02-16 12:19:47 · answer #6 · answered by Faye ^___^ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what a dump...(the boyfriend)...you might be better without him if not for your sake for the kids sake..
2007-02-16 12:22:02 · answer #7 · answered by roy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋