Not just occasionally but all the time. I met a guy who is nice and all but he is always too busy with his kids, church, and helping the less fortunate. I'm sure he does alot of good stuff but I am tired of calling him over and over and leaving a message or being asked to call back. He mentioned that his wife had divorced him because he spent too much time doing God's work. I wonder if maybe he just didn't spend any time with her and she felt unappreciated and unimportant in his life. I am greatly disappointed in him as we seemed to want the same things but he is just too busy. I called him 4 times last night. left a message twice (he was busy with his kids although it was quite late), the other times he was on a social call and the other time he put me on hold, so I just hung up. He emailed me back to call him but I didin't. I sent him an email today telling him how I feel. Was I right or am I being too judgemental? I am certainly not going to chase a man.
2007-02-16 04:13:25 · 11 answers · asked by reallyfedup 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sounds like this one needs a lot of chasing.
He's made the center of his life his children and his church. That doesn't leave him space and time for dating. My guess is that he can't make the space and time for someone who doesn't throw themselves into his exact same passionate pursuits.
He's got himself locked into a narrow path. You have to decide whether there's room on it for you, or not. Right now, it sounds like not.
2007-02-16 04:18:23 · answer #1 · answered by Jarien 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, I hear a lot of situations like this. So don't get pressed. This man seems to have a vision for what he wants to do with his life. Seems to me that you are looking to build a relationship with him at a time where this is not his focus.
If he has kids, there may be another woman, in that case, leave him alone because your about to get mixed up in some drama.
His avoiding you could be a message that he is in and out of a bad relationship and there is no room to add you to the mix.
In any case what's for you - is for you. Matt 6:33 Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and all of these things will be added to you.
Follow your purpose in Christ and you will run right in to the one whom God has for you. Never, ever hold on to a relationship that will cause you to loose respect. If he does not have the respect to call you back then he's too busy. You are too important to be be overlooked. If he needed you then he would have found you.
A "good man" will see YOUR good works, he will find YOU with your lamps burning with the fire of God. Doing the work of God. Continue to be a lady in waiting and YOUR man of God will come quickly. Prepare for his coming.
2007-02-16 05:09:34 · answer #2 · answered by Youth Pastor Al 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you already have a hard time dealing with his schedule then it probably won't get any easier. Also knowing that he's let a marriage fail because of this tells you that he won't change much or give up any of his activities. This depends on how much you want to be with him and whether or not you can handle it.
Is there any interest from you to join what he does? If there is then go for it and enjoy spnding the time together. If not, you'll have to make a decision-
lLive with all his time constraints and be with him or cut yourself loose to find someone else who might treat you a little better (the way it sounds like you need to be treated).
Good luck!!
2007-02-16 04:26:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if you and this man do NOT have enough in common. Right now this man is leading a very busy life, doing what he feels is most important to him.It is great that he is charitable with his time, spends time with his children, and is an advocate for worthy causes. I do not think that you are going to be happy with this man, I doubt very much, that he is going to change his life right now, and it sounds as if you expect more from the relationship, then he is able or willing to give.Find some one else, who will be more suitable for you, and has the time for a full-time relationship and will make you a priority in their life.
2007-02-16 04:32:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like he doesn't have much room in his life for a significant other. Doing God's work is nice and all, but overdoing it leaves an unbalanced lifestyle. Those are his priorities however. It's not a fault that needs to be corrected, it's just they way he is. If you want him, you'll have to take him as he is and not expect a lot of change.
2007-02-16 04:22:12 · answer #5 · answered by kj 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must be the same kind of woman to handle a man like this and evidently you are not. If you cannot get involved in church as he does and support his efforts then find someone else.
2007-02-16 04:18:52 · answer #6 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You call him 4 times last night, you e-mail him, you leave messages, you know his past with his ex. and yet.......
YOUR not going to chase a man......Please.............
If your not going to share in his activities, then be gone. He is not the one for you. Use some common sense here. It's not a bad thing, he is just NOT your thing....
2007-02-16 04:22:50 · answer #7 · answered by mark c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put me on hold!!! never!!! Ok he is trying to be the best man of God then maybe that his calling! But you are human and you do have feeling and you deserve the same amount of attention. I dont think he is treating you fairly.
2007-02-16 04:21:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I dont think anybody too involved with church would anything to do with me....so im against it....too many fanatical church people are too judgemental for my taste....but to each his own
2007-02-16 04:16:55 · answer #9 · answered by Huh? 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would not date a religious person, because I am not religious.
2007-02-16 04:18:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋