A group of my friends is having a vday party on saturday. I don't really know the host very well, so therefore I wasn't invited. No big I thought, I just wouldn't go. Some of my friends that were invited wanted me to go, so they got one of the host to call and ask me to go. Even though he called, I know he was forced to so therefore I still don't want to go. What is the proper etiquette here?
2007-02-16 03:40:24 · 11 answers · asked by kayden 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I would call him back and say thanks for the offer but I can not go at this time. Maybe next but thanks for the offer.
2007-02-16 03:45:32 · answer #1 · answered by c0mplicated_s0ul 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It could've been an over site on your host part. Maybe he did want you to come. It is in poor taste to not invite some one when every one else has been invited, unless there was a real faux pa on your part. If you feel the the host really didn't want you to come to the party and only invited you because a mutual friend asked them to ask you, well, then it would be up to you. I could see how you would feel reluctant to go, but if it's a big party, go. You probably wouldn't see the host much, but be gracious when you do. Thank them for the invite. Bring a bottle of wine( if you're old enough) or flowers for the lady of the house.If it's a small party, I wouldn't go unless my boyfriend or girlfriend were going.
2007-02-16 13:22:53 · answer #2 · answered by sweetpea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not possible to invite everyone you know to a party -- your house would be overrun with guests! You looked at it logically, and surmised as much for your self.
However, now that you've been invited, it's up to you to make a choice. The host wasn't "forced" to invite you. In all probability, your friends who wanted you at the party made a request, and he obliged. As a hostess, I've been in the same situation a number of times, and always felt I had the option of saying yea or nay.
If you decide to go, do so, and enjoy yourself. You have been invited. If you choose not to attend, call the guy up and decline, or ask your friends to extend your regrets at the party.
2007-02-16 11:54:30 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Yaz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is the best policy. Tell the host that you feel that your friends may have put a little pressure on him to invite you, and that you completely understand why you were not invited originally. Assure him that you were not offended by the omission, and that he should not feel obligated to invite you now. Even though it's not your faux pas, apologize for your boorish friends. If the host still wants to invite you, and your only objection was the fact that you feel you should not have been invited in the first place, accept the invitation.
Inform your friends that their actions, however well-intentioned, were not appropriate.
2007-02-16 12:06:56 · answer #4 · answered by gamblin man 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
That's kind of tricky. I think I would go because even though the host was "forced" into inviting you, you were invited. The host could have told your friends that he didn't really want to invite you. If you don't go, the host might be offended because he did extend an invitation. Go ahead and go.
2007-02-16 11:48:21 · answer #5 · answered by Purdey EP 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Do you believe he was truly 'forced'; did your friends have to go through a lot of trouble to convince the host? In that case, I probably wouldn't want to go... if the host would rather not have me, I don't feel the need to darken their doorstep.
However, it's equally possible your friends asked the host if you could come and they thought it was just fine, they'd just not thought of it or had limited themselves to a few less people but hey, one more is perfectly welcome! In that case, by all means go, you will indeed be welcome and your friends *and* the host will be happy to see you there.
Any idea which is the case? Then decide :)
2007-02-17 00:06:30 · answer #6 · answered by Sheriam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you still don't want to go, I would suggest you call the host, thank him for the invite, but decline saying you already made plans.
2007-02-16 11:47:58 · answer #7 · answered by All I Hear Is Blah Blah Blah... 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Do not go. Your friends unfairly pressured the host into a no win situation.
2007-02-19 13:52:59 · answer #8 · answered by Daisy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Politely decline the invitation citing other "other plans". You don't need to make something up as "other plans" encompasses many things.
You should however tell your friends not to put you in such a position again.
2007-02-16 12:10:07 · answer #9 · answered by castle h 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead and go.
There's no point in having friends who want you around, if you don't want to honor their pulling for you.
You could be a recluse like me and miss out.
Yikes!
Have FUN!
2007-02-16 11:52:28 · answer #10 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋