Break up - why is it soo hard. We broke up almost 2 monthes ago?

Question

And now he wants to get back together. I tell him I am not waniting to get back together right now.
We did not work out. And he keeps begging.
Please be with me.
Give me one more chance.
You are the only one for me.
I love you, Im going to tell everyone we are together and you wont be able to date anyone.
I will always try to get you back.

We have been together for 6 years.

Answer 1

If you are positive you do not want to get back with him, I would cut off all contact with him. When you are with someone for that long, it's hard to believe that it is over. He keeps getting in contact with you because he's afraid of what life is like without you. He's had you in his life for six years and probably doesn't remember what it was like before that. He doesn't want to let go of you because he doesn't want to have to face it alone.

Each time you talk to him, part of him probably still thinks that there is a chance to get with you. After all, you picked up the phone or opened the door. Until he sees that you are absolutely against any form of contact, he will continue to attempt it. It's not fair to him if you keep giving him that chance. You may not think you're leading him on, but it might feel that way to him.

I would explain to him how you feel. Let him know that you don't want to be with him and make it very clear. After that, you really should cease all contact. I know it's hard to do, but it's for the best for both of you.

Good luck!

Answer 2

This is coming from a males perspective...
Humans are creatures of habit. When being with someone for a lengthy time, it's hard to be alone again. One must change thier life again and that is stressful. Being with someone for a long time is either true love or habit. Chances are if one or more breakups occur it is because life together has become a habit not love. People in love have disagrements and like two best friends, always work it out and forget about it. If it is habit, disagrements turn to anger and only try to work it out when it is to late after the break up. This will occur over and over again till there is a final breakup of the relationship.
Another reason for hard breakups is one partner is always looking over the fence at greener grass. Finally one day the partner leaves the other to have a closer look at the grass on the other side of the fence. After a while they relise that the grass there is not as good as what they had so they want to get back to what they had. By this time it is to late and the other partner does not want them back. If the other partner does take them back, it is because they are also lonely at this time. The realtionship then becomes one of convenience and not love. This will repeat itself till one finds someone they truly love. I thought I was in love with my first 5 reationships and went through some very rough times every time I broke up. I kept trying to get back together and sometimes I did but it would only work for a short time. Then one day I met a lady who became my best friend first then we relised that we were actualy in love. It has been 30 years now and I still feel like we met yesterday. I love her just as much as the day we met and have no desire to jump over the fence for greener pastures. I may glance at the other pasture but have no desire to taste it.

Answer 3

Sometimes it takes a long time --a really long time-- to get over someone. The only thing that helps is time, and distance. If you keep seeing him and try to "be friends" you're just prolonging the pain. The best thing to do is to take a break and not talk or write or email or anything for a while.

Answer 4

It's not about love all the time. Humans hate change, and quite frankly if we were dating for 6yrs I would try and hold on too. The reason being is that he's probably so fimilar and comfortable with you and doesnt understand how to live without you. You got to stick to your guns though it's clear it's not working, you have to force him to change and move on. If you break down and take him back your asking for trouble near future.

Answer 5

Good it particularly depends how foremost for you is to be friend with him. If no longer too essential, than the 2 solutions you acquired earlier than myne are just pleasant. If you happen to particularly care and is foremost for you his friendship, than you have to be a little bit of an analist. Fully grasp that the guy has problems, notably his male ego has been hurted by way of you breaking apart with him. Attempt to put yourself in his sneakers and from there you ll appreciate how to behave.

Answer 6

well he seems kinda stalkerish, but the reason why you cant get over him is cause ur use to him he has been a constant in ur life for 6 yrs and you cant just take that out and not feel anythin. So just take ur time and maybe u"ll find smthin that will replace him

Answer 7

just wait it out after he finds someone who shows intrest he'll leave you alone. trust me he just wants you back because he thought when he was gonna be single he would be beating the girls off with a stick, now he realizes the truth that you were too good for him in the first place and wants to get you back. His loss!

Answer 8

There was a reason you guys broke up in the first place & it sounds like nothing has changed.You may have to act like you hate him for a wile & eventualy y'all will move on. Good luck.

Answer 9

Because "the grass is always greener" and differences of opinions and ideas and it changes your life completely.

Answer 10

the question is.... DO YOU STILL LOVE HIM??? if u still love him then try a second chance but if u dont feel anything anymore what ever u do /say i dont want and love u anymore thats it..