How do you move on....forget about her?

Question

She was the first girl that I ever loved deeply. And she cheated on me. After she did that... she told me that she felt reali bad and she will not be with anyone else...and just wait for me to return when Im ready. I took a big blow...unstable emotionally still today(been a year)...and she hasd lie to me constantly even after she cheated on me. I dont understand how she could lie after the fact that she cheated. Shouldnt she redeem herself? I would if I were her. Its been a year and now she just got with this other guy 2 days ago. AND I feel that she cheated on me once again because she went back on her word...cuz she said she'll wait for me. How could she just put away what we've been through? What should I do? I cant sleep anymore...I cant eat. I constantly have thoughts of suicide and thoughts of me confronting her and hurting her physically. I know Im suppose to go out but my friends arent the going out type....they do every once a month. How do I heal myself? What should I Do?

been together for almost 3 years...most of my college days was with her.

I just now started to talk with one friend about it. I am afraid to come out to my family and friends. I dunno why...maybe cuz I want to protect her rep and I thought I can pick myself up all by myself...she asked me to not tell people back when she first cheated....

And THANK YOU for all the answers so far. I appreciate all ur answers.

Answer 1

Hi , well here is what I think , you may feel hurt and betrayed but the thing is you don't have the bad seed in your life anymore and that is good . If you love her let her be . You don't want to have a girl treat you like this . When you think about it think of the way your life will be without her . It has been a year since this happened and you weren't able to forgive her ,so most likely you weren't . There is someone just as sweet and honest and respectful of her body out there . Just give yourself time to get over her . You may not want to get over her but your not doing anything but hurting yourself . She has moved on and doing or thinking of doing bad things to her or yourself is not going to do anything but hurt the ones that really love you or want to love you . There is probably a girl out there right now that may have her eye on you and you don't even know cause you are mixed up with your ex's life . Lay back and see that one girl who may be interested in you and is waiting for you to approach her . You sound very smart and intellegent so don't make a mistake that will stop you from being happy with someone else . It's hard but hang in there someone will love you and treat you right . Just look and you will see . Try and smile more and don't look so mean . GOOD LUCK !!!!! BEST WISHES !!!!

Answer 2

Hi! listen I just let my very first love go to I loved him more than anything in this world, I'm 33 now I was with him for 7 years my reasoning is alot more differenrt than yours but we won't get into that. Hey you have to first of all try not to think that it's the end of the world. I am not one for cheating nor beleive in divorce. And if I'm with a man and he has the nerve to cheat well he's telling me that he don't give a flying **** for me anyways right! And you say that it has been a year, man don't lose yourself over this girl. I know that you love her and she was your first true love but you need to try your best to let it go. Try talking more about it with family and friends, thats always great support and if you don't have that well get yourself a pen and paper and write your feelings down. I don't know like,when I let my man go I just took a look at my own life and where it was going, I come to realize it was going no where and I wanted to feel good about myself so I first started by getting out more even by myself just for a walk to the store or something, started doing all the things that I should have been doing for myself and my family instead of thinking about all I had to do for him all the time, I started a blog on 360, thats were I keep some of my stuff and I share cause it could be good for others ya know! I call old friends, I started a little job. Just try to change your feelings about yourself and your life from the negative feelings to just positive all the way around. Don't keep putting your life on hold, you deserve a milllion times better.

Take care and good luck.

Answer 3

It's pretty hard. But you know, you're the only one that can help yourself. She cheated on you 2 times in a row. Even if she was the very first girl that you ever loved deeply, your heart will just tell you that it's tiring to love someone who doesn't love you back, cheated on you and hurt you. You should move on. Stop thinking about suicide or something. Don't even waste your time. You don't need to confront her. Don't even get carried away by her lines. Imagine that you're just in a play. Everything has a FINISH LINE but it's not the end of your life. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say here. And.. Another thing, don't waste your time on someone who doesn't even care at all, cause life's too short to waste on the wrong one. Take care.

Answer 4

Travel some, make more friends but this time the ones that like to go out and have fun! Try your best to move on, do yourself the favor and stop tormenting yourself, that chic has no genuine feelings for you. She's just stringing you along. Use this time for yourself do different things hang out with some friends at a cafe, meet new people and make plans with them. They more you learn to love yourself the more prepared and stable you will be when you get into a new relationship just make sure you forgive that chic for what she did (if you don't you'll never move on, just drop the dead weight, get the poison out of your system). I can guarantee you when she noticed you moved along she'll try to get you under her thumb again, whatever you don't go back to an individual like that. You deserve someone "way" better, someone that will be emotionally considerate of you!

Answer 5

I am glad that you are expressing genuine feelings. But they are very impulsive and intense. everybody in this world will be cheated on atleast once in their life. I understand that you love her and how hurt you are. I too have been there, but to be honest with you as a woman, If she cheated on you then she will cheat again. to my knowlegde there is only maybe two major reasons why a woman will cheat. 1. She does not know what she wants, or who she is and is looking to define herself with these sought of acts and 2. she isn't emotionally attached to the other person. She just is not the girl for you. You spoke of depression and even suicide but that says a whole lot about where you are emotionally and mentally as well. you can not let someone elses issues control or dictate your life. Not giving in to these impulses will only make you stronger. You are too wrapped up in her life. Do things that make you happy. if you are looking for true love you have to have that love for yourself. Word of Wisdom: you will only attract people who reflect who you are. You attract what you are. SO think about it and think about who you really want to attract and not the one that got away (left ). Nobody deserves to be treated that way and dont think that you have to take it . There is that perfect person and as long as you stay focused and better yourself you will attract people who are doing the same. and who see that in you KEEP YOUR HEAD UP!

Answer 6

o my you need to calm down and relax. stop thinking about all the good memories. you need to move on. even though you loved her, obviously she didn't love you. if she cheated then why would you be moping over her. she moved on and you need to too even though it will take a while. go out with your guy friends and meet new people (ladies) and i am sure she will eventually come out of your head. i want to wish you luck and dont kill yourself over someone like that. your life is not worth ending over a dumb chick. if you are young there is plenty time to find more love ones. i hope you at least try to move on because you are only hurting yourself more and more each day.

good luck i wish the best

Answer 7

She may have got tried of waiting on you. You said it has been a year since you broke up. You both probably need to just move on with your life's. Try to go out with some other girls.Maybe you will find someone better for you.

Answer 8

move on boy..cheaters are good preteneders & remain as cheaters.. they will just repent when no one's going to love them anymore.. she's not worth it..