I'm 25 & he is 23.His parents are not accepting this & they have told that, they can never accept me.We met each other in our last company.He was desperate for me & took the first initiative.As my parents would never accept him,I was not ready to accept him & I told him everything on his face.But he was so determined & was able to convince me.Both of us were ready to go against our family.Things were going fine.At that time,he was not emotionally very much attached to his family,but now he has started feeling his responsibility towards his parents,being the elder son.He has engaged himself in the family affairs & his mom tries to convince him emotionally.Sometimes he gets convinced & has told me that, he can't marry me without their approval & blessings.Still he is trying to convince them,he needs some time,but I'm pretty sure that, this is not gonna melt the ice.I don't wanna lose him.But I know, he is not gonna do anything going against them which he has told me very clearly.Advise.
2007-02-16 01:37:56 · 20 answers · asked by ani d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
What is it they won't accept? The age difference is hardly worth making a fuss about, so if it's that then they're just retarded I'm sorry. Is it that you worked at the same company? Or is there a racial issue here? Or do they just not like you? Need more details to help.
2007-02-16 01:43:05 · answer #1 · answered by Lowa 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is a hard so play cool for a while. Give it a time frame of 6 weeks without asking the parents. Then you try to get on the mothers side, get some books from the library to give some tips. She could be one of those moms that doesn't want her little boy to go or she may feel he us too young to be tied down. I had a mum like that too. I ended up going interstate to have freedom. Also ask yourself who did the asking. Was there any pressure on either side. If all is clear and you are equipped financially and you really love one another I advise elope but give it 12 months. Good luck.
2007-02-16 01:51:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys don't need to prove if you're right for eachother or not. if you know - you know. You guys are the ones getting married not his parents - although you will become family. I had a friend in a simular situation. His parents did not like her at all and wanted to stop the wedding but he told his mom and dad that 'I am marrying this girl and she is my family now'. When he marry's you you're together and need to help eachother. He may lose contact with his family but maybe it will work out.
God Bless
2007-02-18 12:53:19 · answer #3 · answered by Ashley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is going to be difficult for him to go against his parents. Given time they may accept you, but I wouldn't hold my breath on it. You can not make them love or accept you. If you two wish to spend the rest of your lives together you both will have to decide if you can take the good with the bad. Are you willing to be with him knowing his family dislikes you? Is he willing to go against them and be with you knowing they don't like the two of you in a relationship? These are just a few questions you will have to ask yourselves. If you can deal with the difficulties this will cause then more power to you, just be sure that you can handle the strife that will come with them not liking you. It will take a toll on yours and his relationship.
2007-02-16 02:06:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your Boy Friend that, If you both get married to each other there family will worry for 6 months - 1 year. Again they will come to u people and accept you both.
If not you both will feeling for the whole life ... If you both are in true love.
It happened with many of my frnds and my own brother...
But be sure that you people also should suffer for 6months - 1year after the marriage especially the girl.....
Girl should be patience until his family accepts uuuu....!
This will be the really exam in ur life.
Convience in this way to you Boy Friend
2007-02-16 01:49:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You don't have to convince anyone else of your love for each other. If it's truly there, it's for you and him/her only. I don't know what your religious (or whatever) background is, but it seems to me that your families are very important and must be respected. By the same token, love is something that should be considered by you and the man. If he loves you, that's all well and good, but if he can not go against his family because of his beliefs, this could be a very bad decision for you. Is it worth it to live with someone who is afraid to put you 1st? You have to decided how you want to live your life with this particular man. Good luck with whatever you decided to do.
2007-02-16 01:40:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hang on this sounds like a religious clash. It those seem patience is a virtue. SCREW ALL THAT
Bring the families together sit them down in the front room DECLARE your undying love and devotion to one another.SAY how you feel.Show them this . And tell your families WHEN YOUR NOT THERE for me who's gonna be there ? .This my life!
you've got to sort it out with your boyfriend.Its a really bad dilemma family or girlfriend (soon to be wife?)
I still DOnt understand why there not taking you in.And your parents no taking him in.
FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCTS your gutt-feeling , your heart.
If hes not gonna do anything theres no point waiting a round!
IF YOU LOVE ME YOU'LL DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT .#
This happened to my cousin OH MY GOD EXACTLY THE SAME.
But it was the girl who was faltering. In the end he was heart-broken and went away.Because she couldn't make the decision! GIRL SHE REGRETS IT , SHES OUT THERE LOOKING FOR HIM RIGHT NOW ! shes searching the globe trackiung his footsteps, shes in AFRICA!!!!
GO WITH THE FLOW!
2007-02-16 01:55:53 · answer #7 · answered by Animhet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, you may never convinve either of your parents to except your other. You two have to decide if your parents approval is important enough to you that you would stop your relationship. You need to ask him straight out if he is going to continue or progress (ie marriage) with this relationship if his parents don't approve. If he says no, you need to move on. You will go through this your whole life if you stay with him. You only need to get over him once!
2007-02-19 01:33:48 · answer #8 · answered by Sara K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are his parents so against you? Is it seriously just because of a two year age difference???
You asked for advice, I'm going to say dump the chump. He has obvsiouly already told you in so many words that his parents are much more important to him than you are.
2007-02-16 01:47:57 · answer #9 · answered by Sunidaze 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever you do in life, do not get married until you are at least 30.
Experience life without a ball and chain, see the world, do things, have fun, sew your oats and get that out of your system.
You'll have a better chance of a long lasting marrige if you do.
2007-02-16 01:44:24 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋