Well me and my girlfriend have been going out for 6 months now and i want to have sex with her but don't know how to ask. but there is a side problem:- she doesn't want her family or anyone to know about us till shes done high school (its been a rough 6 months but i love her very much so i wont leave just cause i have to wait). I cant even get her to come to my house cause she has 2 brothers that drives buses and they pass along the route to my house so she is afraid they will see her. what should i do and how do i go about asking with out sounding like most vulgar men (no offense guys but some of y'all just bloody disgusting)
2007-02-16 00:50:40 · 23 answers · asked by kyle_is_back82 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She has said she wanted to at least 2 or 3 times
2007-02-16 00:55:55 · update #1
she is 19 am 18 and no shes not a virgin
2007-02-16 00:57:34 · update #2
I think you should just ask her if she wants to. You should find out if she is not coming to your house because she is genuinely worried about her brothers or whether she is worred about the two of you spending time alone together?
I come from a very strict catholic family and to be honest I didnt even think about having a boyfriend until I went away to college. I knew that it was going to be an issue while i was still at home.
Tell her how much you love her and that you would really like to take your relationship to the next level. It doesnt have to be sleazy any way and letting her know that you want to do it because you really care about her is totally natural.
She might feel bad about sneaking behind her families back though. Its really tough for both of you, but at the end of the day if she feels uncomfortable about it then there is nothing more you can do. Is there any way that you could go away together even for the day and spend some time on your own?
2007-02-16 01:00:52 · answer #1 · answered by salsabrunette 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Age is a big thing here. Wait until she is legal and do not rush her. A woman's innocence only lasts so long. Don't ruin it for her. If she isn't willing to let her family know about you shouldn't even want to sleep with her. You are kind of coming off as a typical male by wanting to sleep with her under these cirucumstances. You both sound too young to even be considering sex. I think you should both hold off until either of you no longer have a curfew and are old enough to make these decisions on your own. Wait until you pay taxes.
2007-02-16 01:09:14 · answer #2 · answered by in2one 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you need to do is calm her down and tell her that its fine no one will know, see, or even think that she is with a guy. You need to maybe get hot-n-heavy and ask her after like 15-20 minutes if she is ready to take it to the next level. But before that you need to talk with her about it, how she feels about sex, and if she is ready for that huge transformation. Always let her know that you'll be there for her no matter the situation and if you love her tell her that quite a bit.
good luck & be safe
2007-02-16 00:56:48 · answer #3 · answered by aricalyn10<3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the politest way is to marry her first.
Ok, since you have updated your question with some fairly critical information, I will update my answer.
The politest way is to marry her first.
You say you don't want to be vulgar. If she is ashamed of you for some reason, you shouldn't be together, and if her parents don't want her to be seeing someone (probably so she doesn't get into "trouble" if she is active as you have indicated), then if you really love her RESPECT HER PARENTS. Tell them that you want to date her and ask their permission. If they say "no," then don't. However, if you really love her... don't stop asking until they say "yes." Find out what it will take to get them to approve of your relationship, and show them that you are willing to do what it takes. If you respect them, then they will respect you... and so will your girlfriend. If you are not ready to be married and responsible for a wife and family, then you are not ready to be having sex... (that is the secular answer... the church one is pretty much the same).
2007-02-16 00:56:46 · answer #4 · answered by David T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wsup man.....thats eeeeasy!
first of all forget about the brothers issue they wount be there watch out for their sis..find a way to sneak her in...there are 1001 ways to do that...
get rid of all ur small brothers unhook the phone just to avoid any disturbances when the time comes..
secondly....make sure u hav arranged for a meal or something that will get the two of u talking just to ease her up and make her feel secure...
third.....grab a bottle of wine pour her some initiate another conversation this time round something abit more intimate.....u can figure that out
dont ask if u can sleep with her.....just move up close continue the chit chat...then touch her.....if ur conversation was intimate enuf....everything just slides into place....
2007-02-16 01:12:49 · answer #5 · answered by bympz 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well, it's really hard. the first you need to consider is that, is she a virgin? i hope i didn't offend you. becoz if she is, now that pretty hard. girl would like some assurance you know. you must feel first is she ready and up to it. coz if she is not, there is no way you can ask her. vulgar way or not. one more thing, are u ready for the consequences just in case you know....
2007-02-16 00:55:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your gf doesn't want anyone to know that's a red flag on it's own. Your best bet is to enjoy the time you have together and don 't ruin it by asking for something that she might not be ready for.
2007-02-16 00:55:57 · answer #7 · answered by shae 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first off, (I hate sounding imposing) you shouldn't be with someone who is still in highschool. Even if she's 18, you shouldn't think about sleeping with someone who might not be mature enough to handle a sex life. And if you are worried about her family noticing you, then for god sakes, find someone else who lives on their own.
2007-02-16 00:54:48 · answer #8 · answered by matthaumschild 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
okay first of all, how old is this girl, i hope she's not a minor cause from wat i read it sounds like you're much older than her if she cant tell her parents about u, cant go to you're house cause of her little brothers. if she is a minor and you're old as hell, u are in the wrong. and you shouldnt be trying to sleep with her let alone having a relationship with her. so i hope you're not doing wrong.
2007-02-16 00:57:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let the moment happen when it will. If you have to ask, it will feel forced and may cause more strain or an already tenuous relationship.
2007-02-16 00:55:18 · answer #10 · answered by fly guy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋