Been married for 14 yrs and to be honest its not going so well. She has a online "friend" who just happens to be a man. They have moved into talking on the phone she claims he helps her in a spiritual way. Now she says she feels obligated to meet him for all the help he has given her. I have voiced my objection to this but she doesnt seem to understand why I have a problem with it.
I'm in a very bad place right now spiritually and looking for words of encouragement.
2007-02-16 00:04:14 · 18 answers · asked by This too shall pass 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
That sucks. You have every right to be concerned. I don't know what to tell you.
2007-02-16 00:08:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand your situation, but you don't need to feel desperate. If she thinks he's so interesting, try pointing to her the interesting things about yourself (if you think she's worth the effort, of course). Given that you shared 14 years, I don't think she fell for this man. Maybe she thinks she needs spiritual help in the first place because, without realizing, you've taken her for granted in the last 5-6 years or something. If you simply have a conventional marriage, like for the reason of having someone to lay your head next to at night, it won't work anyway. And if the spark remained in your hearts even now, after 14 years, it won't be hard gaining her back. The thing is, you need to see for yourself what the real situation is. And as for encouragement, I'm convinced things will turn out to be just fine, because you simply don't have anything to lose. I mean, come on. If she dumped you for a guy she met online, she wouldn't be considered a loss.
Best of luck!
2007-02-16 00:14:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not tell her you need spiritual encouragement too and it might be nice to meet this guy. Her reaction should tell you what you need to know.
All I can say is nothing is known yet, so for now give her the benefit of the doubt.
If it turns out she's cheating , deal with that when it's known. The truth will be on your side.
2007-02-16 00:13:36 · answer #3 · answered by guy o 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry you're hurting right now. Can you ask to go with her to meet him? You want to thank the man who has helped your wife so tremendously in such a spiritual way. Perhaps if you meet him, you'll get a better handle on what's going on.. if it really is nothing, she should have no objection to you wanting to be there.
Take heart, and stand up for yourself. Her commitment is to you and not to him. After 14 years, she should consider your feelings above anyone else's.
Give yourself a hug for me.
This too, shall pass :)
2007-02-16 00:11:56 · answer #4 · answered by Kallan 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest you offer to go along with her on this spiritual journey and that you too would like to learn from this man and then you both can grow spiritually together. If this man is a spiritual counsellor and has good intentions he would be delighted that you are doing this together with your wife. If you can pray in the Spirit for this situation pray whenever you can (Ephesians 6:18). I pray that God will impart you with His love and wisdom to handle this situation well. May the shalom of God be with you. Amen.
2007-02-16 00:30:03 · answer #5 · answered by seekfind 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, this is not good at all, your Wife sounds as if she is getting involved here and if so there is big heartbreak further up the road for you both, if it was me I would go and have a word with this man and let him know how I feel and that he must stop seeing your Wife, but please do not go in anger as this would not help at all.
The greatest spirituality is that between Husband and Wife who are soul partners in Gods eyes, could it not be possible for you both to seek closer spiritual fufillment in the Lord together?
Another solution is that you offer to go with her to meet this guy and if she declines then you will know that something is not right here for sure.
2007-02-16 00:12:06 · answer #6 · answered by Sentinel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take her out to dinner. Wine her and dine her.
Then on the way home drive in to the country. Murder her and leave her in a ditch. How's that for spiritual awakening?
The others are right, if there's nothing wrong, go with her to meet him. Frankly I think you've been tolerant already. She is making a fool of you. Punish her.
2007-02-16 00:11:28 · answer #7 · answered by Leviathan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go with Her and don't take know for a answer...Stand strong in this go with her...You are Her husband and you are the one that should be giving her help spiritual help..Wisdom you do have the right to go with Her she is your wife,,This could be a set up by Satan..to draw her away from her husband..if She dose not want you to go..then that is wrong..and you stand STRONG follow her anyway and let her no your going to follow her..She is your wife not His..and all she needs should be coming from you and no stranger...Pray that will give you strenght and encouragement wisdom is knowing right from wrong..and this is wrong unless you are involved in it...protect your wife...by standing strong..what ever you do don't let her go alone..God bless you and the USA and Israel and All...this is a BIG temptation from Satan trying to lure your wife to someone else...
2007-02-16 03:09:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing I would do is take that computer, & disable it, Because your wife is headed on a down hill road, & soon she will not be with you, this is a way satan has destroyed many homes, Because people use it for the wrong purpose. Your wife does not need another man to advice her on religious matters, She should turn to you. Because the bible says for a women to ask their husband at home.
2007-02-16 00:13:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not good, I'm sorry you're going through tough times.
As far as words of wisdom and encouragement goes, then read in Psalms and Proverbs.
2007-02-16 00:17:48 · answer #10 · answered by tracy211968 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you are in a bad place spiritually hen God allows conflicts to get us back into a good place spiritually so go for it. Get your life right with God and then see what He will do with your wife's life.
2007-02-16 00:09:58 · answer #11 · answered by oldguy63 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋