Well, actually, she's not really a friend, more of a college colleague. And I know that she's in love with me. The problem is that there is a lot of history between us, most of it bad, with a lot of fighting and screaming and crying, so it isn't easy. Yet, the same girl that did all that to me once was with me conforting me for 3 straight hours after my grandfather got hospitalized. I know she loves me, but she seems afraid to go out with me on her own. But I feel there really is something strong between the both of us. Even her older sister has tried to put us together more than once. The other day, we went out with a large group of friends, and while we didn't exchange words during dinner, later when we were in a bar drinking, she couldn't take her eyes off me. This is really driving me insane, because I know how she feels, and this is going on for far too long, and I don't know what else to do.
2007-02-15 23:16:57 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you are in love as you claim, and I have no reason whatsoever to doubt you, all you have to do is to convice her both by words, actions and deeds that you have changed and that you really love her and that nothing of the silly tings of the past will ever happen again.
She is obviously in love with you, as you have said, particularly your history, but I wonder if her looking at you at the bar was purely an expression of love or wondering wheather you have changed at all or not. Its her way of trying to ask her self, is this the very person whom i love, but always acting differently, cruely and nastly, or he has changed.
Yes, she is in love with you as you with her.
Do change and prove to her that you have changed.
Obviously you seem to have learnt your lessons. Tell her that. But telling alone will not be sufficient. You need to prove to her by actions and deeds, and that will take a little bit of time. Persevere and you will succeed.
I really wish you all the best!/
2007-02-15 23:27:20 · answer #1 · answered by Ebby 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hate to say this, but I get the impression she knows how much you like her and it makes her feel powerful, so she likes to observe you. She flirts and "can't take her eyes of you" when she's in a public place like a bar where she knows other women might come up to you and nothing can really happen between the two of you there. She doesn't necessarily want you, but she sure doesn't wantto see you happy with anyone else either. The thing where you said she "seems afraid" to be alone with you" or whatever that was is contradictory for someone who is supposed to be "in love" with you as well. I'd be a little weary with that one and start observing her when she's not watching YOU. I'd be willing to wager that she's got a couple irons in the fire and flirts around with a few guys. Validation, you see. Funny , but I can almost see this whole thing. Hold on to your wallet there, pal. Hard to get might be the game she's holding out for. I know I'm negative sounding, but I've seen every game around lately.
2007-02-16 07:49:21 · answer #2 · answered by Aidan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two people have said talk to her. I agree. Either you love each other or you don't stop torturing yourself and confront her and get it over with.
However, you must examine this: If you two are "in love" and you are friends, what caused all the differences between you that made for all the screaming and crying? Do you two really have the ability to get along as friends or more? (Not that people who are in love don't argue and that screaming and crying won't ensue :)) ) Do not let one good deed by her cloud your judgment that she IS the one for you. Good friends are always there for you like in the situation w/your grandfather. Perhaps she is only that and you are merely strongly physically attracted to her? But that's not love. Really examine things in the light of your having a full-out conversation w/ her. Because truly being in love means accepting the shortcomings along w/ the good qualities, being forgiving of them, and being self-sacrificing on a regular basis, and being there for them-listening if nothing else. Yes UNCONDITIONAL love.
Talk to her, honey.
2007-02-16 08:52:16 · answer #3 · answered by dannie 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk to her let her no how u feel for her. tell her dont be scared. tell her that im not promising that it will work out but im willing to give it a try if you are. and if and when yall get together take it slow and keep everything out and in the open.
2007-02-16 07:25:26 · answer #4 · answered by shelladear 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Use your past experience to make sure the relationship works this time.
2007-02-16 09:04:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude , just let her know how u feel, the worst u can do is look like an idiot and u can always say that u were drunk.
2007-02-16 09:27:35 · answer #6 · answered by shelly 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you should ask her why she is scared and maybe tell her that you love her aas well
2007-02-16 07:21:13 · answer #7 · answered by spongebob 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her!
2007-02-16 07:21:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋