So I was moving along as normal with this girl, but then she told me that she can't handle a relationship right now. She thinks she'll hurt me because she's selfish and is about having fun and such. We're just 'friends' right now, but we still act like a couple because all the feelings are still there. And we both know that it's kind of serious at where we're at. I actually feel a spark with this girl. She keeps saying we should be stronger and not do anything, but we always end up holding hands or kissing or something. This status has lasted about a month. I don't want to just forget about this girl because I can actually see myself loving this girl one day. And I know something's there... I can feel it. It's not just like a simple attraction or anything. I really care about her. But with all this, she still can't be in a relationship because of the reasons I've mentioned. What should I do???
2007-02-15 22:20:28 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Make some distance between the two of you. And no more couple stuff until she wants to be a couple (kissing, holding hands, etc.). You might even go out on a few dates with other girls (let her know you're doing so). It can't hurt. If it's the real deal with this girl, nothings going to change for you but I bet she starts thinking long and hard about why she feels anxious about you going out with other people. It's stupid, it's a game, but THE game has to be played, at least for a while, but I wouldn't recommend making a habit of gaming.
2007-02-15 22:31:18 · answer #1 · answered by randyken 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know where you're coming from. A girl recently broke up with me after a month for the same reasons. I could also see myself loving that girl and we did have the chemistry. BUT, you have different needs right now and either of you sacrificing them to be together will lead to a dead end. I'd suggest distancing yourself enough for your feelings to calm down. See other people, find your self balance. If either of you return to try again, at the very least you'll be able to handle things much better. Emotion clouds the judgment considerably. Do not stay friends if you think you can't handle your feelings and something tells me you can't. I know I couldn't. Give YOURSELF the time you need and don't worry right now about the time she needs. I believe within a month apart you'll feel much better and have a much clearer view of things. Oh, and by the way, you deserve a woman mature enough to want to be in a steady, loving relationship. Don't ever forget that!
2007-02-15 22:58:47 · answer #2 · answered by Dennis K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The smart thing is to give her exactly what she wants! Just buddies. Which means YOU GET TO date other hotties and this girl'll still be your friend. Best of both worlds!! I'd let her alone. And I bet cha' she'll come back if she's really interested. Women always want what they cannot have--so be un-gettable--and she'll notice. I'd admit though she does sound emotionally selfish and immature...but you can't help who you like, right? If you start pulling away and she does NOTHING---you're sunk! The only way you're gonna know where you really stand, however, is to start dating other girls, and see if she changes her mind about you. good luck. hope you get the girl.
2007-02-15 22:33:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I learned the best thing to do is act like you don't care. Depending your feelings it may be hard but trust me, I acted aloof with girls(cause I was cheating) and they all of a sudden called every single day.
2007-02-15 22:27:41 · answer #4 · answered by Edward 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you sound like a girl yourself
2007-02-15 22:24:45 · answer #5 · answered by ill take it straight with no ice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋