Help me, please!?

Question

It's kinda complicated. I tend to be a very faithful person, even if I hate the person I'm currently "with" I won't just cheat on them. I just recently left my hubby (first got together, he was better than sliced bread, but after the wedding, he might as well have been moldy bread). While I was with him, I told a friend that I've had since childhood that I had just recently seen her in a mature, womanly light. Turns out, she was crushing on me too. So we made an agreement. If I left hubby, I'd be with her, even if not in a real relationship.
I befriended this other guy during my marriage. He's really hot and really nice and oh so funny. So we flirted. He said he wanted to be with me. I told him "Get rid of my hubby for me, and I'm all your's" But he didn't toss hubby on his ***, I did.
What gave me the courage to leave hubby was the most perfect man I've ever met. We are so totally in love. There was no single period for me. I went straight from hubby to him. But it's long distance!

I told my friend and the other guy these things before I met my boyfriend. But they both know I'm taken and are both open about the fact that they still want to be with me!
I don't want to cheat on my love. I'm doing my best not to. But I need help! How can I maintain my friendly relationship with the other two, when I truthfully do want to sleep with them?

Ok, let me clarify this, since I apparently made that sound horrible in my moment of intense confusion.

I do not WANT to sleep with either of my friends. But there IS a very strong sexual desire. I think if my man were here locally, I would not have this problem. But he does not and I have gone quite a long time with no sex. Not only that, but as a part of my minds way of trusting people, I am a very physical person. I need to touch and be touched, and not nessecarily in a sexual manner. Hubby was an *sshole, and threw a fit if I HUGGED my friends. It's been almost 2 years since the last time I had any form of physical contact with anyone but my hubby.

Ok, my judgement was not impaired with my husband. While we dated and were engaged, he was nice and let me hang out with my friends and gave me personal space when I needed it. But when we got married, I couldn't chill with my friends anymore, I could only do the things he wanted.
And as for my boyfriend, I was in perfect condition when we met and I left my husband. I had wanted to leave my husband for the longest time, but never got the courage until then.
And the whole thing with my female friend, my bf knows that I am bi, and he respects that. He didn't act like a typical guy and ask to watch/join. He basically said "to each their own" and if that was what made me happy, so be it.
And yes, she and I would still be friends. We've been through thick and thin together, doing everything BUT sleep together. She will always be near and dear to me as a friend, and I have no desire for a romantic relationship, nor does she. We just have a physical attraction to each other.

After evax_ian's answer, I feel I need to point out, my husband and I are legally seperated and are waiting for our pending divorce to go through.

I don't want to date either of my friends. I don't want to have sex with them, but the desire is there and very strong.

The point is I don't WANT to have sex with anyone but my boyfriend. But, when I'm with these two friends, my BODY reacts and all I WANT is to stay faithful.

Answer 1

OMG!! thats soo complicated..!
but hey, its not nice ure doin dat..
ya c, ure married but ure flirtin with sum1 else..
and yes, you got a strong reason in doing dat..
so, if i were u, i ll let them all know the truth..
yes, its sooo risky, but well, honesty is the best policy!
good luck in whatever u do n ure so lucky to hav so much opinions..think wisely and do judge their opinions..!

Answer 2

By your discription, You have a problem with perspective. You thought your Husband was great until you married him. Now your saying this about your boyfriend. Calm down. Secondly, do you see your self with your female friend 30 years from now. I would say have some fun, but you would probably lose a good friend if you do. DO you want to risk it? THird half the guy will freak if they found out you are interested in the same sex as well. On the other hand, the other half will say, can I join in. I don't know what type of guy your boyfriend is, but if you just want to have some fun before you look for a serious relationship, Watch some porn and gauge if he is willing to let you go out with the girls. Maybe ask some questions while watching. You just broke up, so your emotions are freaking out. DO not expect your next relationship to be your life long one. Remember, you were wrong about your husband.

Answer 3

what the.....u have seriuos issues!!! dont be in a relationship when u want to have sex with sumone else....thats not fair to one of u dont u think?

Answer 4

This is a simple as it gets " Go see a SHRINK" you are in a mess , maybe she can help you.....