gift list is held, without seeming rude? Is it bad ettiquette to put it in the invitations? We don't want to seem money grabbing!
2007-02-15 20:22:37 · 14 answers · asked by Mrs Stevo 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You could send out a little "memo" to the affect of We have been asked by several where we are registered. The bride and groom are registered at "the place where you are registered"
2007-02-16 02:11:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Not so much rude to put in an invitation but presumptious and a bit uncaring. Nowadays if people intend buying you a gift they would ask the couple or family member if there is a Wedding List if that would be their preference to buy from or ask when returning their invitation acceptance card.. The list itself is an excellent idea as unlike years ago I don't know anyone who would not have co-ordinating towels and bedding. Also nowadays it's not all double beds, but Super King, King, Queen etc so you can't just purchse double as years ago. However, you are never aware of the financial position of all the guests you are inviting and may already have purchased a gift for you when it was discounted or already have a Store Card for a department store other than where your list is they wish to use. It's good to keep these things in mind when making the decision about including with invitations. Naturally the advise the store where your list is will tell you it's in order to include with invitations but then they want the business. Also people being married for the second time or more often first of all have homes well furnished and naturally are embarrassed about asking, especially their own side for yet another wedding gift. Also it is understandable if going to a wedding most people feel and want to still give something and I know when asked quite often now the couple say they are not looking for gifts but if they wished to put a donation to their favourite charity they would be delighted.
2007-02-16 00:12:38 · answer #2 · answered by Ms Mat Urity 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is completely bad ettiquette to put any mention of gifts in the invitation.
By doing that not only are you telling your guests that you expect a gift but also where to get it - pretty cheeky.
Have your mother, aunt, cousin or somebody who is social and pretty connected to most of the guests spread the word. And have your finace do the same with one of his family members.
If someone is throwing you a shower they are allowed to put the registry info in the invite because it is a 3rd party who is sending the invitation.
2007-02-16 00:39:58 · answer #3 · answered by rickybobbi 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, it is bad etiquette. Proper etiquette states that you *do not* include registry information or mention gifts *anywhere* on or in the invitation. Don't listen to the registry associates at stores. They will tell you that it's ok to put the little cards in your invitation, but it's not.
While gifts are customary at weddings they are not obligatory, meaning your guests don't have to give you a gift.
The proper way to let people know where you're registered at or what you want/need is by word of mouth. Tell your family and bridal party where you're registered or what you want/need and they can let guests know. You can also tell people who ask, but only if they ask!
2007-02-15 21:50:13 · answer #4 · answered by Just Jess 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a big discussion with my now husband about this last year when we got married. It was worse for us cos it was my 3rd marriage and his second, and we'd got a houseful of stuff already.I persuaded him that if we DIDNT put in anything about gifts then people would ring up, probably me, and say what would you like, and if they didnt ring up they would say to their partner 'We've got to give them SOMETHING, lets give them some nice glasses' and then we'd end up with tons of glasses! So with the invitations, on a separate sheet which gave details of how to get to the venue, dress code etc at the bottom i put:
Your presence means more than presents but if you would like to give a gift then Faith's sister, Hope, is holding a gift list, and she can be reached on email no xxxxxx
Instead of the sister bit you could put the name and tel no or web address of the shop.
I think it is only fair to make things as easy as possible for people. I dont think its bad etiquette to do this. And it is not money grabbing if you have gifts that incorporate all price ranges.
Good luck with your wedding - plan carefully and it will be great!
Faith x
2007-02-15 20:40:04 · answer #5 · answered by Caroline 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The company that you will be registered for will most likely provide you with small cards to put inside your wedding invitations.
As most lists are done electronically now, this will give your guests the option to buy your gifts online.
It is not bad manners to include a gift list in with your invitation, in fact it is bad etiquette not to!
Your gift list is a really big help to all your guests, It will make it easier for you and for them.
Congratulations and Good Luck!
2007-02-15 20:43:05 · answer #6 · answered by fairyprincesscorinne 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The gift list is usually included in the wedding invitations. To avoid sounding money-grabbing, the best way of enclosing it is to tell people that, if they are struggling for gift ideas, you have a gift list with 'xxx' shop.
This avoids the impression that you are insisting on receiving gifts from the gift list but also acts as a 'gentle direction' towards your gift list.
2007-02-15 20:28:53 · answer #7 · answered by carlmifflin 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
No it's ok put it with the invitations, lots of people have gift lists so don't feel bad about it. It's not cheeky it's just a way of making sure you get exactly what you want.
2007-02-15 21:00:15 · answer #8 · answered by dollydaydream22 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You don't put anything in with your invitations. If people need help in choosing a gift, they may ask your family members for suggestions.
2007-02-16 01:48:13 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let your parents know and have them spread the word if its mentioned about gifts.
OR, created a wedding site (like on http://www.theknot.com ) and put your gift registry there. When you make the invitations let them know about the wedding site, but make no mention of the registry.
2007-02-16 00:05:14 · answer #10 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋