Can you be with someone long term who you are intellectually incompatible with?

Question

I have a b/f who I love very much. He is everything I've ever wanted except for one thing, we are not intellectually compatible.

He is very simple and simple minded. I am a deep thinker and a very analytical person. I get frustrated at times and sometimes feel I'm alone b/c of this.

However, he is faithful, takes great care of me, we are very sexually compatible, share the same values, both very spiritual, have a great time hanging out together, like a lot of the same things, etc. He is a great emotional support for me.

I have dated men who are intellectual but they did not have all of the great characteristics my b/f has, and were not near as sensitive to my needs.

Please help!

Answer 1

personally i think that you should stay with him. it's hard to find all of those qualities with somebody. i have the same problem i am an academic my fella is the total opposite. i have been with him for five years now. we met at school i was in the top set for everything and he was in the lowest set for all of our subjects so we didn't even meet until the last year of school. we have great conversations though he has a lot of common sense he's really into documentaries and what he knows, he knows a lot about he is great with his hands and loves carpentry as a hobby i wouldn't change anything about him, i just got used to him, we have a laugh and he's a great person we have a son and he is a great dad. you can't always find every quality in a person. but if your happy then there is nothing else that you can do but love him

Answer 2

I have the same problem and what we do is keep different friends. I find her friends and her to just so incredibly boring. The people I associate with are opinionative and have very intriguing conversations. We find that when we go out we rarely go out together, and that suits us just fine. As long as we both still love eachother, thats all that matters. If you truly care you won't try to change them, cause in the end they would be unhappy anyway. Like right now, she made me watch Grey's Anatomy while I preferred to just relax with a good book. This always happens. It comes down to, are you willing to accept his bad qualities and focus on the better parts of the relationship. I can, can you? You also must realize that all good relationships have balance. You both probably balance eachother quite well.

Answer 3

Men are always a little more dumb than women. So never expect a men to be with you on the same intellectual level. You said he is perfect for you in everyway except for one tiny little problem, so I guess a small problem is not really a problem at all. The most important thing is that you love him, and that, is a difficult thing to hold.

Answer 4

My parents have been married for 24 years and aren't intellectually compatible.

Answer 5

No, after everything thing else fades away or starts to sag, you have convo left, but if there can be no intellectual intercourse, you never had me to begin with.