My best friend invited me over to her house to watch a movie and chill at 6 PM. I went. By the time the movie was over it was like 7:30. Than we went online and at 8 her mom comes in and tells me it's time for them to go to bed and tells me to leave. Do you think this was rude? It's not like I just went to their house, she invited me. I usually don't go to their house.
It's like kicking a guest they invited out.
2007-02-15 15:50:20 · 27 answers · asked by Mara D 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
It was SUMMER and a FRIDAY NIGHT! No schooL!!!!!!! No work for her mom!!!
2007-02-15 15:54:46 · update #1
She said "It's time for us to go to bed, it's time for you to go home."
2007-02-15 15:58:26 · update #2
We are 17
2007-02-15 16:03:48 · update #3
Yes it was rude. Problem is that many people have never been taught manners, and parents often behave as if they 'owned' their children.
They have a right to determine when young guests need to leave, but this can be done politely.
2007-02-15 16:02:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 6⤋
It may have stung a little and maybe she didn't ask you as politely as you would hope, but...asking you to leave may have been more polite than whatever else.
Maybe the parents just found out about something that your friend did and was in trouble...and wanted you to leave before she was confronted about it?
Maybe you were invited by your friend and she didn't check with parents first, and the parents actually were being nice letting you stay as long as you did? AND your friend was rude by setting up a visit without permission?
Maybe she was mad at someone else and snipped at you by accident. Rude, yes but misdirected and forgivable.
Maybe the mom wanted you out of the house so she and husband could go to bed early and have sex.
Maybe a parent in the house is an alcoholic and Mom didn't want to see her daughter embarrassed knowing that soon someone would be staggering down the hall, sick, or in a rowdy mood looking for love or a fight.
Maybe they were expecting a touchy phone call.
Maybe someone in the house was coming down with something or needed extra peace and quiet for some other reason.
Maybe the mom had something extra draining going on the next day and WAS going to bed. I wouldn't let my kids have houseguests after I went to bed either....specially if I didn't know them that well, and you said you didn't visit them often.
Maybe anything...that in the end, they don't need to explain to you because it is none of your business.
None of these have anything to do with YOU so it isn't something you did to deserve getting kicked OUT...but that didn't happen, did it? Thrown out on your ear? Asked to just get the HELL out? You didn't describe this. You might have been treated as well as possible.
So don't assume that you were treated badly or hold it against them, this would be rude on your part.
2007-02-16 00:10:18 · answer #2 · answered by musicimprovedme 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm,,,,hard to give a fair answer without knowing more information,,,,firstly, what is your age group, was it a school night, etc?
Also, had you thought that maybe when your friend invited you over, her parents had told her she had an 8 pm curfew but perhaps she was not comfortable telling you that?
I hope this helps you to stop for a moment and think of the reasons leading to this rather than feel and think it was a rude gesture and they were kicking out a guest.
2007-02-15 23:55:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
A parent always has the right to disinvite a guest for any reason, be it morning obligations, to simply that they are finished haveing guests for the evening. Think of it this way, If say your sister or brother had invited one of their friends over and you were ready to go to bed, or had things you needed to do and we're babysitting. How would you feel if you felt like the guest had over stayed their welcome, obviously you can't do the things you want/need to do with the guest present, You shouldn't take offence that she asked you to leave. Also, they may have an early bed time because of an early morning routine such as family excercise, or a trip planned that was meant as a surprise. There are many reasons why she may have asked you to leave, and even in as much as a host should be polite, a guest should also be polite and graciously accept a Host's right to govern the rules for his/her home.
2007-02-16 00:51:23 · answer #4 · answered by nemsethcszardescu 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You did not specify the tone of voice used. That could indicate rudeness. If rude, it may not have been directed at you. Even so, as an invited quest, you have no rights that are not granted you by the owners. It is the parents prerogative to control their children's schedules as they see fit (legally, to 18 yrs). She had every right to request you leave.
It could be she knew you went on-line. Have you heard the latest barrage of anti-Internet ads for parents to monitor their kids on-line activity? See the list of other possible explanations by musicimprov!
Regardless, you should not be offended by this incident. Make better friends of the mom if you want to spend more time there. She is probably just a concerned parent.
2007-02-16 04:11:45 · answer #5 · answered by Yowdy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the mom should have reworded her request, rather blatant and abrupt. Maybe the mom thought you were up to something she didn't approve of, Maybe she dosn;t like you. Maybe she had other plans with her daughter for the rest of the Friday night. Yes it was rude in respect to your age, usually a mom would say that to younger children ages 5 to 10. I guess you are feeling like you don't want to go back there any time soon.
2007-02-16 00:58:34 · answer #6 · answered by atantatlantis 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There may be more to it than you know - maybe your friend's mom told her you'd have to go at 8 pm but your friend didn't tell you that part. Maybe there was something else going on between your friend and her mom, like they needed to talk or your friend was in trouble or something and here mom didn't want to put you in the middle of it. I would give them another chance before you just decide they're rude.
2007-02-16 00:00:26 · answer #7 · answered by Rebecca G 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
At 17, on a friday night, I think that is rather weird at the very least. Do they really go to bed that early? What'd your friend say, was she surprised? I don't know any adults/older teens that go to bed by 8, it may be that her mom didn't like you and just tried to get rid of you.
2007-02-16 03:15:17 · answer #8 · answered by Sheriam 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
When invited to someone's home, it is best to leave before you wear out your welcome. Always leave before being asked to do so. It's always much better to have your host say things like, "Why do you want to leave so early. Please stay." than talk about how someone stays so late.
There's a knack to learning this, but when you do, it will serve you well for the rest of your life (along with other etiquette of being a good guest). People will think well of you and want to invite you over often.
2007-02-16 11:28:37 · answer #9 · answered by Witchy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, it's not rude. People have different rules at their homes and it is not up to you to judge them. My step-daughter lives in an apartment on the same property but her computer is still at our house and we told her she had to go home by 10 pm because they make too much noise and her computer is outside our 2 year-old's room and wakes him up.
2007-02-16 02:22:38 · answer #10 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it was rude! Even if it was said in a nice tone! If you were invited over, I don't think it's nice to tell you to leave so soon!
2007-02-16 04:09:59 · answer #11 · answered by -♦One-♦-Love♦- 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋