My Eldest Daughter? (re opening Questions)?

Question

is just 12 and now shes gone and gotten herself pregnant!!!!
she tells me it was an accident, adn i totaly belive her. her boyfriend and his family are family frends and respectable people.
What should i do? it was her lifelong dream to have children, she aalso has endimetriosis, so concieving will be a enourmouse challenge for her. i love her to bits and i would never force her into somthing she diudnt want. After the loss of my seven yr old daughter to cancer, i dont feel ready to take on anotehr child. :'( please help me.

She told me shes keeping the baby, and we went to her first gyno appt, my god she was so scared she passed out. i love her so mucch but im so scared for her. She has realy bad morning sickness and right now shes in the bathroom puking. :"(

Answer 1

I have been reading this ? and the different responses to it, and my mind just keeps going back to the 12 yr old. I am very pro life but will caring the baby hurt your daughter? I mean is it safe? I would talk to the OB and to my daughter both and then unfortunately its your decision in the end. Shes so young. I will be praying for you (all 3) that you have the strength to make the right decision and to live with that decision. Dont forget that adoption is an answer too. Please let me know how things are going. My email is [e-mail]
God Bless

Answer 2

The mistake was made when you let a 12 year old have a boyfriend. 12, I mean 12, how long has she had her period, yes it was an accident, hell it was an accident when I got pregnant at 15, and I thought I was grown, but nothing prepares a young girl of 15 or even 12 for the rigors of pregnancy and child birth. I believe that you and the boys "respectable" parents need to come together on this one, we are talking about three lives here, how will a 12 year old take care of an infant, maternal skills are not a reflex. My personal beliefs do not allow for abortion and I believe each soul deserves a chance, but you guys are going to have to buckle down as a family and be a family and teach birth control after the baby is born, because after becoming a mother at 12 and having sex, you can best believe she will have sex again. God Bless.

Answer 3

I want to wish you the best of luck with this situation first of all. Second, I don't really think that there is such a thing as "accidentaly" getting pregnant when you're 12. My 12 year old doesn't even know that much about sex let alone is having it. I'm not saying that it's your fault because you can't possibly be with your daughter 24 hours a day and i'm sure that you brought her up well. I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this right now. I think that it is sad that this may be her only chance at having children but I think that it is not right to have a child when you are a child. It's not fair to the mother or the child. Good luck with this.

Answer 4

Wow 12 that is really young. i would say the first thing you need to do if you havent already is take her to the doctor. Just because a 12 year old can get pregnant does not mean she is physically able to have a child normally. Then You love her what ever her decision is. I know you said you lost your other daughter to cancer but don't close your heart to love of another child. this child that your daughter is carring could be the best thing that ever happened. If you force her to get an abortion and she isn't ever able to have children again she will resent you for that Pray and ask God to guide you. Good luck

Answer 5

Some people will tell you not to let her have an abortion.

Some people will urge you to go to the Planned Parenthood with your daughter so the options would then be explained to you.

It is very sad that a 12 years old feel that she is ready to be a mother but is she really emotionally and mentally ready? I'm sorry but I don't think so.

If you let her keep the child, who is going to be paying for the expenses that will come with the child? You? The child's father? Who?

There was someone who said not to let her have an abortion. That would be robbing an innocent baby of her or his life. Unfortunately, whoever that person is forgets that the baby will still be robbed one way or another and it doesn't have to involve life.

The best I can think of is to talk to your daughter, show her how life can be different once she gives birth with all these expenses and the extra responsibilites.

She should know that when she gives birth, just who is going to take care of the baby when she's at school?

There are many questions that needed to be answered and the best way is to have that talk with your daughter.

Answer 6

First of all I would like to say, do not let her have an abortion. I understand that she is only 12 years old but that could be a very traumatizing experience for her at such a young age. No matter how old you are you always have the sense of killing when you opt for an abortion and I don't think a 12yr old would be emotionally stable enough to handle that. Not to mention it is just wrong anyways. I say let her carry the child to term, then you have at least 9 months to decide weather you will help her to raise it, or give the child up for adoption. New born babies have new homes before they are even born. So the child wouldn't grow up bouncing from home to home either way :)

Answer 7

Have you all considered adopting the baby out.'
She needs lots of support. a 12 year old body is not quite mature.
My oldest daughter had a baby when she was 13 i was devastated.
Now she is such a blessing. She sings like an angel. makes straight A's in school and such a delight.
My daughter and her are more siblings but they love each other.
She is such a special gift. She is the reason her grandfather gets up in the morning.
A baby is a beautiful gift of life
This baby maybe a gift in disguise. look at Mary and Jesus.
How old was Mary?
The deed is done. get counseling. She must be scared too
When the reality hits her. Please don't force her into an abortion.
get her and you some therapy and family counseling. parenting classes. Babies are not baby dolls they are a world of responsibility! God bless and take care

Answer 8

WOW! I feel for you...I was a teenage mother (15) and it was hard for me at that age. I have read some others postings and they say dont have an abortion. I know I am opening a can of worms here but I feel that if you cant take care of yourself...how can you bring in another human into this world? If not an abortion what about giving it up for adoption? This is a very hard situation, but like others said, talk to eachother about it. That is the best and only way that you will be able to figure it out together. I pray for you both and it sounds like you have a good mind frame for this and will get through it together!

Good Luck!

Answer 9

I am so sorry about the loss of your seven year old daughter. It must be very hard for you to have to go through so much. Please don't abort the baby. But, do consider giving the child a home with a mature mom and dad. Debrenee (above post) has a wonderful story about her open adoption. Your daughter is so young to have to care for a baby. She is still just a young child herself and you are stressed out. If you decide to keep the baby. I wish you the best of everything and God bless you and your daughter.

Answer 10

Hi, you are between a rock and a hard place.
Children should not be having children period.
But having an abortion will also scar her for the rest of her life.
So it was an accident but one that serious decisions will have to be made.... maybe she can put up the child for adoption to parents who really want a child but can't have one of their own.
Also having endometriosis is a serious concern that may affect the baby so just take things a step at a time and see how the pregnancy goes. When and if she delivers, then put the child up for adoption.