My ex-boyfriend and I are friends with benefits... I'm confused.?

Question

Here's the story.

Me and my ex-boyfriend Adrian "friends with benefits". We've been friends for about 3 years. We were just friends for about 5 months. Then we started dating. That lasted for a month. Then we were just friends again for a while. About a year later, we started dating again. It lasted 3 months this time. We broke up again. Now, we're "friends with benefits". We hung out tonight and the obvious happend... we had sex. But, it seemed exactly the same as it was when we were dating. We cuddled, we kissed (and not just making out, just cute little kisses), we held hands. And he was the one that started doing all of that first. It just seems like he still wants to be more than friends... but I'm confused about it all, since he was the one that broke off the past relationships before.

What do you guys think... Does it seem like he still likes me as a girlfriend or does he just want to be f.w.b?

Oh and sometimes he asks me if I've had sex with other guys since we've broken up and sometimes I just say yes to see his reaction and he gets kind of mad and jealous... but then I'm just like, calm down... i was just kidding.

I never said I didn't want anything more than just f.w.b... I do, because I still love him. I just don't know if he feels the same way. That's why I was asking you what you think...

And seriously, don't be rude and say that I have no self-respect because you know nothing about me. kthnx..

Answer 1

I've been in this situation, only on the other side of it. I was friends with this girl after being her boyfriend and after a month or so we started hooking up now and then. It was for one reason. She was still in love with me, and I was horny enough to take advantage. If i wasn't getting sex from someone else then I would just hook up with her again. And when she eventually hooked up with someone I was angry about it, not because I felt anything serious, but because that meant that she wasn't going to be available to me, if she started dating someone else, and she wouldn't be in love with me anymore, which would hurt my ego. I was very young and stupid, and in the end this girl ended up very hurt. I was such a jerk, but then again I was a horny guy in my late teens. I feel very sorry about it, and I feel sorry for you if you don't get Adrian out of your life for good.

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

Friends With Benefits With Ex

Answer 4

Friends with benefits? That's what dogs do. I still dont' get that but oh well.

He probably doesnt' want to be with you but he doesnt' want others to have you. If you were with someone else, he would probably want to be together again. It's sad that you dont' want something more but good luck.

Answer 5

this is why FWB usally fails
one side get amorous
the other side justs want the sex
he seemingly wants it both ways
when it can't be that way
my question is
why do you not respect yourself?
what are you ugly?
do you think you cannot get another guy?
did you put out early on when you dated
therefore giving him a previews of things to come?
when a girl puts out early on , she gives a guy reason to believe ( and thus no incentive ) to go no further, after all his main objective ( sex ) has bee nreached rather easily
from this point foward he can call the shots ( such as of again and on again with the relationship ) and he controls you
since you lack any backbone to break it off once and for all
and get a grip on who you are and to value yourself
you will always be weak and at him whim and call

the best thing would be to break it off cold turkey
no phone calls
no visits
no email
just leave
start over.. that is to better yourself
and you soon discover small things ( good and bad ) about yourself that you forgot
once you are happy with yourself ( and that typically takes about 1 to 2 years of not dating to fully love yourself )
then you can find men with eyes wide open to date
and not make any of the mistakes your making now

Answer 6

I'm like that with an ex boyfriend of mine too!!! I mean I care about him and we always say we love each other (I've known him for 5 years!) and he has this other girl (actually a bunch) and she's all over him, telling him that she loves him and can't wait until they get maried but they aren't together. But when I'm with him, we do our thing and stuff and we talk and he tells me he loves me and he can't wait to date me again when I turn 18 (next month, 2 days before he turns 23 actually) He and I are always ******* around with each other and the one night at a party at his brothers house, he put his arm around me and looked at his brother and was like "This is my girl right here, she's always there for me" and we're always holding hands and cuddling and hugging each other... I absolutely love it!!! But at the same time it makes me think if he really wants to be with me because a few nights we hung out and he'd answer his phone (and it'd be a girl and he'd tell them love you) but while he's on the phone he'd have his arm around me and rubbing my back and whispering things to me... I actually don't feel myself getting jealous, I just like the attention I guess. But with the one girl, ohh I got into his email and I saw an email from her saying "what the ****, can you not say happy valentines day to me? i thought you loved me" and after I read that I looked at my phone and had a text from him saying "happy valentines day babe"... and so I went back into his inbox and deleted that email from her, hahaha. But anways, I don't have any advice but I just thought I'd share my similar story with you.


♥ Christina

Answer 7

first off, friends w/ benefits (FWBs) can be hard to keep up to, because intimacy tends to bring people closer.

in this sort of friendship, there shouldnt be any jealousy, you can have plenty of FWBs, after all you are supposed to be just friends with sex.

if you two see each other for sex as many days as you did whe you were together, then yes...pretty much nothing changed...no wonder there is jealousy.

the less you see each other, the less chances of having that jealousy BF thing going on, see 1 or 2 days less per week.

Answer 8

ask him if you can start going out and if he says no your going to have to say well we can't do this nemore.. b/c he is getting exactly what he wants. he gets you and also he doesn't have to worry about "cheating" on you when you two are even going out so he can get other girls too. and that can be worse that not having him at all b/c it will hurt you more. trust me im going through the same thing but a lot less..

Answer 9

he really does like you but some guys are like 'hey! i dont wanna be your boyfriend but i dont want you to have a boyfriend either'. you are having sex with him and he'd like to think that your only doing that with him. Feelings cross over though, he might have some affection for you, there might be something more there. it sounds to me like he wants to give you enough to keep you.

Answer 10

hey sweetie...it seems lyk ur in a very complicated state but ima try to help u out of it! it seems to me that he deffinatly still has feelings 4 u but juss doesnt want to be in a serious relationship!!! its not that he wants to date other ppl......but maybe he juss culdnt take the pressure! he obviously still likes u as a girlfreind...but maybe its easier 4 him to think of it as f.w.b!! i think hes probaly confused 2! his feelings are probaly all over the place and hes tryna get them in order!!! u guys obvious care about eachother so i thnk ya'll whould be together!!!! hav a good long talk with him about this...that should help alot!!!!! well i hope everything works out!!!!!! and i hope my advice helped u!!!!!! good luck!!!!!