Out of the Military...What now?

Question

After 6 years, from 00 to 06, I've seperated from the military. I was in the Marines during the time and now that I'm back it's surreal. Sometimes I think it was a mistake I got out, but there are other things I'd like to achieve, it's just hard taking that first step. I would like to go back to school, or start my own business among other things. Right now all I tend to think about though is how my brothers are doing over there and I can't seem to get off my *** and get **** done. Anyone else recently seperated? Im sure there are. But just a little encouragment or advice would help. Thanks.

Answer 1

It will be alright brother.... I retired early after 13 years of service. I am a disabled Vet and damn proud of it! There is an adjustment period after getting out.... It took me almost a year to really take the "uniform" off. I always felt like everyone could tell I was a military man even though I no longer wore the uniform. I didn't like the way a lot of the kids looked and dressed ... Sometimes I would make snide remarks to people who dressed like thugs or wannabee rap stars or the grunge look that makes folks just look dirty. It is an adjustment and your ride is your own.

Take things one step at a time. Get a job that you are comfortable with doing for the mean time while you make up your mind on what you want to do.... I did armed security for a couple of months while I search the job market and colleges. After I made up my mind on what I wanted to do I went out and did it. That is the nice thing about being retired or in your case separated. You get to choose what is right for you for once. Enjoy that freedom that you have so rightly earned. Enjoy picking the place where you want to live, work, eat, etc.

Remember you help secure the freedoms of this land and you have earned the right to choose your path. So... Choose!
Our brothers and sisters in arms know that WE think about them and hope only the best and that is what they would want from us. They would also want you to enjoy the freedoms that you have earned. So.... Enjoy them!

Answer 2

Mr. Blonde ... Thanks for your service, Marine.

What you're going through is nothing new. Millions before you (including myself) have had similar feelings. I won't try to peer into your mind, but I'll say that what you described reminds me of things I went through when I left the service (Army).

One day I was in Vietnam ... the next day I was out wearing civvies. A great weight was lifted from my shoulders, but there were certain things I missed.

In the service, we all depended on one another ... ESPECIALLY overseas. If you were serving in a combat zone, this dependence and attachment you feel to your fellow soldiers could have meant the difference between life and death. You know the old saying: United we stand ... Divided we fall. Whether you realize it or not, you did learn that principle and you learned it very well.

Getting back to the states was a little bit of a shock even though I was young. In the service you had to dress it right and cover down, so to speak. Civilian life is comparatively unstructured. Do you enjoy your new found freedoms? Yes, I'm sure you do. But there's something good to be said about the military environment where everyone counted on everyone and things really got done.

So, I'm not surprised that you're having trouble getting off your butt. You were with Americans before and you're with Americans now, BUT although the differences are subtle, I believe you're very much affected by these differences on a subconscious level.

These that I've mentioned and many other things I cannot begin to imagine are affecting you, so rest assured you're not the first person this has happened to. Adjusting may take some time, but that's to be expected.

All the best to you, Blonde. Thanks for your service and good luck to you!

Answer 3

Listen, take some time off no one is going to yell at you for that

Get a couple career books look through them, more than likely you will want to serve again yet in a civilian capacity.
Law enforcement, conservation, transportation, goverment legislation, small business development, man the list goes on and on then there is the federal goverment.

Go to the local college spend some time there look around at all the young women wanting to meet a real hero and a man...Think about that alot there.

Your heart is in the right place for your friends and brothers you made in the service, you will never forget them and them the same way. As you left service another recruit filled your space, but if you want back in now is the time to make that decision. They probably want you out of the sand too so take that into account. They want they brothers and friends safe just like you want them to be.

God bless and thank you

Answer 4

I hear ya. It took a lot for me to get out of bed every day, but every day I did it and every day it got easier.

Start small. Starting a business can be a big risk, but going back to school is a smart investment, assuming your up for it. At the very least, find yourself a job that you enjoy, even if it doesn't pay a lot. Perhaps a job outside or doing physical labor. It'll boost your endorphins and as a Marine, being in shape feels good. At the end of the day, you'll feel like you've accomplished something. Take it one day at a time, and soon you'll be able to see a plan to start a business, get that degree, or whatever suits your fancy.

As far as your buddies, let them know you care. No one knows better than you what a good care package or letter means. I try to send at least one care package a month. My friend just emailed me and told me that I send the best care packages. Why? Because I did two tours in Iraq and I know what we need and what we don't need.

So do you.

God bless you in this transition. Every day will get easier. I promise you.

Answer 5

I know a lot of people who feel the same thing post military... a lot of service member have a "love-hate" relationship with the military, and when they get out they seem to remember more of the reason they were in then the reasons they got out. If it's the brotherhood you miss, then maybe look into law inforcement, if that's your kind of thing, while you go back to school. Small steps are really key. You've gone from having someone telling you who you are, what to do, and where you live, to being in charge of your own life. So sit down and think about what you really enjoy, and what you would like in the future. Then set out to write out little steps that will get you to that goal. Before you know it, you'll be on your way :)

Best of luck, and Semper Fi

Answer 6

Thank you for your time in the military. You have done your duty in my eyes. My hat is off to you my friend/brother. Don't look back and wish you were there. Look ahead. If you were honorably discharged. Enroll in college, the government will give you help. What do you want to do for the rest of your life. Dedicate yourself to that goal. Set the goal, just as you did in your military training and reach for it as hard as you can. If you need some one to talk to, go to the nearest veterans office and sign up for your benefits. This will allow you to go to a vets hospital and talk to a counselor. My brother in law has been going to a counselor since 1975. He has a good job at Lockheed Company but needs help to come to grips with his actions in Vietnam.
My heart and prayers are with you. Just go for it and don't look back.
An old Vet
Hisemiester

Answer 7

Take some time for yourself. Don't rush into anything yet, unless you really have to. Once you get more assimilated to civilian life, then start to assess your options.

As for your brothers still over there, pray for them and support them any way you can. I can't imagine what that is like (I served during peace time), but I can say it wouldn't be easy.