I know the rule about dating co-workers, I've been there and done that. However, I am about to quit and move on to a different job.
There is this guy at work that I'm very attracted to. We talk and share stories, but he doesn't seem that he ever wants to ask me out. As soon as it's time to go home, he bolts for the door and I don't have a chance to talk to him after work. Another co-worker approached me a few days ago (out of nowhere) and had said that he likes me, and put a little heart to her chest as she said so.
He has a bunch of guy buddies that he mostly hangs out with at work, and I thought that maybe that could have something to do with him showing a lack of interest in taking our friendship outside of work, but maybe he's just not interested in me that way...
I'm confused about what I should do, or if I should even do anything. I'm completely shy and it would be leaps and bounds for me to approach him and ask him out on a date, plus that's his job right? haha
I need advise
2007-02-15 07:03:29 · 14 answers · asked by Chibi 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There's nothing wrong with a girl asking a guy out. It's not a "guy's job" to do it all the time. It shows confidence for a girl to ask a guy and sometimes guys are just plain chicken to ask the girl (maybe because of his friends or his own personal fear of rejection, who knows).
If you really think you like him, there's no harm in asking. Just think it over before hand, keep in mind there is that horrible chance he may turn you down... Don't build yourself up thinking, "He's going to say yes, I know it!," but don't think, "Oh, he'd never go out with me!," either. Just think that you like him, you want to ask him out, and IF he says no, just play cool and say, "Oh, that's cool, just thought maybe it'd be fun." You can still be his friend and maybe it'll come up later if it doesn't work right now.
As far as HOW to do it, just ask him if you can talk to him after work for a few minutes about something and leave it at that. Don't give him too much to go on that would make him anxious, suspicious, or any other uncomfortable feeling for the both of you. Talk to him like normal and keep your cool and at the end of the day, when you have your few minutes to talk, just ask him if he wants to get lunch Saturday or go to a movie Friday night or whatever it is you want to do for a date.
In summary, just keep your cool and have a level head. :-)
2007-02-15 07:11:58 · answer #1 · answered by Robeau 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I met the love of my life at my old job. We both actually had significant others, but we just clicked from day 1 and it was undeniable. My advice to you is take the chance! He may like you too, but you'll never know until you try! Theres nothing wrong with asking him to hang out. Maybe hes doing the same thing as you and all he needs is a little kick in the behind! Maybe if you just ask him to hang out, things could take off from there. The more interest he sees from you, the more you're likely to get back.
2007-02-15 15:11:56 · answer #2 · answered by just wondering 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Traditionally, it is the man's job to do the asking. However, in recent decades, society has adapted to the woman asking the man out. He may also be shy and afraid to ask you out. Find a nice middle ground. Ask him to go to lunch one day. It has less of the usual date connotations and will give you a chance to talk to him. If he is not interested in dating you, then you at least had a chance to clear the air. If he is interested, then you have a starting point for your relationship.
2007-02-15 15:10:51 · answer #3 · answered by fly guy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait until you are ready to leave the job. You're right, dating a work can be very unhealthy. Don't try too hard though, if he really wants to go out with you he will ask. His job? Biggest misconception! If you want to go out with him then ask (after you leave).
2007-02-15 15:09:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,why not starting with asking him if he would like to go out for coffee or be bold and if he would like to go after work one night to have a beer and shoot a game of pool with you for fun and talk just start if off as not a date just two friends having a good time and see where that goes.thank you for listening yours truly chip
2007-02-15 15:59:20 · answer #5 · answered by chip d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got the word from your co-worker. Call this guy over the phone and ask him out. I'll bet anything he'll go.
2007-02-15 15:07:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some men dont appreciate women pursuing them and some dont mind. Play safe and just enjoy talking to him and getting to know him more and more. Here's a nice article about relationships in the office.
http://www.relationship-affairs.com/Romance-at-the-workplace.html
2007-02-15 15:10:41 · answer #7 · answered by Sofia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"And put a little heart to her chest as she said so." You attracting both ends of the spectrum? You have to decide what is right for you. Maybe he leaves on the dot as he has to get home to his wife and kids......
2007-02-15 15:07:56 · answer #8 · answered by Bagpuss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Circumstances would be perfect when you are ready to resign from your current position. Tell him that it's been fun working with him and that you'd really like to stay in touch and exchange contact info with him. If he is interested, he will get in touch.
2007-02-15 15:10:41 · answer #9 · answered by sleepingliv 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think you should talk to his friends make sure he likes you an he just might ask you out but if not girl you better go for it because you might just by mad an say to youself what could have happen
2007-02-15 15:08:21 · answer #10 · answered by Brittany 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋