Is the relationship really over?

Question

Last night my fiancee told me that in his mind we have failed. I asked him if he had any resolutions and he said no. That is all he had to say and went to sleep. In my mind, I heard the relationship is over and there is no fixing it. So do I take assume it's over and that he is going to move out of my house? Do I start buying replacement items (washer/dryer/etc), because he will surely take his with him? When I try to talk to him he always answers questions with questions and is very evasive. I know we have issues (nothing in common, no closeness regularly). He always tells me I don't like him and I don't want to marry him although I have NEVER said this or even given him that idea, it really makes me wonder if it is him that does not like me and does not to marry me. He has issues with telling the truth most of the time, so I know talking about it a waste of time. What to do??

Answer 1

When he says you don't like him, he is just trying to make it your fault when it's really his fault that the relationship "failed." Tell him to get out, now. You don't need him.

Answer 2

Discovering you are incompatible is very hard to deal with, once you realize the relationship isn't going to work, it gets even harder. Are you truly happy? he doesn't sound happy. All the stuff i have to tell you is stuff your not going to want to hear. The most important thing is to understand what is going on with the relationship. I'm sure you love each other, my ex and i still love each other but sometimes love isn't enough especially if you can't work together. we could never have a good time when we went out we were both completely miserable is that the same for you?¿i wouldn't jump the gun and start buying new items until you are sure you are going to need them, maybe he is just having a bad week/month. it's hard to determine. I wish you the best of luck though take care.

Answer 3

Let me ask you something...are you secretly relieved by this occuring? Like you said...you have nothing in common, and you two are not close regularly. And it seems like you have done nothing to prevent him from thinking that you DO want to marry him.

So perhaps...you secretly want out and don't really know it yet? How long have you been with your fiancee? Maybe it's really time for you two to part ways, because only you know if you were really happy with him.

Isn't it fair to let him go and get on with your life? Isn't fair for the both of you to be happy?

Talk to him. Tell him to grow up and talk to you. Ask him if he has plans to pack up and leave your house. Make plans to resolve all of your issues (by this I mean him leaving, separating everything from bank accounts to the cds).

Before you do this, really talk to him. Ask him if he wants counselling. It might help.

I hope the best for you.

♠

Answer 4

Geez...this is so familiar...just went through this with my ex. She would frequently "omit" the truth, or just lie...and I would have to badger her to tell the truth before she would finally spill it. we had NOTHING in common....she was a suface person...and I am not, I am much more intricate. We would go on long drives and she would sleep half the time...no good conversation, because she wasn't on my level.

Trust me, if you are the way we were, do yourself a favor....and as much as it will hurt, and your heart will tell you not to....tell him, ok we are over, now find somewhere else to live. Stick to it....your decision for it to be over, no booty-calls. If you do that, a month from then you will be better....if not, you will have a lifetime of misery because it sounds like you two aren't exactly "lovebirds" or permanent marriage material

Answer 5

Being a man, ikn ow the way i would approach a situation like that I would just lay it out ,listen this is not how I fell but however I will not continue in this way ,put the ball in his court tell him it is his choice what he does and that you will not continue to endure this kind of uncertainty.Make your mind up to stay or get the hell out.I had to tell a wife of 8 years that once it isn't easy but it brings the problem to a head without you being vicitmized anymore.Make no bones about it ,his uncertainty will end up driving you crazy,I'm not a control freak but i hate to be controlled and that is what he is doing leading you along bring it to a head you will be better for it no matter what the out come.I was and I would have n ever guessed being without my wife made me happier and i found someone else who made me happy

Answer 6

sounds to e he is feeling these feelings but doesnt want to be the onne to admit it so is trying to shift it on to you so u will say it for him. if he oly answers questions with questions then rite down whatb u want him to answer and email it to him or give it to him so he can fill it in that way he will have some tomme to think what he wants to say without you bein there waiting for a answer. the firstthig to break a relationship is no communication doesnt mean u have to say it face to face because sometimes men find that hard n they go quiet but you need communication wether that is thro emails notes or texts.
if he isnt willig to talk then start buyig now.

Answer 7

Get your priorities straighten, and if you think its worth it trying to make it work, go ahead, and if not then go on with your life... Is he the only PepsiCola in the desert? There are lots of more of 'em in the warehouse!!!!!!!

Answer 8

Honestly, if this was not the end, I´d brake up, if I was n your place. If you´re not sure your partner loves you (telling about him, not you), why marry afterall?

Answer 9

1st if he really want the relationship it would have been n ended n 2nd mayb all ur second guessing ur self means it is over in ur mind

Answer 10

i think he is seeing someone eles and doing all he can to make you brakeup with him because he dont want to hurt you. He is not being faith @ the moment