Why did the chicken cross the road? (make something up)
2007-02-15 02:47:06 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
he was trying to get away from the cook
2007-02-15 03:06:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Because Ricky Martin was across the way and the chicken was such a big fan that the chicken crossed to road to meet him.
Ricky was puzzled as this chicken came waddling across and right to the singer's feet.
Clucking and cooing and cawing the chicken was just a spurting out all it could to let Ricky know how much of a fan the chicken was.
Ricky stood there, utterly confused, yet understood every word the chicken said.
They later married and have 3 kids in Peru.
2007-02-15 11:36:38 · answer #2 · answered by prizefyter 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Plato: For the greater good.
Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.
Machiavelli: So that its subjects will view it with admiration,
as a chicken which has the daring and courage to
boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom
among them has the strength to contend with such a
paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the
princely chicken's dominion maintained.
Hippocrates: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its
pancreas.
Jacques Derrida: Any number of contending discourses may be discovered
within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and
each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial
intent can never be discerned, because structuralism
is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!
Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.
Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment
would let it take.
Douglas Adams: Forty-two.
Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road
gazes also across you.
Oliver North: National Security was at stake.
B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences which had pervaded its
sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a
fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while
believing these actions to be of its own free will.
Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt
necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at
this historical juncture, and therefore
synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.
Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself,
the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.
Ludwig Wittgenstein: The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into the
objects "chicken" and "road", and circumstances came
into being which caused the actualization of this
potential occurrence.
Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed
the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Aristotle: To actualize its potential.
Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-
nature.
Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing
events to grace the annals of history. An historic,
unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt
such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to
homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.
Salvador Dali: The Fish.
Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from
the trees.
Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.
Epicurus: For fun.
Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.
Johann von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.
Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.
Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken
was on, but it was moving very fast.
David Hume: Out of custom and habit.
Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored)
reason.
Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?
Ronald Reagan: I forget.
John Sununu: The Air Force was only too happy to provide the
transportation, so quite understandably the chicken
availed himself of the opportunity.
The Sphinx: You tell me.
Mr. T: If you saw me coming you'd cross the road too!
Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow
out of life.
Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.
Molly Yard: It was a hen!
Zeno of Elea: To prove it could never reach the other side.
Chaucer: So priketh hem nature in hir corages.
Wordsworth: To wander lonely as a cloud.
The Godfather: I didn't want its mother to see it like that.
Keats: Philosophy will clip a chicken's wings.
Blake: To see heaven in a wild fowl.
Othello: Jealousy.
Dr Johnson: Sir, had you known the Chicken for as long as I have,
you would not so readily enquire, but feel rather the
Need to resist such a public Display of your own
lamentable and incorrigible Ignorance.
Mrs Thatcher: This chicken's not for turning.
Supreme Soviet: There has never been a chicken in this photograph.
Oscar Wilde: Why, indeed? One's social engagements whilst in
town ought never expose one to such barbarous
inconvenience - although, perhaps, if one must cross a
road, one may do far worse than to cross it as the
chicken in question.
Kafka: Hardly the most urgent enquiry to make of a low-grade
insurance clerk who woke up that morning as a hen.
Swift: It is, of course, inevitable that such a loathsome,
filth-ridden and degraded creature as Man should assume
to question the actions of one in all respects his
superior.
Macbeth: To have turned back were as tedious as to go o'er.
Whitehead: Clearly, having fallen victim to the fallacy of
misplaced concreteness.
Freud: An die andere Seite zu kommen. (Much laughter)
Hamlet: That is not the question.
Donne: It crosseth for thee.
Pope: It was mimicking my Lord Hervey.
Constable: To get a better view.
My Answer: To get to his girlfriend.
2007-02-15 11:50:46 · answer #3 · answered by THE UNKNOWN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No the real question is, why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken!
2007-02-15 11:56:08 · answer #4 · answered by Tom Riddle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mr. Chicken was on a Mission. His Lady Hen was over there by the Lemonade Stand. Phineas Peacock was buying her Pink to drink, and Flirting with her!
Somebody's in Trouble!!
2007-02-18 18:54:10 · answer #5 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The chicken crossed the road to get better cell service.
"Can you hear me now?"
2007-02-15 11:56:12 · answer #6 · answered by NJ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Had to cross the road to get where he was going... hell I don't know
2007-02-15 13:23:40 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because he was in the bucket next to me when I left Kentucky fried chicken
2007-02-15 11:03:28 · answer #8 · answered by sphericaluniverse 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Because it wanted to cross.
2007-02-15 11:30:14 · answer #9 · answered by hyder_pillai 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well his gf wuz on the other side and he was all lightheaded while crossing and he wuz lumbering over drooling and and the road wuz actually an airplane landing strip and a plane wuz landing and ran him over
2007-02-15 10:59:15 · answer #10 · answered by turley345 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Obviously, because he was chicken!!!
2007-02-15 15:11:50 · answer #11 · answered by kim 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋