Breastfeeding? From someone who's breastfed and bottle fed.?

Question

I didn't breastfeed my first child and now I'm due my second and I'm thinking of breastfeeding, I feel really terrible though as they say it's much better for the child and I'm scared it'll show in the later years and I feel I shouldn't do things different with my second child as I didn't do it with my first. Also some advice from women who've breast fed does it take a toll on your breasts will they ever be the same again I really need some advice.

Answer 1

What takes toll on your breasts is pregnancy, not breastfeeding. However, there is evidence that if you keep your weight gain within reasonable limits, you will not experience as much sagging as those who balloon 60 lbs.

HOWEVER, it has been my experience -- and indeed, the experience of most women in my family and many other women I've talked to -- that breastfeeding leads to weight gain. Yes, I know, doctors tell you that breastfeeding burns extra calories, so you should be LOSING weight, right? Wrong! While my appetite during pregnancy was quite tame, as soon as my milk came in, I became a human vacuum cleaner -- eating as often as every hour. My cravings were unbelievable. I didn't even have any desires for specific foods -- just a feeling of overwhelming hunger. I ate at night, woke up at night ravenously hungry -- just like my baby. Many times, I caught myself thinking that I couldn't remember how many meals I had had that day. I remember, among other things, standing next to the fridge half-asleep, gnawing on a frozen hotdog because I didn't have the patience to wait for it to warm up in the microwave, thinking "This tastes gross, but I have to eat" -- it was that bad. All my willpower simply evaporated. So, for the 400 or so daily calories that I was burning through breastfeeding, I probably took in 1000 calories above my norm. After I stopped breastfeeding, the cravings subsided within a few weeks, and I am now beginning, slowly, to look like my old pre-pregnancy self.

Another thing to consider: As you remember from your first child, I am sure, there will be a few sleepless months for your after the baby is born. How do you keep yourself awake enough not to stumble around like a zombie or, godforbid, drop the baby? If you are breastfeeding, you can't have coffeine, nor any herbal supplements designed to perk you up. The only safe way to get extra energy is to consume sugar. And boy, did I eat sweets during those months; I thought I was going to have a diabetic shock.

My supply was reduced considerably when I went back to work. A month after that, I introduced my baby to solids, and almost immediately, he stopped treating breastmilk or formula as real food. So, by 6 months, there was no point to it anymore. My son still drinks formula, but only as something to wash down a real meal. I'm still basking in the relief.

Going back to the breast question: mine are no longer obscenely big, and they look no different now than they did before the pregnancy.

Answer 2

I breast fed my son but only for 2 months (as he decided to wean himself). Breasefeeding is a completely personal decision. It can be quite stressful at times, but it is also very good for your baby and a great way to bond with your little one. I know that after I first had my son, I would get frustrated when he wouldn't latch on and would feel like I was doing something wrong. Scheduling can be an issue as well, because you really should plan any trips out in between feedings, just a whole lot easier. My breasts recovered just fine, I mean they aren't exactly a 20 year olds perky breasts but the look pretty much the same as the did before. Also breastfeeding is so awesome when they aren't sleeping thru the night yet because you don't have to get up and make a bottle, you got the food right there.

It's all a matter of what you feel more comfortable with. If its not right for you and your child, don't stress out about it. Obviously your first child is doing just fine and he was bottle fed. Just make a decision that is comfortable for you and your family.

congrats on the impending arrival

Answer 3

My sister had a little boy, Theo (her first child), almost a year ago and made the decision to breastfeed. She really wanted to do things naturally. It soon became apparent, though, that she wasn't producing as much milk as Theo needed. She reluctantly began giving him formula while still breastfeeding and found that he quickly got used to the consistency of the formula and got fussy when her breast milk wasn't flowing as fast as he'd like. When he was almost four months old she stopped breastfeeding and stuck with formula. Now her breasts weren't very big to begin with and that have been part of the problem. After she stopped breastfeeding they went back to their original size.

The reason I told that to you is I wanted to let you know that if you make the choice to breastfeed you can't be sure how much milk your baby is actually getting - so you need to watch carefully for signs of hunger. No mother likes admitting that they can't supply their own child's needs, but it is something to be aware of.

My aunt, who was also small-breasted when she started having children, breastfed all three of her children until they were three-years-old. Now she wears a D-cup. So everyone's different, and though most women I know saw their breasts go back to the way they were after breastfeeding, it doesn't always happen that way.

And about your worry over doing it different with your second child than your first - it's not likely your eldest child will hold a grudge towards the new addition because of being breastfed or not. Do what you think is right for your second child.

Good luck making this decision.

Answer 4

I breastfed my first child for the 1st year of her life. I then had twins - boy/girl - my twin daughter breastfed just fine but my twin son couldn't get the hang of it - I decided to quite breastfeeding them both cuz I felt it would be unfair, etc. it's all water under the bridge and doesn't matter now - but I feel it was stupid of me not to breastfeed my daughter just cuz my son wouldn't. Honestly, in the long run it doesn't matter - I know they say breastfeeding is best - I don't know - I don't see my oldest daughter reaping all these benefits from it - all 3 of my kids are equally bonded with me, happy and healthy. The biggest pro to breastfeeding is the cost!!!
As far as breastfeeding taking a toll - I think gravity takes a toll more than anything.
If you want to breastfeed do it, don't worry that you didn't w/your first, really it's not that big of a deal. If you don't want to do it then don't, and don't feel guilty that the baby will be missing out.
I think you should make the decision based on what will work best for you and your family.

Answer 5

I have breastfed and formula fed both of my daughters. My 1st daughter, I breastfed for 2 1/2 months until she caught a cold and seemed to not want to nurse anymore. My 2nd baby is 4 months and we're going strong. The best things about breastfeeding is the connection made between baby and mom and the immunity benefits for the baby. You learn and grow with parenting just as anything else in life so there, no guilt, only growth. Honor the woman you were, too when you decided back then not to breastfeed. Maybe you're also more patient now. Don't worry about that, but I know what you mean. You kind of feel like you're giving more to your 2nd than you did to your first. So, there, it must then have value for you, right?
As far as the toll on your breasts, age, time and gravity are going to do their thing whether or NOT you breastfeed! Many breastfeeding Moms have gone on to have marvelous breasts and some Moms who fed for 5 minutes have lowsy, saggy boobs. Everything is relative. Peace and Congrats!

Answer 6

I tried to breastfeed my first child. It worked out for about 4 months, then she just stopped. She never really took to it. I gave her formula after that.
My second child breast fed right away and refused to take a bottle. (I would sometimes give him a bottle of breast milk if I had to go somewhere).
I really enjoyed breastfeeding over bottle feeding. It is much more convenient, really. You don't ave to worry about allergies or intolerance's to formula, (my daughter had to have soy formula), you don't have to make a bottle in the middle of the night, and you don't have to carry around extra bottles and formula everywhere you go. On top of that the baby gets much need antioxidants and a much healthier diet.
On the other hand, unless you can pump and the baby will take a bottle, you are the only one that can feed the baby. You are the one waking up for feedings, not your spouse or partner. Sometimes I felt like my breasts no longer belonged to me.
In the long run, my kids are 8 and 6 and both healthy and happy. Like I said before, I really enjoyed breastfeeding and would do it again in a heartbeat, but it is your decisions to make. By the way, my breasts are fine after breastfeeding! :)

Answer 7

I solely breastfed my son, but years later when I had my daughters, I had to do both. Bottle and breast. It does take a toll on your breasts, but who cares. As long as your baby gets the best chance in the beginning then that is what matters. It may be uncomfortable at the beginning but it will be just like second nature in no time. The bonding you have with your child is just irreplaceable. Don't worry, you will be wonderful at it and even if it takes some time getting used to, you can always get some guidance from the baby Dr. It is natural to feel guilt in some of our decisions as mothers. You are not always going to be able to do everything the same for both children. Do whatever you can and with your heart, that is all that matters anyway. CONGRATS!!!

Answer 8

You shouldn't feel guilty about breastfeeding your second and not your first. Yes, it is best. However, is your first child happy and healthy. Of course, so don't fret. There is too much guilt out there for mothers. Don't buy into it. Anyway.
I breastfeed my son for two and half years. The only toll on my breasts, they are still larger than my pre-pregnancy ones. (Four years later.) Which may or may not be due to breastfeeding.
I do hope you decide to try breastfeeding. Just don't pressure yourself. Set little goals. Get to six weeks, then three months,six months, till whenever you decide to stop. And don't buy into the guilt. Its worthless.
I have a ton of information and websites about breastfeeding. Feel free to contact me if you want it. Here is one of my favorite sites.
http://www.breastfeeding.com/

Answer 9

Your body is designed to breast feed. The effects of pregnancy and gravity will take their toll on your breasts whether you use them for their purpose or not. They do go back to normal, although just about all women tend to get a great deal of stretch marks from being pregnant, and the engorgement of breast feeding seems to take them longer to fade.

It can be painful if your baby isnt good at latching on, or if you get an infection. But compared to pregnancy, labor, and all the other pains of life, its not that bad. Theres a great sense of accomplishment that comes with it.

The long terms effects of breast feeding are NOT scientifically or medically proven, although the health of the child in the first year is just about ALWAYS better when fed breastmilk and not formula. So dont even try to beat yourself up over breast feeding one and not the other. They will be the same when they are grown. The whole IQ, smarter child thing is just LLL propaganda.

Its certainly MUCH simpler than bottle feeding, and it makes life a lot easier. Plus its easier to get out and about when the milk is in you and not in the diaper bag.

Answer 10

Like pregnancy and labour each woman has a different experience with breast feeding. I would suggest that you give it a try and see how it works for you. I really don't think in 20 years your oldest is going to say that he hates you because you didn't breast feed him but you did his younger sibling. Also you are going to do a lot of things differently with this child than you did with your first. Because they are two different people and I would like to believe that you have learned from the mistakes you made with your first.
So give it a try and see if it works for you.