Is 20 and 29 to big of an age gap to be dating someone? I recently found this guy that I really REALLY like. He's sweet, funny, and we have a lot in common. He recently told me however that he wasn't the original age he told me which is (25), because I told him I'd only date guys that were 18-25. He said that he liked me so much that he couldn't help but lying about his age and that it had been eating up at him ever since we met and he finally just told me the truth. I've never really liked a guy as much as I do him and his dishonesty was only because he wanted to be with me and give him a chance. However, I'm really worried that 20 and 29 are too far apart. I might have called things off if he told me this right off the bat, but now I've learned about him and like him a lot. The thing is, I feel that it's better to be with someone closer to your age and it's always been something I followed. I'll be broken if I leave him. He likes me and his apology for lying was so long and sweet.
2007-02-15 01:51:13 · 23 answers · asked by Crancrab1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I feel from the majority that it's ok to be with him and age isn't that big deal. Some of you made some good points about the whole lying issue and I just don't want to make a mistake and just want to spend my life with the right person. I'm still confused a bit.
2007-02-15 02:50:46 · update #1
TRUELY!!
The LONGEST marriages I've ever known to LAST for a lifetime are the ones that have 8 years and over in age difference. I know people that are 12 and 15, even 33 years older than their partners. VERY loving relationships. GO FOR IT!!!!
To Date I’ve known 35 couples that were 8+ years apart in age, 20 couples did last a lifetime and now reside next to each other in eternal bliss in whatever heaven there may be.
Age is a state of mind.
2007-02-15 02:11:12 · answer #1 · answered by Renoirs_Dream 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No Way!!
you both really like each other!
age is nothing!
specially 20-29..thats really common!
you'se are both adults,
20-is the age when you are an adult, 18 and 19.you still havent matured properly.
and guys mature later then girls.
its a perfect match..
My opinion of too much of an age difference for a 20 yo would be about 34 because at that age you see things differently, oyu want diferent things, you want a companionship, some one to spend the rest of yor life with and have children with.
20 and 29 is perfect
2007-02-15 02:01:49 · answer #2 · answered by LostMyMind 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They say "age is nothing but a number", that's true, but the real test is are you mature enough to be with a guy that's 9 years older. He may like to go to bars occasionally and you can't yet, will that bother you? He may be approaching the time in his life where he's ready to have children, can you handle that? I believe the only negative is that your lives may not be at the same point. Coming from a guy who dates a lot of older women, you two definantly have to be thinking on the same wavelength to have things workout.
But, if you like him and everything has been fine so far, it's only right that you give him and the relationship a shot. You wouldn't want to regret it later.
2007-02-15 02:00:32 · answer #3 · answered by blueboy342 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, when I was 20 I went out with a couple girls that were between 26-30 and at the time you don't realize it being 20, but being 26 now I can see the difference and how its not compatible. You really are on 2 different parts of your life. At the time I was in college, I was going out every night, and to be honest all that has made me what I am. To not do that and be tied down to someone who is older who experienced that and doesn't want a part of it makes you miss out on it. Or worse yet if a almost 30 year old wants to go out every night with you to bars and having wild times, well they are 30 and thats really sad that they haven't figured themselves out yet and can't get out of that mode. Think of it this way if this guy is so great why does he have to go after a 20 year old ( No slight on you but theres something wrong - if he isn't going out with someone around his age that probably means people around his age understand what he probably is). Not to mention the fact the guy had to lied to you at and from the beginning, doesn't that throw trust right out the window. What does he tell you next months from now, "Well you told me you didn't go out with married men so I just had to lie and say I wasn't but I really like you and thats the reason I did it". Theres nothing wrong with acting your age. No reason to tie yourself down to something like that. And your right its better to be with someone closer your age because you will be going through the same things together at the same time. If your just looking for something for now, then whatever, but if you are looking to get caught up in something serious its way off base.
2007-02-15 02:01:35 · answer #4 · answered by Big D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He lied to you off the rip. Is he that needy? Sounds like he will put himself first because he has no respect for you, or your wishes.
Having young attractive girls hanging on you is great for your image(I know from Exp.), but when the novelty wears off, the end is rough, usually much worse for the younger one. You never want to be an object or a sex toy.
You may be broken leaving him, but if you wait, you will be shattered. It all just comes down to the fact that he mislead you, that makes him not a "stand up" guy. Who knows what else he will do.
It is really difficult just to have a good relationship. When the age gap is 15% or more, the difficulty increases.
2007-02-15 02:12:18 · answer #5 · answered by steak n' eggs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At 20 you are still finding yourself, and in dating someone that much older at 20, they may, unintentionally of course, force his identity on to you. Give yourself time to find yourself, maybe date every now and then, but I wouldn't get serious yet. Date lots of guys, find out what you are looking for in life (you might think you already know, but things do change) and just have fun. Plus, if he already lied to you, how do you know he isn't lying about other things?
2007-02-15 02:01:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Age is never the problem, as long as you are both of legal age of consent. It's maturity that will get you everytime, but don't confuse maturity with age. If you have as much as a connection that you described, go for it. You won't find someone like that everyday.
2007-02-15 01:57:28 · answer #7 · answered by Just D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
decide for it, assuming you're the two over 18 (or notwithstanding the criminal age is the place you're). i've got dated somebody 14 years older and six years youthful. A dating with the dazzling individual will artwork no count number the age distinction.
2016-09-29 03:44:41 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hunny age aint nothing but a number because u can be 23 and act like ur 10.....if u think that ur maturity is at a level where you can keep up wit him then go 4 it besides nobody can change how u feel about him
2007-02-15 01:56:35 · answer #9 · answered by [{ unordinary girl }] 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think once you turn 20 its like ages dissapear. and if you are 20-29 you are the same age, 30-39 you are the same age, and so on...
so if you get along, and you like eachother, i dont think its too big of a gap.
2007-02-15 01:56:33 · answer #10 · answered by <3 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋