How much eye contact is appropriate with strangers?

Question

How much eye contact is appropriate with strangers? What about with those who are of the opposite sex? E.g. The amount coming from the female and the male exchange? I find that sometimes if you haven't made eye contact with one of the strangers around you, sometimes they are aware of this and try to estabilish eye contact before they leave, even if you deliberately try to avoid their gaze - they get quite persistent and some do get annoyed - why is this, even if you don't know them?

Answer 1

It depends on the situation. In a social thing it is best to not do too much.

If on a street late at night, I will keep complete eye contact if I think the other person(s) a threat.

--That Cheeky Lad

Answer 2

It depends on the situation and the context of their relationship. In most cases, I would say that if the person is around the same age as you then eye contact is perfectly acceptable, providing that you break the contact once in a while to avoid staring. Also, try nodding and smiling so the other person can see that you're paying attention to what they're saying. If you find it too awkward to look directly into a person's eyes then try looking at their nose. To the other person it appears that you're looking into their eyes.

From a female perspective I think females much prefer to have males look them in the eye that talk to their boobs as that indicates that they're not at all interested in the conversation.

Answer 3

I have always looked people straight in the eye, and i judge people by their ability to do the same back. That doesn't mean i stare at strangers on buses or anyone distant, but if I talk to them i keep almost 100% eye contact without trying to look threatening. If I'm talking to a group of strangers i ensure that i spend time looking at each of them at some point, this is good manners and inclusive.

Its a great trust generating thing to do.

And of course you shouldn't treat women any different, but take a little extra care not to be threatening.

Answer 4

Eye contact says a lot about a person - and their inter-person relationships. When talking to friends or family, it is a very important part of a relationship.
With strangers, this is different. My personal policy is to get on a bus, etc, and look round the bus - thus making eye contact, without getting involved. Someone might think you are 'stuck up' or anti-social if you don't do this, and see it as a challenge.
But with a stranger, instant eye contact, then look away is the best policy - especially as a female. This way, you acknowledge that the person exists, but indicate that is as far as it goes.
Hopes this helps - but perhaps you have eyes to die for? Lol

Answer 5

It's standard to have eye contact with the person you're talking to. You don't have to worry about wandering eyes too much, people look away from each other all the time because of some distraction. That's why it's standard, because if you're not looking at them, then they think you're distracted and they don't have your attention. People who are in love respect each other more, typically, and that's why they look each other in the eyes so readily, but it's not really something that you have to worry about. If you're looking at someone while talking to them (generally in the eye area) then you'll be fine. Don't stare though, then things get awkward. I would consider it to be rude for someone not to look at me during a conversation unless they had some kind of condition. But if someone just wasn't looking at me or was only looking at my mouth, I would probably feel like they didn't want to be talking to me or that they really wanted to kiss me, which isn't always a good thing. So, don't avoid eye contact I guess. Look at someone in the eyes generally, but don't stare. Look at they're face. It's only awkward if you think it is, and not many people think it is. Generally, we're used to it. It comes naturally.

Answer 6

I think they get annoyed about it because to deliberately avoid looking at someone is rude . If this is while you are speaking to them, then it's extra rude. It doesn't matter if you know them or not, to deliberately avoid eye contact while interacting with that person is insulting.

If you are on a bus, train etc, then you don't need to look at anyone. This is perfectly normal.

Answer 7

Depends on the situation I guess. Difficult one to pin down. I rarely make eye contact when public speaking as it puts me off my stroke. I make a lot of eye contact when serving in the pub that I work. Don't know really

Answer 8

The whole eye-contact-with strangers thing, especially with women, can be very awkward, which is why I try to be a gentleman and just stare at their boobs instead.

Answer 9

As one is glass, I try to make contact with at least one eye of another person. Although sometimes I try to keep contact with both eyes by flitting it about. I never make eye contact with strange men and if I feel them looking at me I pick my nose. This usually works and they look down at their shoes.

Answer 10

A little trick ; if you look between someones eyes ie the top of their nose,it looks like you are giving eye contact even if you are not really