My son, aged 7, studies in class 2. His teacher recently complained to me that he lifts girls skirts, goes to their toilet, bends down to peek under the frock... and even tells girls that he wants drink their milk. He always wants to sit beside girls...Otherwise he is normal in studies and other activities. Plz suggest...
2007-02-14 21:09:07 · 21 answers · asked by Praveen 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
You are obviously sufficiently worried about this to ask us on here for advice. You are quite right to be worried. Please ignore the suggestions that this is somehow 'normal' behaviour for it is not. Perhaps we are a society of paranoids, but schools have been alerted to look out fort this kind of behaviour as early as 7, as it can indicate future problems with the child's sexual conduct. Yes, it is normal to be curious about the opposite sex but, no it is not usual to invade another child's personal space in this way nor to make comments like that.
The teacher was right to alert you to this - it is up to you to follow this up (I strongly suggest a child psychologist) before they do. You sound like a caring and responsible parent and I am sure the school will be entirely supportive of your efforts to sort this out before he gets any older!
2007-02-14 23:14:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Ah, childhood curiosity at best. While it's perfectly natural for kids his age to be curious, he's also at an age where he can be taught that he needs to respect others' personal space.
I suggest sitting down with him and acknowledging his behavior, and reassuring him that he is NOT in trouble. If he isn't reassured that he's not in trouble, it could actually have an opposite intended impact on him. After informing him that he's not in trouble and you understand that he may be curious about the differences between boys and girls, it's best to ask him if he has any questions that he'd like to ask you. Make sure to use anatomically correct words as this is the best and only sure way that he'll be given correct information and not inadvertently mistake it for something it's not.
Let him know that if he has questions, it's best to ask you. Put him in their shoes. Ask him, "would you want people looking at you when you go to the bathroom?" More than likely he'll tell you "no" and you just need to calmly let him know that other children he knows feel the same way. Just remember that it's important to not make him feel like a "bad boy" for doing this and just keep reminding him that he needs to remember "hands off" and ask you any questions he may have.
And just know that this is more than likely a phase. If his behavior happens to get more severe, or more physical, it may be a wise idea to seek the help of a trained professional. Though we'd all like to think that everything our children do is a phase at one point or another, it's not always the case and as parents it's our job to make sure that our children are provided with the best possible care and upbringing, even if it means we have to send our child to a therapist. I wish you the very best in your parenting journey!
2007-02-14 21:23:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
nicely, once you've a female friend probability is you're a divorced figure.. So, once you've custody of your 5 twelve months. old it may well be an excellent element to positioned a lock on your door to avert destiny invasions.. or you could attempt to get an in one day sitter- in case you and your female friend opt for to have sex even as your son is there. If he's purely purely vacationing for the weekend perchance you/female friend can practice some discretion about your lovemaking and attempt to both no longer make love or save it down so that you do not wake your son.... solid success
2016-11-28 04:17:09 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs counselling - sorry but this is not normal curiosity. He seems not to be recognising boundaries. Many children at that age will test the boundaries but generally there is an instinctive awareness that there are places that you just don't go - and one of those places is the girls' toilet!
Ask the school to recommend someone that can help with this. They will be only too happy to assist you.
2007-02-15 22:52:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
well kids copy what they see, if not at home then what is he watching on TV? you need to sit down with him and tell him what he is doing is inappropriate and there will consequences for this' the teacher should send him to the office. you better take care of this now or I am sorry you are gonna have a huge problem on your hands this is not normal behavior for a 7 year old.
2007-02-14 22:53:55 · answer #5 · answered by kissybertha 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Sounds to me like he is just curious, and has an interest in girls at a much earlier age than most boys probably would. I think the answer is going to lie with having some discipline at home. If no one addresses this problem to him, he's going to continue to think that his behavior is acceptable. He needs to know that it is NOT acceptable and that there will be consequences if he continues to do what he is doing. Be firm, but fair.
2007-02-14 21:13:31 · answer #6 · answered by C J 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You need to intervene as his father!!!
You need to teach him it's inappropriate to treat girls like that. He must have learned such behavior from someone, and it's a good idea to find out whom.
He also may need some age appropriate sexual education to demystify the opposite sex.
2007-02-14 21:35:35 · answer #7 · answered by Chellebelle78 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
just sitdown and explain to him why he shouldn't do these things. each time you hear of him or catch him doing this, you need to reinforce the fact that it is not ok to do this. you may even need to take some things away from him if that doesn't help but hopefully it won't have to come to that. hope this helps. good luck.
2007-02-15 04:00:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hes just being curious.
often children go through this stage if they havent already when they were a toddler.
Most people suggest when you have a toddler to let them see you go to the toilet and bath together and not be shy when getting changed etc.. as this helps to prevent this behaviour later on.
You might need to sit your child down - and at 7 they should understand alot, and say how its not really acceptable - and its upsetting people - dont shout / judge, but suggest he just sits with girls and thats it.
Maybe he is self concious around boys and feels more comfortable with girls?
2007-02-14 21:13:41 · answer #9 · answered by schmushe 6 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Smack him in the head for being a perv. Then explain to him what sex actually is and how you dont just go up and lift girls skirts.
2007-02-15 06:22:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋