Changing my childs last name?

Question

My boyfriend left me when I was 7 months pregnant with my son and I went into premature labor and had him at 32 weeks . I was so upset that he left me that I didn't give my son his last name! I gave my son my maiden name.Now my son is 11 years old and I would like to have it changed to his fathers name.I don't want anything from the father he hasn't helped at all up til now and I don't expect it ever. I just realized that he should have his rightful name like I had my fathers name.I should never have robbed him of that out of spite. I would appreciate any answers I can get THANK YOU

Answer 1

My Goodness! I sure can't understand why you would ever think you should put this deadbeat sperm donors name on your wonderful son as a last name.

But----since he is now 11 years old, why don't you leave it up to him? Surely he must already know the story of it all or he would still be wondering why his name that he has had for 11 years be all of a sudden changing to a different one.

Maybe, you have already discussed this with him. I don't know. Just because the man had sex and produced your son, sure didn't make him a father if he left you while you were pregnant.

Anyway, if you/your son desire for the name change to happen, I suggest you call Child Protective Services and ask then if they would recommend a cheap attorney.

I did that last year when I was looking for one in order to adopt my grandson and found one through Child Protective Services just by calling and asking for references and explaining that finances or actually the lack of finances was a big factor.

Good luck!

I hope you really think this situation through, though.

Answer 2

I had this same situation some years ago. I got an attorney. I was told that it's called a legal name change. I was also informed that changing the childs name will not terminate the rights of the biological father. I think you should get an attorney to change your son's name. The attorney is going to want to pursue getting back child support which is a waiste of your money. It's best to go to the attorney general office of your state and file for child support. The attorney generals office will really enforce the support. They will take it from him through witholding his income. The attorney general will also put his payment record on his credit report. They will not force a relationship with your son and his biological father . If he try's to connect because he has to pay. Too bad for him. You can just ignore him and make him pay for his own attorney to try to fight for vistitation rights. He'll give up once he see's he's on the losing side.

Answer 3

I would not change the name. Right now you and your child have the same last name. Why would you want to open him up to a ton of questions as to why he and his mother have different names. Your X wanted nothing to do with his son. I think you will do more damage to your son by doing this to him at this point in his life. If when he is an adult and wants to change his name he can do so on his own and it will be his choice. By changing his name now he might feel is lost and rejected by you.

Answer 4

11 years old is still at a young age without a father. So don't tell him the story with your boyfriend. But you can lie and give a name slightly the same to his father and once he is old enough to know the whole story, tell him and he will forgive you. If you don't want your boyfriend's name, then don't use it. After all, it's your son.

Answer 5

Your son is 11 years old. While is is fabulous of you to be thinking of your son, it is not necessarily what he wants. He already has his identity.

Talk to your son. Tell him the truth, and your thoughts, and see what he wants to do.

Don't beat yourself up about this. You were in a terrible situation and any decent person would have made the same decision as you did. It was a good decision. It was the right decision. Now it is up to your son what the right decision is now.

Answer 6

A last name means nothing if someone is not going to stand behind it. Your son will always have his father in him, after all he has half his DNA. The father has not been in his life, and seems not to be. Let your son live his life with your valued last name. Remember names are nothing but a label. But its who we really are and become that really counts. We should stand for something bigger than ourselves. I hope this help you..

Answer 7

Your idea sounds like a punishment to the true farther of the son. This is not the way to do it, you should realise the new 'farther' may also turn to be too much arrogant to the kid. Stop your thought keep the son informed on the truth.


All the best of luck.

Answer 8

When I was in high school I changed my last name to my step-fathers name--even though he and my mother had divorced. I grew up calling him dad and I wanted his last name. I think you son is old to decide what he wants. Have you talked to him about it?

Check with your state, but in my state you can change your name to anything you want, but to change it on the birth certificate you would need the fathers permission.

Answer 9

1st ya have to establish paternity, have the guy sign that he is the father or have the courts determine it through tests in the state your son was born take that to the court house and get a new birth certificate. or he can sign a legal document that hes the father and ya can change it that way------total cost 10.00, its easy. start with the clerk of cout in the state he was born, they will walk ya through it. good luck!

Answer 10

You should speak to your 11 year old son. If he knows the truth let him choose. Keep him under your maiden name until he wants to choose. Its no longer up to you.