I have trouble getting myself to come forward & actually go out on dates. I am really comfortable around guys until they ask if they can take me out. I will spit out any excuse I can think of to get myself out of having to go. It's not like I am not interested in them, because they are always really sweet & charming. I don't know what I am afraid of or why I am like this. I've had long relationships in the past & never did I have this sort of anxiety before. My last relationship did kind of put me on guard around guys though. I'm wondering if I'm just being picky or if I am developing a problem that could follow me.
2007-02-14 19:40:17 · 6 answers · asked by Never alone 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There is this one guy, though, that I have liked for quite some time & I can spend time alone with him very easily.They aren't really dates, but they always have the look & feel of a date. I have also known him for a long time & I can trust that he wouldn't "try" anything with me, because he knows that I'm not cool with that at all. With him I would actually really love to have the real thing. Do you think I am turning away from some potentially good dates simply because I want to make excuses to justify my feelings for this other guy? Am I just being picky? What's wrong with me & what am I so afraid of?
2007-02-14 19:47:14 · update #1
It sounds like something has happened in the past that has hurt you and you didn't sovle that issue and it is following you, whatever it is you need to resolve what it is before you start dating again
2007-02-14 19:46:32 · answer #1 · answered by Jane_Doe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Interesting..I was actually about to ask this question, but I saw that you had asked it. I've only been on one "occasion" alone with a boy. That was okay, because we are good friends, and I can go with them as friends, but as soon as its called a "date", I get scared. I don't understand. Maybe I'm scared that I won't be all cracked up to be what the guy expected. I'm beginning to think that is why. Or, perhaps we're just not comfortable with ourselves yet, so we can't expect someone else to be comfortable with us. I think there are a lot of reasons..the main one is just modesty and shyness I think. I hope to get over this...shh..don't tell anyone, but I may go on a date next week. : ) I dunno..maybe I won't, but if I do, I'd like to think of it as a friends night out instead of a date.
Hey..email me at gotfaith1989@yahoo.com
I hope this works out for us!
2007-02-16 15:23:26 · answer #2 · answered by morethanitseems 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't say what the problem may stem from--but anxiety is a real issue and solving this is easy---you need to stop asking everyone else and then honestly ask yourself what the problem is and what are you afraid of---be HONEST about it. You just aren't ready to date---so what?? When you are, you will. Stop even worrying about it and give yourself some time. relax, do your school work, hang out in different places and meet new people. Just politely say that you are not available for dating at this time...just be nice and accept it for what it is.
2007-02-15 03:48:16 · answer #3 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe after a couple of not good relationships, you are feeling insecure about yourself and your choices. Just go out on dates for practice and you should start to feel better about dating again and when you meet the right guy you would have had dating practice, just make yourself do it
2007-02-15 03:45:38 · answer #4 · answered by Miranda C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you're gun shy. What happened with the last relationship that triggered this? Did you get hurt badly?
2007-02-15 03:44:05 · answer #5 · answered by tony1athome 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
t'is better to have loved and lost -
than to never have loved at all
and going on a date is NOT a lifetime commitment
go make somebody's night! - You will enjoy their company, too!
best of luck
2007-02-15 03:44:08 · answer #6 · answered by tom4bucs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋