hate my inlaws i cant stand them,my husband claims hes caught in the middle and hates his life and says hes going to die soon from all this, but from my side i dont tell him any complaints his mom on the other hand has a list made of lie complaints with fake stories attached with dramas attacted etc,,,he stays quiet after her lie complaints then he snaps on me out of nowhere when his brain is full and angry. at first he told me that his mom only does this due to something I DID sometime someday meaning from his side its my fault his mom curses insult and harrasses me, still that gives no one any rights to try to get her son depressed and tired of his life he fights with me n sleeps in the other room and shes relaxed then, when he comes home from work its like hes her husband she gives him company feeds him gives him tea then turns the lights off and he sleeps,,what is this?who is this woman?
2007-02-14 16:58:34 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i noticed he talks and gets mad but when its time to defend me he cant speak hes quiet he told me thats my maa im not going to say anything even if shes wrong...i see something odd about that maybe she will say i raised u now ur fighting with me over ur wife then tell his sisters n everyone will fight with him,,what do u think?
2007-02-14 17:00:35 · update #1
TELL YOUR MOMMA'S BOY HUBBY TO GROW A PAIR OF HARD BOILED EGGS AND STAND UP FOR HIS "OWN" FAMILY! AND...IF HE CAN NOT, YOU WILL HANDLE IT IN YOUR OWN FASHION AND IF HE DOES NOT CARE ON HOW YOU HANDLED IT, TELL HIM GO HOME TO MOMMA!!!
2007-02-17 03:39:50 · answer #1 · answered by brxny2000 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hi...First of all I feel you are still young..might have got married newly. Otherwise by now you would have found a way to deal with the situation. This in-law problem is century old..for which it is very difficult to find solution. The only way to handle the situation is to behave in a more matured way and be cool. She wants to irritate you..trouble you...make you cheap infront of your hubby. But you just fight this out and show that she cannot irritate you,,insult you. But one thing as an educated female..you please dont do the samething to her. These cheap arguments will not take us anywhere. Maintain your dignity and silence. They say 'silence is bliss'..so be silent..patient..that is if you love your hubby.
Your hubby is another typical man who is failing to balance betn. his wife and mom. While he is considering more responsible for his mom..he feels you should manage, which is surely wrong. But if he is not capable of handling the situation you cannot do anything about it. R u working? If yes..then lucky...forget all this and concentrate on yourself. Improve your personality. Be silent for some time. Your hubby will surely come back to you. For how long will he listen to a woman who is fighting...scolding...irritating? You drag him towards you with your love..affection and quiet dignity.
O.k Gud luck!!!
2007-02-14 19:56:03 · answer #2 · answered by Saheli 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. My mother in law is a certified nut who enjoys drama, but me & my husband (her son) stay away now. In the begining my husband felt guilty and sided with his mom. We also had many fights because she would get him so crazy he would take it out on me. I got him to realize that we had a good normal life when she was not around. I stoped defending myself. I made it know I could care less on what she said or thought. On the other hand my mother in law succeeded in braking up my brother in law and his wife. Get your husband out for the evening tell him you are no longer going to fight over his mom and ask him how he would like you to handle her If he tells you to ignore her then better for you. I would avoid her in a nice way. Put on something sexy. If he goes to sleep in the other room go in there and jump into bed. Your mother in law is not going to win in that department. You can win this I did, stop trying to get him to tell her off. Say nothing to her and be as sweet as honey to him trust me it will work. Good luck
2007-02-21 07:55:04 · answer #3 · answered by Kat G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your husband need a place of your own. You cannot live with his mother because she is controlling him. He feels guilty if he does not take her side but, you are his wife and his first allegiance is to you.
Do not fight or argue with this woman. It only makes it hard for him. Just tell him that the two of you must find your own place. That is the only answer to this problem.
2007-02-22 15:45:07 · answer #4 · answered by 4HIM- Christians love 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love your mother in law. Dont have personal disputes with them on anything. Dont comment on anything. Keep smiling face with a poor and modest attitude. After somedays the husband will get power to fight back. Now he is in such a situation that all the details he gets is mistakes from both sides so he is in difficulty as to whom to shout upon? Once you keep quiet he will then start screwing his parents and sis / bro on the grounds and ur husband will say:::::::
"My wife keeps quiet .. she doesnt even argue with u and also she doesnt give me back answers when i shout at her for you all in fact she asks me to keep cool and assures me best in future" "Why the hell u all are after my wife???""""""
Trust me this will take time but i'm sure that ur hubby will become ur big fan and then he will hate his mom if she misbehaves with you and even in future if u said something to your mother in law he will not believe her
2007-02-14 21:29:29 · answer #5 · answered by Pankaj B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is quite a common prblem. she is very jealous of u. avoid being loveydooey in front of her, save that for when both of u r alone. do not argue or correct her when she does anything wrong or instructs u against ur wishes. just keep an innocent smile on ur face and do what u want to do and ur way. ur husband will get irritated if u constantly nag him abt her. he knows his mother well, it is just that he does not want to take sides so leave him out of that mess. he will definetly relax in ur company & give u gifts or do things for u to show his love and appreceation without its knowledge to ur mil. CHERISH THOSE MOMENTS.
2007-02-15 03:00:41 · answer #6 · answered by tanushree m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is this fairly worth it? If this mamma's boy is somewhat what you opt for then you opt for to take action. employ a small storage locker for all yet your needs, perchance visit it each and every 3 days for what you'd be donning. pass to the 2d hand save and seem for an inexpensive wide suitcase that locks with the keys and save your each day stuff in it lower than your mattress. pass purchase a voice activated recorder, they're fairly lower priced now and do not require a tape. seem for a "holster" to carry it in an not easily considered spot on your self. record your interactions with this lady and faster or later even as she has been somewhat terrible to you get her and your guy at the same time and whip it out for both to take heed to. which will be a kill or remedy second on your relationship. If his mom gained't take the room and board money you provide positioned it in a discounts account which will be accessed in trouble-free words with both your signatures. Then deliver her on a 28 day cruise once you've saved the fee. You and he owe her respect...it truly is her homestead...yet she owes you a similar because the lady her son has chosen to be with.
2016-11-28 04:02:33 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is using emotional blackmail. to quieten you and favor his mother. My husband does the same when he is at wrong .before i used to say dont say like that. Now i just say carry on .Now his dying drama has reduced.try it.
Also when your husband sleeps in other room dont bother to give him attention . Neglect him. He will miss u sooner or later and come. if u cant beat them join them. let him go to sleep in other room and let him come back by himself.Also dont take blame for anything u havent done.When my fil accused me of wrong things i didnt accept it and gave him a stern dose.u need to buckle up and let your mil know that and reply suitably. If ur husband scares u then stay with your parents for few days. He will call u back. best of luck.
2007-02-17 17:25:59 · answer #8 · answered by di 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very common problem. The MIL feels threatened that her son will go out of her control, so she tries to create rift between the two of you. The son is also caught in this situation and it is difficult for him to defy his mother. However keep patience and slowly your husband will realise that he has to stand with you. You will also have to be diplomatic with your MIL and try to win over her.
2007-02-14 17:19:10 · answer #9 · answered by Rahul 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you living with your inlaws in the first place? Move out and make a life of your own without her constantly in it. You should know by now that you can't have any peace with two families living under the same roof.
2007-02-21 12:46:18 · answer #10 · answered by hollywood 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he is a mom's boy.and a mom's boy never grows into a man he always remains a boy only even at the age of 40 and above. and mom takes it 4 granted and make full use of it.hope ur hubby grows up into a man!!!!!!!!!!!
if possible get separate from ur mil. wha t is ur age and kids?
wish u all the best
why we women tolrate all this i did 4 shake of my kids.
2007-02-14 18:40:02 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋