im in love with the father of my unborn son,but right now we are in the middle of a big disagreemnt and due to that he has even changed his number , im mad cause instead of fixing our problems he makes them worse, i believe he is back with his ex wife,i guess i need to move on but i have an ego so the fact he did this to me isnt cool, i want to make him regret treating me this way,but how?i do love him but i just dont see it working anymore,it does hurt me alot the fact he may be back with her.i dont regret my child cause at one point i was told i couldnt have children so the fact hes out of the picture in that sense doesnt bother me,i dont need him to raise this baby,but i love him as a man.
please do me the favor and save your stupid comments for someone who needs them,as i know some people on this site are just stupid,so if you have nothing smart to say dont say anything cause u just windup looking like a jerk!
2007-02-14 14:34:52 · 10 answers · asked by stevie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You may consider this to be a stupid comment but I'm going to say it anyway : you cannot make a person love you. Either they do or they don't, period, there is no in between. Just like being pregnant, a woman can't be "a little bit" pregnant, and a man can't be "a little" in love.
It's very easy to be confused about being in love as it's not an emotion that's simple to define by any means. Different people have entirely different ideas about what "love" is.
My personal outlook is that love is a mixture of numerous things: the right chemical interactions between two individuals; the romantic, cupid, chocolates and roses fantasy of romance novels and valentines day; the biggest psychological fetish around.
That last bit is kind of cynical but if you look at what a fetish actually is (a rough definition of a fetish is something which becomes necessary for sex to be enjoyed) it makes sense - most women do not enjoy sex unless their partner is saying he loves her, even if she knows deep down that it's not remotely true, she needs to hear it, thus it has become a fetish for her.
Though I'm sure you don't really want to hear this, personally I'd say you're way better off. Yes, it hurts, and probably will for some time, but push the ego aside and don't worry about making him regret it or trying to get him back - unnecessary stress can be a factor in miscarrying, do your best to just let it go and be happy with what you came out of it with, a gift you thought you'd never have. :)
2007-02-14 14:50:03 · answer #1 · answered by JM 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
alright now that you have lectured those of us who at times make smart remarks. lets enlighten you a little bit. first of all you are pregnant and the father is no longer with you. OK you didn't work out. he doesn't want to hear from you (changed number). why is that? were you calling him all the time? who cares where he is now. you have a child on the way, so forget getting back at him and concentrate of the two of you. its not hard to get awarded child support. time to grow up. pay attention to yourself and not what everyone else is doing. that will only make you mad. what good will you be as a mother being angry at a man who left you. now don't even say that wont matter because you will be a good mom. it will matter. children sense when something is wrong. now on a lighter note, congratulations on becoming a mother. it must have been a pleasant surprise after being told you couldn't have any. good luck to you.
2007-02-14 22:50:52 · answer #2 · answered by zsaffireblue2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, congratulations on your baby. Being blessed with a child is wonderful. I wish you all the luck in the world.
I'm not sure you can really convice this guy to love you. But then again, that depends upon the gravity of your "disagreement". Is it something serious? Does he want to be the father of your baby? Is he willing to support you. If the answer to either of those last two questions is no, than this man, may not be the kind of man you want to be with. I understand falling in love with people even when its not right or doesn't make sense. But honestly, Is this guy IT?? Is he, your "one"?
2007-02-14 22:44:54 · answer #3 · answered by mlove1307 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cant make anyone fall in love with you, or even like you. He is the one who is in the wrong by first of all getting you pregnant and leaving you and second of all had been in a previous marriage. You should not waste your time on him, find someone else. It could be too, that you just WANT to love him and for him to be with you to raise your child together because it is the right thing to do. But loving someone means that you want to be with them regardless of your current situation and you can live together in harmony. If you know that it wont work, then you should definatly move on, its a lost cause.
2007-02-14 22:44:44 · answer #4 · answered by translucent_spyder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl you need to move on. He doesnt deserve you and he never will and trust me he will regret walking out on you. My advice would be to forget about him you dont love him you just love the man he was pretending to be..a big difference. Just keep telling yourself youll be happier without him and that you have something terrific to look forward too a baby!. Like we all say the past is the past and should be forgotten look forward to the future. Dont worry there will be someone better out there for you and your baby.
wish you all the best and hope i helped.
xoxoMoeisha
2007-02-14 22:42:28 · answer #5 · answered by Moeisha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love have to work both ways, no point u loving him and he doesn't, that wld create more problems for u later on. Move on if he is such irresponsible person...he shld be a man and take care of u, cos he is the one that make u pregnant. You can give it a try and talk to him directly and tell him abt ur feelings towards him and see how it goes from there.
2007-02-14 22:39:27 · answer #6 · answered by DooGie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is hard what you are going through. But you need to just let him go. If he has gotten back with his ex then there is nothing you can do. There are plenty of nice guys out there that wouldn't leave you pregant and alone. Take care of you and your unborn baby and dont worry about what he is doing. Moving on is your best revenge. Good luck!
2007-02-14 22:39:23 · answer #7 · answered by chemky1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to have a new life with your baby. Don't think too much about your ex. Sometimes guys are very complicated. Try being friends with him. Just give him some space to think about it. I guess he also thinks that you are too 'troublesome' in a way. That's why he changed his number. Just to ignore you. Sometimes he do care about you but he doesn't show it in a way. I guess I'm helping.
2007-02-14 22:47:44 · answer #8 · answered by ♥♥Pro♥♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't convince someone to love you. It just will hurt you even more. It's hard to move on and maybe you will never be able to really move on, but you should try.
2007-02-14 22:38:10 · answer #9 · answered by GucciGirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No amount of convincing or reasoning can make someone love you. It doesn't work that way.
2007-02-14 22:39:35 · answer #10 · answered by Alan K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋