Dude, my girlfriend is totally jealous. She won't even let me talk to my gal friends without screaming at me for it later. I seriously dread the end of my last period because she meets me at my locker, and we ‘talk’. It’s like the Spanish Inquisition! I tried to tell her to chill out about it, but she’s all, “are you saying I’m controlling?” I want to just scream, “YES! That is exactly what I’m saying!” but I really do like her and stuff. But one of these days, I’m going to lose it!
So the question is: do you think that it’s worth it to be with a girl you like, but half the time, just can’t stand? Is there a way to make her…? I don’t know… Calm?
2007-02-14 14:14:12 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The only way to do that, is to be honest with her. Have you ever given her reason to be jealous (have you cheated on her in the past)? If not, then you need to tell her that no, she isn't being controlling...but she IS being insecure. Tell her you are her boyfriend, and she is your girlfriend, and that you are not now, nor do you have any future plans to cheat on her, and that she needs to understand that, and trust you.
Tell her that your female friends were your friends before you met her, and if you wanted a romantic relationship with them...it would have happened before now. You can't let her start choosing your friends! Trust me...if you let her control that much, she will continue to control you in other ways. Just be sure you DON'T breach that trust, and do anything you promised not to.
2007-02-14 14:21:13 · answer #1 · answered by Lisa E 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think that people that have jealousy issues may be insecure, as long as you make her feel like a million bucks, she should have nothing to worry about, but if you treat her the same as a buddy, she maybe should be just a buddy too. Are you spending more time with her than your other female friends?
Do you flirt with her and not your friends?
Does she maybe have a reason to be jealous? (Like was she cheated on before, or did she cheat on an ex) there are many reasons why people get jealous. The best thing to do is tell her how you feel, and tell her you want her to be happy too! Would it be ok for her to get rid of all her friends? ask her. it wouldn't be fair to not have friends (either of you).
She needs to find a way to deal with her insecurities. maybe she just needs soeone to talk to. Sorry about your issue!
2007-02-14 14:22:51 · answer #2 · answered by 24tulips 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her go - sounds like her jealousy leads to rage which could lead to something I'm sure the both of you will regret further down the line. Jealousy is a sign of insecurity, but both of you are very young and are probably running neck to neck when it comes to being insecure. Tell me - how would you deal with a girlfriend who had lots of guy friends whom she communicated with on a regular bases?
2007-02-14 14:20:59 · answer #3 · answered by LMMMD 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can understand the feelings u feel , your girl friend is really worried about you !!
it doesn't mean that u keep talking with girls , it's OK but i guess your girl friend loves you then anything in the world , and try to change the style that you talk with other girls just keep a distance for the sake of the real GF
2007-02-14 14:26:46 · answer #4 · answered by av 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her, look, if you really trust me, you shouldn't worry about me having other "girl" friends. And if she keeps bugging about it, just leave her. No, I don't think it's worth it. That's not a real relationship, and trust me, it will pass if you just 'like her'. If you can't stand her and you guys are always arguing, it's not gonna last, one way or the other. So just break it now and save your time. You can't change anyone so you can't make her calm. If she's that jealous then she's gotta go get some trust issues solved. lol.
2007-02-14 14:19:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy is a form of insecurity. Your gf has a self esteem issue and when she sees you getting along nicely with other girls she feels threatened. Try boosting her ego with your complete attention and start including her in your conversations with the other girls your talk to. Give her no reason to lose trust in you. Go from there sweetie - good luck - hope it all works out for you.
2007-02-14 14:20:36 · answer #6 · answered by Decoy Duck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest that you introduce your friends to your girlfriend. Also try to go out with your friends and your girlfriend at the same time.
2007-02-14 14:17:59 · answer #7 · answered by ~*Marie~* 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Break up with her.
Sounds harsh but I don't know why you tolerate it.
I'd hate it if my boyfriend wasn't okay with me having guy friends.
That's lame.
Talk to her and tell her that you're not going to stop talking to all of your friends for her. Because she is trying to control you. So not cool.
2007-02-14 14:16:58 · answer #8 · answered by :] 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she´s obviously very insecure and there´s nothing that you can do to "fix" that. She has to overcome it by herself. I bet you a million dollars that if you stopped talking to every girl at school, she´ll find some other reason to distrust you.
It´s really up to you to decide whether that relationship is worth the trouble. Good luck.
2007-02-14 14:22:00 · answer #9 · answered by No se 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello. In my opinion I think that you should try to talk with her about it but be careful what you say. I think that you should reassure her that she is not controlling and that she is pleasant in every way. But if you have some major issues I think that you should tell her but be VERY careful about it.
2007-02-14 14:21:02 · answer #10 · answered by mind-scaper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋